


Oh Baby!

by teamchasez



Category: Dale Earnhardt Jr - Fandom, NASCAR - Fandom, NASCAR RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-19
Updated: 2018-09-19
Packaged: 2019-07-14 10:32:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 46,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16038674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamchasez/pseuds/teamchasez
Summary: Learning his best friend’s sister plans to have a baby causes Dale Earnhardt Jr to start seeing Sarah in a different light.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written in 2013.

Chapter One

“Looking at the clock will not make the day go by any quicker,” Tony Eury Jr. called to one of the mechanics. It was the fifth time he had caught Michael Hawkins looking at the clock that hung on the wall of the bay.

“You got a hot date, Hawk?” Dale Earnhardt Jr. asked with a grin. 

“Yeah, with your sister,” Michael, who was better known as ‘Hawk’, grinned as the ‘ooo’s’ rang out through the shop.

“Kelley wouldn’t look twice in your direction.”

“She was doing more than looking last night,” Hawk sent Dale a wink for added measure.

“You little,” Dale reached out, catching Hawk around the neck, pulling him into a headlock. Hawk’s Atlanta Brave’s baseball cap fell onto the shop floor. He tightened his forearm around Hawk’s neck as his friend struggled to free himself.

“You fuckin’ stink,” Hawk gasped. “Run out of your sissy perfume?”

“Didn’t have any at your sister’s house,” Dale laughed as Hawk struggled harder, elbowing him in the gut.

“Hey!” Tony Eury Sr. yelled across the shop floor. “Take that shit outside!”

Dale and Hawk straightened up at the elder’s voice. When Tony Sr. yelled, they knew well enough to listen.

Hawk leaned down grabbing his hat putting it back on his head. When he saw Tony’s back was turned his arm shot out, sending a punch into Dale’s shoulder, “Asshole,” he muttered.

“Fucker,” Dale knocked Hawk’s hat back off as the two began to scuffle again.

“Damnit Dale,” Tony Sr. turned around and eyed the two men. “Get out of my shop!”

“You heard him,” Hawk grinned. “Go sign some autographs or something.” He laughed when Dale gave him the finger as he walked from the shop toward the stairs that led to the offices on the second floor.

“I don’t know why you’re still standing here,” Tony Sr. said as he stood in front of Hawk.

Hawk bent down to pick his hat up again and quickly followed Dale’s footsteps from the shop.

“Damn kids,” Tony Sr. shook his head with a smile as the shop door closed after Hawk.

Hawk walked down the hall to Dale’s office. Seeing the room empty, he continued to the conference room where he found his friend sitting on a computer chair. In front of him were tables lined against the wall full of die-cast cars that needed to be signed. He took refuge in a stray chair and crossed his legs at his ankles. He watched Dale scrawl his signature upon the items.

The two of them had been friends since high school. Over the years their circle of friends had been switched out, but they had been the two constants.

“Do you ever work?” Dale asked not looking up from the task. The cars seemed endless. The worst part was when he got done with these; there was a second layer below.

“Not if I can help it.” Hawk said as he glanced down at his watch.

Dale sighed and put his sharpie down. “What is your deal? Do you have some place to be? You can leave now so you can get to wherever you need to get to.”

“Not really,” Hawk said. He brought one leg up, resting his ankle on his knee. He fiddled with his pant leg.

“Bullshit,” Dale said. “You keep looking at your watch, wanting to know the time. Something’s going on tonight. What is it?” He picked up the sharpie again, making quick work of a column of cars.

“My sister called me yesterday,” Hawk started. “She said she had something important to discuss with me. So she’s coming over tonight. I’m just worried at what this ‘something important’ could be.”

“Little Eyas is coming?” Dale’s hand stilled over the car he was signing. Hawk’s sister, Sarah, was four years younger than the both of them. The age gap had earned her the name, Eyas, which meant baby hawk or little hawk.

“Yeah,” Hawk nodded. “Last time she told me she needed to tell me something she ended up marrying dick face.” Sarah’s ex-husband, Cory, had not been well liked in the group of friends. They tolerated him only because he was Sarah’s husband. Hawk hated the way Cory had treated Sarah. There was no love lost when they had gotten divorced.

“She seeing someone?” Dale asked tentatively. He kept his voice even. He concentrated on writing his signature. 

“Not that I know of. But that doesn’t mean anything. I didn’t know about dick face until she was showing me the ring. If I had, I would have talked her out of it. Or scared him away.”

“Heh,” Dale nodded. “Oh yeah.” He agreed. The first time he had met Cory, he knew he was a piece of work. He didn’t understand what Sarah saw in him. He was loud, demanding and rude. The cookout they had at Hawk’s, Sarah waited on him, fetching his beer and food. Dale had hardly been able to talk to her.

“If this is the case,” Hawk was saying bringing Dale back to his friend. “I’m gonna call you. There is no way some rat bastard ass clown is getting a hold of my baby sister again. Speaking of sisters,” he grinned when he saw Kelley walk into the room. He stood up from his chair and walked toward Kelley. He took her hand and twirled her around before bringing her back to him.

Kelley laughed and rolled her eyes as she shoved him away. “How’s your wife, Hawk?”

Hawk grinned. “Angie is doing great.” He had been married for seven years. But he and Angie went back to high school. They were high school classmates, barely even friends. He hung out with Dale, while she walked in a different social circle. After graduation she went off to college out of state and he hung around Mooresville. She had moved back after graduation and that was the end of it. They married and had one child and one currently on the way. “I’d drop her in a heartbeat though if you said you wanted me.”

“Angie would not only kick your ass, but she’d rip off your dick,” Dale chuckled. He loved Hawk’s wife. She had the right attitude and intimidation mixed in with her beauty and intelligence.

“I’d settle for a little on the side.”

“Get out of here,” Dale said. “Call me if you need my help tonight. You meeting at your house?”

“Yeah, Sarah was coming today after work. Even offered to watch Ethan for us so Angie and I could go out.”

“Buttering you up,” Dale said. “Let me know what happens.”

“I will,” he waved to Dale and as he turned around sent a wink to Kelley. “Until tomorrow,” he said before he left the room.

“What’s going on with Sarah,” Kelley asked after Hawk had left.

“No idea,” Dale said not meeting Kelley’s eyes as he signed the cars. “She wants to talk to him about something important.”

“Ah,” Kelley nodded watching her brother. “Last time she was getting married, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s hope she has a better choice in a man this time around,” Kelley said. “When you’re done in here, I have some papers for you to sign.” Her brother’s groan followed her from the room.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

“Will you sit down!” Angie snapped as she watched her husband pace back and forth in front of the living room bay window. “Damn Michael, you’re driving me nuts with all this moving.”

“I can’t help it,” Hawk sighed and glanced out the window, hoping to see his sister pull into their drive, but the road remained empty. He moved across the living room and took a seat on the couch next to his wife. “I want to know what this is about.”

“Mike, Honey, you’re worrying over nothing. There is no way Sarah is showing up announcing she is getting married again.” Angie rubbed her hand up and down his thigh before patting his knee. “That was a long time ago, Sarah grew up a lot. She won’t make that mistake. And we know she’s not dating anyone.”

“Well this can’t be good news,” Hawk said. “Something important. What could it be?”

“Maybe she got promoted at work or is moving and it’s out of state,” Angie volunteered. “There are a million possibilities. We just have to wait and see.”

“I can tell you one thing,” Hawk said as he heard gravel crunching outside. “If she is announcing her engagement she will not get married until I approve of him. I won’t even go to the wedding.”

“Michael,” Angie said her eyes wide in shock. The look on her husband’s face told her he was serious.

“I won’t stand by and watch her get hurt again,” Michael stood up from the couch and walked over to the front door. He pulled it open as his sister came bounding up the stairs.

“Mikey!” Sarah grinned and threw her arms around her brother, pulling him into a hug.

“Sarah D,” Hawk said, hugging his sister. He hugged her tightly. They had a great relationship, but with her living in Raleigh and him in Mooresville, working long hours at the shop, they rarely got together. “You need to move back here.”

Sarah smiled at her brother. “I know. I miss it here. It’s home. But I have a good job that I can’t let go of, especially in this economy.” Her gaze flickered over her brother’s shoulder to see her sister-in-law in the doorway. “Angie,” she moved from Hawk’s arms to Angie and drew her into a hug. “How are you? How are you feeling?”

Angie returned Sarah’s hug. When they broke away, she rubbed her stomach. She was five months along with what she was hoping a little girl this time, but Michael swore up and down it would be another boy. But they won’t know until the baby decides to make an appearance. Both her and Michael had agreed to be surprised again this time. The guys at the shop had already started a pool. 

“I’m doing good,” Angie smiled. “Getting tired a lot more though. When Ethan goes to pre-school in the afternoons, I take a nap.”

“You need to rest up,” Sarah said as she walked into the house. “You need all your energy to keep up with my nephew.”

“Sarah! Sarah!” Ethan scrambled up from the living room floor and ran into his aunt’s arms. He squealed and giggled as she captured him and swung him around before kissing him.

“Ethan!” Sarah hugged her nephew tightly. She leaned back staring at him. “You look so much like your daddy. And you’re getting so big! How old are you now? Ten?”

“Four!” Ethan exclaimed proudly holding up four fingers. “Play wif me, Sarah!’ He struggled in her arms to get down and once his feet were on the floor he pulled Sarah to the living room floor where his cars were arranged on the carpet.

“Did you catch a ring?” Hawk whispered to his wife as they walked into the living room.

“I figured that’d be the first place you’d look.”

“I couldn’t tell. Her arms were around my neck before I could get a look at her ring finger.”

“She’ll bring it up when she’s ready,” Angie told her husband. “Go visit while I start supper.”

“Do you need help?”

“No, just visit,” Angie patted her husband’s arm before leaving the room to go into the kitchen.

*~*~*~*~*

Supper was already completed and the dishes were drying in the strainer. Hawk was upstairs reading Ethan a bedtime story before tucking him in. Sarah sat in the living room with Angie making small talk.

“You know Hawk was speaking the truth earlier,” Angie said sitting in the recliner. Her hands were clasped around her belly where her fingers stroked it lovingly. It was second nature to her to touch her stomach and she rarely knew she was doing it. “About you moving here. We’d love to have you closer. Ethan adores you and we hardly get to see you.’

“I know,” Sarah sighed. “I want to move back here. I wish I could. But my job in Raleigh pays so good I’m still paying off my student loans. I’m almost done with them. It will be relief for me to have that burden gone. Five years out of school and I’m still paying on them.”

“I hear you,” Angie nodded knowingly. She was lucky to have a lot of scholarships to help her with school. With that knowledge she had already set up a fund for Ethan and as soon as she was armed with a social security number for the newest little one, she would go to the bank and set up another one. “Why not look for jobs around here? There’s gotta be some place that is hiring. You know you’re more than qualified for a lot of positions.”

“I know I have the attributes for a good job around here, but I don’t want to lose the tenure I have. Tenure speaks a lot. The first people that go are the lowest on the totem pole. And if I start a new job, I’ll be on the chopping block quick.”

“Well, we’ll keep our ears open if something pops up around here. We want you close.”

“Thanks,” Sarah smiled appreciatively. If a job fell her way in the town or a surrounding town, she would consider moving. But not only would a job need to fall on her lap, but a place to live as well. Living in Raleigh wasn’t bad as it could be. But there was no way she could afford to live smack dab in the middle of NASCAR country.

That was one of the bad things about the area. Being the center of everything NASCAR, it jacked up the prices from property all the way down to socks at the local Wal-Mart. It was a tourist magnet and Sarah tended to stay away during the month of May when Lowes’ Motor Speedway was the home of two races in a row and not to mention when every race shop held open houses and fan club functions. It was a mad house. During that time it was faster to walk than to drive a car. The bumper to bumper traffic could give Washington D.C. and New York City a run for its money.

Along with NASCAR personal, Mooresville was definitely not short on women. Women flocked from all over, with their tight skinny jeans, protruding chest and a hip shaking walk that would make Shakira jealous. Their fake smiles, high pitched giggles and surgical enhancements were enough to make Sarah want to run screaming for the West Coast.

The bottle blonde Barbies with ‘Daddy’s Princess’ tattooed on their credit card and little Mercedes, irked Sarah to no end. She went to college and acquired her bachelors and later her Masters with her own hard work and money. She didn’t have Daddy’s credit card to blow. Everything she had, she worked for. She was by no means living from paycheck to paycheck, but she gave herself a tight budget and for all her hard work, had a nice bank account to show for it.

Being from the area and having her brother work at JR Motorsports, she knew plenty of the drivers and it still boggled her why any woman would want to be with half of them. Why they followed them around like a lost puppy hoping they would be thrown a bone. It didn’t matter which who, because once you snagged one, it was easier to move up in the food chain.

“Alright, this is killing me,” Hawk said as he walked back into the room. “I have to know. I’ve been sitting with this information that you’ve had something to tell me know for a day and a half. I have to know.” He stood in the middle of the room staring at his sister with his arms folded. “You’re not getting married are you?” His eyes lowered to Sarah’s left hand which he noticed with relief, was empty.

“What?” Sarah stared up at her brother than to his wife. “You thought I was telling you I was getting married?”

“I don’t know what you wanted to tell me. Last time you did this, you married that asshole.” Hawk started pacing. If Sarah wasn’t getting married then it had to be something equally important. He racked his brain for ideas. He froze in his spot and whirled on his sister. “Something’s wrong isn’t it? When I called you last week you were on your way to the doctor’s office. You’re sick aren’t you?’ He didn’t wait for Sarah to response as he pushed on. “Mom was sick. They didn’t know until it was too late. She… Sarah?”

“Michael,” Angie looked at her husband. The mention of Michael and Sarah’s mother caught her off guard. Deborah had been diagnosed with breast cancer during Michael’s senior year of high school. She had died a short year later. It was one topic that Michael never liked to talk about.

Hawk sighed and rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair. Dropping his shoulders he looked at his sister. “Just tell me, Eyas.”

“I’m not sick, Hawk,” Sarah said softly. “I was going to the doctor for a scheduled appointment. A check up. I’m fine.”

Hawk relaxed hearing Sarah’s words. He didn’t want to think about his sister becoming sick. He didn’t want to think about all the tests, doctors and hospitals handing out false hope as she just becomes sicker and sicker until it hurts to even visit. And there were no more tears to cry.

“I’m sorry for worrying you,” Sarah said softly, memories of their mother’s sickness breaking through the barrier and a lump rose in her throat. A tear trailed slowly down her cheek. “I…”

“Oh Sweetie,” Angie got up from her seat and moved to sit beside Sarah on the couch. She put an arm around her shoulder, rubbing her forearm as Sarah leaned into her.

“I’m sorry,” Hawk made quick work of the distance between them and sat on the other side of his sister, his arm wrapping around her neck. He pulled her from Angie’s comforting arm up against his chest. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“It’s okay,” Sarah’s arm slipped around Hawk’s waist as she leaned against him. Her other hand wiped away the tears that fell from her eyes as she thought about her mother. “I’m okay. I just wasn’t expecting it. I’m sorry Hawk. I didn’t know you’d make that connection. I didn’t mean to worry you. I just wanted to talk to you in person.”

“What do you need to tell me, Sarah? You’re not getting married and you’re not sick. Anything else I can take.”

Sarah sat up, wiping the final stray tear from her cheek. “I’m gonna have a baby.”


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Hawk stared at his sister, frozen in place as the words washed over him. Pregnant. His sister was pregnant. His eyes darted down to the ringless finger then back to Sarah’s face where he met her gaze. “You… what?” He got up from the couch and resumed his earlier pacing.

“I… Wow,” Angie said filling in at her husband’s silence. “Definitely wasn’t expecting this.”

“Who is he?” Hawk said, interrupting his wife. He stopped pacing long enough to stare at his sister.

“Who is who?” Sarah asked.

“Don’t play games with me, Sis.” Hawk leveled. “Who is the bastard that knocked you up?”

“Michael!” Angie hissed.

“No, I have a right to know. Who is the low life, cock sucker that got my baby sister pregnant and then doesn’t have the decency to come with her to give the news?”

“Would you shut up so she can tell us!”

Sarah put her head in her hands, rubbing them over her face. She gave a sigh before looking back up at Hawk. “I’m not pregnant.”

“What?” Hawk furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He was now lost in what his sister was telling him. First she was pregnant and now she wasn’t.

“Sweetie,” Angie started softly. “I know Mike’s being rough right now, but he’s just upset. You can tell us the truth. He’ll calm down. You know how he is.”

Sarah nodded. She knew how he brother was which was why she didn’t think her news would go over too well with him. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m not pregnant, but I’m going to be. I want to have a baby.”

“So you’re not pregnant?” Hawk repeated. “But you want to be?” He rubbed his hands over his face much like Sarah had done a few minutes ago. “You’re gonna have to explain, Sis because I’m not following.”

“What I’m trying to say is I want to have a baby. I want to experience the joy and wonder of being a part of bringing a new life into this world. The late night feedings, the giggles and laughs. I want to do it all.”

“We can loan you baby Aaron when he’s born,” Hawk said.

“Baby Karli,” Angie automatically corrected. “When she’s born.”

“No,” Sarah said shaking her head. She stood up and walked around the living room. “That’s not what I want. I’m already the aunt. My job is to spoil and baby sit. I want to be the mother. I want to be a mom.”

“We understand that Sweetie,” Angie said. “But are you sure? Does… are you seeing someone?”

“No. I’m not seeing anyone, but that doesn’t matter.”

“Eyas, I know Mom talked with you about where babies come from.”

“I know where babies come from and I know how they are made, Hawk. I know I’m not seeing anyone and that’s just fine. I want to have a baby and I don’t need a man to do it.”

“So what are you going to do?” Angie tried to remain neutral. She wanted to hear Sarah out before she made her judgment.

“I’ve been doing a lot of research and talking with my doctor. It will take some money to do, but I have it saved up that’s not an issue. The closest sperm bank is in New York. I can either go there for the procedure or have the vials shipped to my doctor in Raleigh.”

Sarah looked from her brother to Angie waiting for them to say something. She knew it was going to be a shock for them to learn that she was gonna have such a procedure done. But it was the only way. She was tired of trying to find Mr. Right. She was sure now, that no such person existed. She was tired of seeing everyone she knew have babies. She was tired of being left out. She wanted to have a family of her own. She didn’t need a man to do it. The wonderful technology of today made that possible for her. She didn’t need a man, nor did she want one.

“A sperm bank?” Hawk repeated. “You…you want to go to a sperm bank?”

“Sweetie, have you thought about this?”

“Yes I’ve thought about this. I’ve talked with a lot of doctor’s, talked with people at the actual sperm bank. They’ve answered all my questions. I’ve been on community board sites and talked with people that have actually had this done.”

“You want to have a baby with a number?” Hawk said. He still couldn’t grasp what Sarah wanted to do and why. “You want to go to the doctor and search through paper after paper and files and finally pick one that you like the best.”

“Kind of like the real world. I search through millions of guys to date don’t I? Only this time, I don’t have to date them, get my heart broken. I don’t have to see them, they don’t have to know. I don’t have to worry about getting pregnant by a deadbeat father. It saves a lot of heartache for me and my child.”

“And how are you going to explain to your child when he’s old enough on why he doesn’t have a father?” Hawk had to talk her out of this idea. He had to make her see how stupid it was.

“I’ll tell him the truth,” Sarah brought her chin up stubbornly. “I wanted a baby and a family and couldn’t find the man I wanted. I will love this baby with all that I have and more. There are single parent homes where the children turn out just fine. Mine won’t be any different. You’re not going to change my mind, Hawk. It’s already made up. I just wanted to tell you and hopefully have your support.”

“I…” Hawk shook his head. He knew the stubborn set of Sarah’s head and knew her mind was made up. He could argue all he wanted but it would no him no good. “Are you sure?”

Sarah let a small smile escape. She knew Hawk was slipping. “Yes, I’m sure. I want a baby. I want to be a mom. I’m already thirty years old. I’m not getting any younger. I wanted to have at least two kids by now. It’s just… it wasn’t in the cards for me to have a man as well. I understand that. But that doesn’t mean I can’t have children.”

“People going through a mid-life crisis usually by an insanely fast car or date someone way younger than they are.”

“That’s what men do, Hawk.” Sarah grinned. “They by the fast car and an even faster woman.”

“Nothing wrong with that.” Hawk chuckled. He coughed and quickly wiped the laughter from his face seeing the look he was getting from his wife. “If you’re not married to a wonderful woman and have the perfect life like I do.”

“Yeah, nice save,” Angie rolled her eyes at her husband. “Well Sweetie, if this is what you want, what you truly want, then you have our support. I can’t wait for a niece or nephew to get here to spoil and pay you back for all the times you spoiled Ethan.”

“Oh thank you, Ang!” Sarah rushed toward her sister-in-law giving her a hug. She pulled back and turned toward Hawk and waited.

Hawk gave a sigh and rubbed his face again. He sent his sister a smile. He opened his arms when she stepped forward and gave her a hug. “You have to promise me one thing.”

“What’s that?” Sarah asked warily. What her brother wanted in return scared her.

“I want you to move here.” Hawk told her. “You’re gonna have a baby by yourself. I want you to move to Mooresville where you can be near so we can help and be there for you.”

“Hawk—”

“Sarah, don’t even start on the bullshit about your job,” Hawk cut her off. “You can get another one here. I’ll help you look, put out any feelers see if anyone is hiring.”

Sarah sighed giving in. “Alright, but I won’t move until I have a job lined up.”

“Any job?”

“One that mirrors what I’m making now or higher.” Sarah told him firmly. “You get me that, I’ll move as soon as I get a place to live.”

“Deal.”

*~*~*~*~*

Hawk pulled back the covers and crawled into bed next to his wife. He reached behind to turn off the light sitting on the bedside table, casting the room in darkness. Scooting toward the center on the mattress he wrapped his arms around Angie, pulling her back against him as they spooned together. He closed his eyes with a sigh and tried to fall asleep.

His eyes popped open a few minutes later. His mind was still working overtime after his sister’s visit. She had certainly left them reeling. He never would have thought that would have been the news she wanted to share with them. A baby, his sister wanted to have a baby. That wasn’t the bad part; but she wanted to forgo the relationship and finding a man and go straight to the baby. He wanted her to have a family. She deserved to find someone and be happy with as he had with Angie. She was courageous, he’d give her that. Tackling single parenting was not going to be easy. But he also thought she was stupid for wanting to be a single parent. To be both a mother and father with no one to rely on, to fall back on.

“Can’t sleep?” Angie said as she felt Hawk shuffling around behind her. She turned in his arms and when he moved to lie on his back, she laid her head on his chest.

“I want Sarah to be happy. I really do. But this? I don’t know if she really knows what she’s getting into.”

“She’s certainly thought a lot about it. She answered all of our questions. And it sounds simple enough. I never thought Sarah would be the one to do this though. I always figured she’d be the one to find that perfect man and settle down with a household full of children.”

“Me too,” Hawk agreed. He held Angie tighter to him as his fingers stroked her arm. “I wish for her to be happy, to find someone that she can share that child with. Not a number and a profile. Having a child is a special moment and she’s going to miss all that.”

“Cory messed her up more than we thought.”

“That mother fucker,” Hawk tensed hearing his ex brother-in-law’s name. “If I ever see him again, I’ll beat the shit out of him. I should have done it when I first met him. I knew he was trouble, but Sarah was happy… happier than I’ve seen her in a long time. I hoped he’d prove me wrong and be different.”

“Well he was certainly looking a little worse for wear at the lawyer’s office when they signed their divorce papers.” Angie smiled remembering the shock when Cary walked in bruised and battered. Someone had roughed him up good.

“I’d like to buy him a beer.” Hawk mumbled. He had ideas about making Cory look as he did in the lawyer’s office and was disappointed when someone beat him to the punch.

“Probably the husband or boyfriend of someone he cheated on Sarah with,” Angie yawned and snuggled closer to her husband. “Why not set her up with one of your friends or someone from the shop?”

Hawk was already shaking his head before Angie finished her sentence. “No. Absolutely not.”

“Why not? You know a bunch of single guys Hawk, there has to be someone.”

“Because I know them Ang. They are nothing but horn dogs that see how many chicks they can screw and toss aside. None of them are looking for a relationship.” Hawk told her. There was no way he’d ever hook up his baby sister with any of the guys he hung out with or ones that worked at the shop or that he knew from another shop. He knew how they all were; how they treated women.

“You don’t trust any of your friends?” Angie leaned up on her elbow staring down at Hawk with an eyebrow raised. “Out of all the guys you hang out with on a regular basis, there isn’t one whom you’d think would be good for Sarah?”

“What can I say; I hang out with a bunch of immature sex-crazed idiots.” Hawk pulled Angie back down to him. He kissed the side of her head, pulling the covers back up around them. “None of which are right for my sister.”


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

“How’d last night go?” Dale asked when Hawk came into his office that he shared with Kelley, during lunch. He hadn’t been able to speak to him before the afternoon hour. His morning had been filled with a competition meeting at Hendrick Motorsports and then talking with his crew chief Lance McGrew. “I didn’t get a phone call.”

“God,” Hawk slumped in the chair across from Dale’s desk. “Why are sisters pains in the asses?”

Dale laughed and shook his head. “No idea. So what happened?” He asked after awhile.

“If I ever see Cory again, I’ll make him wish he had never met Sarah.”

Dale blinked, surprised at the name mentioned. “What? Don’t tell me...” He shook his head. “Don’t tell me she’s getting back with that asshole?”

“Fuck no,” Hawk grunted. “That will never happen.”

“So what’s going on, Hawk? Am I gonna have to play twenty questions to get you to tell me what happened last night?”

Hawk sighed. “She wants to have a baby. But she doesn’t want to have a man or a relationship. She’s going to a sperm bank.”

Dale stared at Hawk as he digested the information. Sarah wanted to have a baby? She was going through a sperm bank. He started laughing. “You’re shitting me right?” He laughed harder. “Get the hell out of here Hawk. Now really. What did Sarah tell you last night?”

“I’m serious, June,” Hawk heaved a sigh as he sat up, his elbows on his knees. “She wants to have a baby and she’s going shopping at Sperm Bank NYC to do it. She’s gonna go through profiles on the fucking Internet and pick the right donor to father her baby.”

“You’re serious.” Dale stated, looking at his best friend. It was his turn to slump back in his chair. No way would he have ever thought Sarah wanted to have a baby without having a husband first. To him, Sarah had always seemed like the settle down family type. “Why? Why does she want to do that?”

“Said she’s tired of the heartache from relationships. She wants to be a mother.” Hawk told Dale the conversation that happened last night. “That son of a bitch Cory is behind this. If he hadn’t been such a bastard, Sarah wouldn’t be doing this. Ever since him, I don’t think she’s dated much. I’d like to rearrange his face. That still burns me that I never was able to. I bet hitting that bastard felt great.”

“It did,” Dale nodded, remembering. He closed his eyes with a curse when he saw the expression on Hawk’s face.

“You?” Hawk stared at Dale. “It was you? You beat the crap out of him?” Of all the people that had crossed his mind of who worked over Cory, Dale was never one of them. “Why?”

Dale shrugged his shoulders. He hadn’t meant to let it slip to Hawk that he had been the one to beat up Sarah’s ex husband. With the exception of Kelley, no one knew. And Kelley only knew because she had walked into his house as he was trying to clean up his hand. He had been lucky that he didn’t break any of his bones on the bastard’s face. It had been a busy week for him with appearances and the race on the other side of the country so he was able to avoid Hawk. By the time he had caught up with his friend, his knuckles had all but cleared up.

“Damn you,” Hawk muttered. “You know how bad I wanted to mess that mother fucker up? Why’d you have to go and jump in on my glory? It was my one chance to hit him without Sarah getting mad.”

“I’ll apologize for raining on your parade, but not for hitting him.” Dale said. He clenched his fists remembering the anger he felt seeing Cory at a bar in downtown Charlotte with a red headed woman; a pit lizard that he had seen at many of the race tracks trying to land a driver. When he caught them sneaking back into the restrooms, he hit the roof. He followed them back and caught Cory with his pants down. He didn’t remember what he had screamed at Cory as he hit him, but nothing felt better than his fist connecting with flesh. He got a few hits in for himself and then a couple for Sarah. 

When he was done, he leaned over Cory, grabbing him by the shirt, hoisting half his body from the bathroom floor. Glaring at the man he advised that if he didn’t tell Sarah about him cheating, the damage would be much worse. He didn’t know what had come over him or why he had stuck up for Sarah. After all she did have an older brother to do the job. The sight of her tears when she’d come to Hawk’s telling him that Cory was cheating on her had been his undoing. The tears streaking down her cheeks from her blue eyes were enough to squeeze the life out of him. He was happy the bastard wasn’t around anymore to hurt Sarah.

“Damn,” Hawk sighed watching the emotions filter across Dale’s face. “Now that’s what I want. I can tell you’re remembering how great it felt to hit him. Having him withering in pain. Damnit Dale. Thanks a lot. You should have called me.”

“Heh, we’d have killed him.” Dale said humorlessly. The truth spoken aloud wasn’t debated by the man across from him. He knew it was the truth too.

“No one would have missed the slimy asshole.” Hawk muttered. “God damned prick. And now because of him Sarah wants to get pregnant by a number. A damned number that does nothing but jack off into a cup all day for money.”

“Can’t you talk her out of it?” He shouldn’t care that Sarah was going to have a baby. It was her choice whether she wanted to go through a bank or a random man. But it bothered him.

“I tried. Angie tried. She’s set on having a baby. She wants to have a baby now. Hell I even offered her Aaron when he’s born. Turned me down flat.”

Dale smiled at that. “Still set it’s a boy, huh?”

“Hell yeah. I know it’s a boy.” Hawk grinned at the talk of his unborn child.

“The pool is up to five hundred that it’s a girl.” Dale mentioned the pool the shop had going. “Lot of guys think it’s going to be a girl.”

“Well I don’t trust any of them. I know my wife and I know she’s carrying a boy.”

“And when it pops out with an innie instead of an outtie?” Dale grinned.

“Fuck off. It’s a boy. So… can you do me a favor?”

“What’s that?” Dale asked.

“Call in a favor at Maggiano’s? Sarah is babysitting Ethan tonight and I want to take Angie somewhere nice.”

“This is a ploy to get Sarah to realize what she’s getting in to?”

Hawk scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Yeah right. She’s not gonna change her mind. She’s gonna do it.” He sighed. “The only good thing that’s coming out of this is she has to move back here. If she’s gonna have a baby on her own, I’d rather her do it where me and Angie will be there to help.”

“She’s moving back?” Dale asked surprised. Hawk and Angie had been trying to get Sarah to move back to Mooresville since they had Ethan. But every time they brought it up, Sarah rebutted their every move.

“If I find her a job,” Hawk said as he stood up. “Any other favors you could call in?” He asked with a smirk.

Dale laughed as Hawk walked from his office. He shook his head and stared down at the papers in front of him. His thoughts wandered to Sarah as he tapped his pen on his desk. ‘She wants to have a baby,’ he thought. ‘With a donor.’ The thought of her having a baby with a vial didn’t settle in his stomach. He didn’t like the fact that she wanted a baby with a number. She deserved to have a baby with a man who loved her and could give her everything she deserved. These thoughts were foreign to him and he didn’t understand them. It confused him.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

“Have a good time!’ Sarah called as she shut the door after Hawk and Angie. She turned around and sent a grin to her nephew. “Now it’s time to party. What do you want to do first?”

“Build a tent!” Ethan exclaimed and ran into the living room as fast as his little feet could carry him.

“Alright, we’ll build a tent.” Sarah said and went to the linen closet to grab extra blankets. Coming back into the living room, she helped Ethan remove the cushions from the couch and set them up. She moved the coffee table and end tables, along with the recliner. She brought in a couple of the dining room chairs.

Before long, the entire living room was draped with blankets. Underneath the draping housed different hiding places and tunnels. It was definitely a grade-A tent.

“Wow,” Ethan stared in awe. “Thanks Sarah!”

“No problems, Little Man!” Sarah grinned and watched as Ethan dropped to his hands and knees and crawled into the tent. Her heart swelled as she listened to the laughter and giggles from her nephew. This was how she wanted to spend her nights. She wanted a house and a big yard. The sounds of running feet through the house and shrieks of laughter echoing off the walls.

“Come on Sarah,” Ethan poked his head out from underneath the blanket. “Come in and play!”

“You’d better run!” Sarah grinned holding up her hands. She wiggled her fingers and laughed as she crouched down. Ethan shrieked and scampered back into the tent. “I’m gonna get you!”

Sarah crawled into the make shift tent and followed the sounds of giggles until she found Ethan. She caught his foot and pulled him back toward her, where she lightly ran her fingers over his socked foot. Ethan laughed as he kicked his feet trying to get away. She let his foot slip from her grasp allowing him to get away.

“Let’s play cops and robbers!” Ethan shouted as he crawled from the tent a few minutes later. “I’ll be the cop.”

“Alright,” Sarah stood up. “Let’s go find our costumes!” Ethan ran toward his room, with her following more slowly. When she appeared in the doorway he was already throwing his toys from his toy box in the midst of looking for the toys he wanted. She opened her mouth to tell him to clean up his mess, but she stopped. She decided to let him have fun and they’d pick it up later before bed.

“You need a mask!” Ethan exclaimed as he pulled out his toy badge, whistle and pop cap gun. “All robbers have masks over their face so they no one can see their face!”

“That’s right, I need a mask.” Sarah thought of what she could use to wrap around her face. Getting an idea, she left Ethan in his room and went down the hall to her brother’s room. Opening up the door, she turned on the light going to the closet where she sifted through Angie’s clothes until she found the scarves. On her way out, she grabbed one of Hawk’s JR Motorsports hats. 

She stopped at the mirror over the vanity and tied the scarf around her head so it was covering the lower half of her face and then put the hat low on her head, casting a shadow on her eyes. She grinned and went to find her nephew.

“That’s cool!” Ethan grinned up at his aunt seeing her outfit. “We need rope.”

“Why do we need rope?” Sarah asked.

“So I can tie you up. I can’t find my handcuffs.”

“Of course.” Sarah said. She went into the garage and searched through Hawk’s things for a rope. Finding a piece that would work perfectly, she went back inside where Ethan wanted it attached to him. After a few minutes she figured it out and soon had him wearing his badge, with the whistle around his neck and the rope hanging at his hip. She took a step back a smile on her lips. He looked absolutely adorable.

“Now move before I make you walk the plank!” Ethan said and poked the butt in her behind, forcing her to move forward.

“The plank?” Sarah asked with a raised eyebrow. She wondered how they got to be on a ship.

“Yes and you’ll jump into a pit that’s filled with snakes! And rats! And spiders!”

Sarah shivered at the mention of the rodents. She hated all three of them. “Oh I don’t want to walk the plank! I’ll do what you say.”

“Go into the tent!” Ethan said as he pushed her forward. He knelt to the ground and crawled in after her, directing Sarah toward the end table. “Now sit there and put your hands like this,” he put her hands where he wanted them and got his rope. He crawled behind her and started wrapping the ropes around her wrists and the end table. He stuck his tongue out as he tried to ‘tie’ his aunt up. He put one end up the rope through a loop and continued the movements until he was sure she was tied. “Guess what Sarah?”

“What?” Sarah asked. She watched as Ethan pulled the badge from his shirt.

“I’m not a cop. I’m a bad guy!” Ethan exclaimed. “And I just captured you!”

“Oh no!” Sarah moaned and hung her head. “You fooled me!”

Ethan laughed. “You’re my prisoner! I’ll break out of this town! No one will save you!”

The ringing of the door bell caught them both off guard. Ethan scampered from the tent with Sarah’s words telling him not to open the door following him. Sarah struggled to free herself from the ropes but she couldn’t. Ethan had knotted them so bad, she couldn’t get them untangled. She hoped whoever was at the door would be nice enough to untangle her. She strained to hear Ethan as he opened the front door.

“Uncle Dale!” Ethan shrieked when he opened the door to see Dale on his porch, holding the hand of his niece, Kennedy.

“Hey Bud,” Dale smiled down at the little boy. He had always been known as ‘uncle’ to Ethan. Angie and Hawk always referred to him as being Ethan’s uncle and Dale went along with it, not minding. He loved the boy.

“Come play with us,” Ethan grabbed Dale’s hand and pulled him into the house.

“Where is Sarah?” Dale asked as he stepped into the house, shutting the door behind him.

“She’s my prisoner!” Ethan grinned up at Dale. “I captured her and tied her up.”

“Cool!” Kennedy gasped as they entered the living room and she saw the tent. “Wow!” She sank down to her knees and quickly crawled underneath the blanket.

“Ethan?” Sarah called from beneath the tent. She pulled on the rope again, hoping it would give way, but it did nothing but dig into her wrists. She sighed. “Who was at the door, Sweetie?” She heard the giggles getting closer to her and she watched as a small figure crawling toward her. She scrunched her face trying to figure out who it was.

“Uncle Dale!” Ethan said. 

“And Kennedy,” Sarah finished once the doe-eyed brunette stop in front of her; a grin on her face. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Kennedy giggled.

“No!” Ethan shouted and quickly crawled into the tent. “You can’t save her!” He made his way toward his aunt and sighed with relief when he saw Sarah still tied up. “You can’t save her! You’re not allowed!”

“Ethan!” Sarah scolded the little boy. “Don’t be mean to Kennedy. She can play too. And with how you tied these, I don’t think she can get me free anyway.”

“Sorry,” Ethan mumbled. “You wanna go see my new truck! Sarah bought it for me! All the way from her house!”

“Ethan… no… wait…” Sarah called to no avail. Both kids crawled from the tent leaving her along. She sighed and pulled at the ropes again. She couldn’t lift the table leg up because she was tied higher up on the leg and the shelf blocked her from being able to slide the rope right down and off. “Dale?” She called resigned on asking the man for his help.

“Yeah?” Dale asked amused.

“Can you help me? I really am tied underneath here. I don’t know what Ethan did to this rope, but it’s doing its job.”

Dale chuckled and knelt down before crawling under the blanket. “Alright, hold on.” He crawled on the floor, his eyes adjusting to the darkness. A smile grew on his face when he saw her sitting on the floor with her hands behind her back. “Hey.” He said as he stopped in front of her.

“Hi,” Sarah said with a smile. “How have you been?” It had been a couple months since she’d seen the driver. The last time she had visited Hawk, Hawk had invited Dale over for supper.

“Good,” Dale said as he looked at her. He grinned. “Looks like you’re in a predicament.”

“Just a little,” Sarah said. “I don’t know what he did to the rope, but I can’t get out it. I think I just succeed in making it tighter. It’s digging into my wrists.”

“Let me see,” Dale said as he moved off to the side. He pushed Sarah slightly forward so he could see the rope. He whistled. “Wow. He really tied this good.”

“Great, I’ll be stuck here when Angie and Hawk get home,” Sarah sighed and leaned back against the table. “Not only have I trashed their living room, but I let myself get tied up by a four year old. Hawk will never let me live it down.”

Dale chuckled and shook his head. “Hold on,” he crawled back out of the tent and went into the kitchen. He heard the giggles and laughter floating down from Ethan’s room as he pulled a knife from the holder on the counter. When he crawled back into the tent he saw Sarah’s eyes widen. “My fingers aren’t that nimble to work those knots loose. I’m gonna have to cut the rope.”

“Oh God,” Sarah groaned and closed her eyes. She leaned forward as Dale scooted closer. She felt him pulling at the ropes working at it.

“Hey! What are you doing!” Ethan’s voice came from the living room. He soon appeared in front of Sarah, with Kennedy at his side.

“I’m rescuing the lady,” Dale said with a wink to Sarah. He worked his fingers between the rope and Sarah’s skin and slid the knife in and pulled up. The dull kitchen knife was having a hard time cutting through the rope.

“Uncle Dale is Prince Charming!” Ethan grinned at Sarah. “Isn’t that cool Sarah!”

“Yeah,” Ethan’s smile was infectious and Sarah smiled back at the little boy. “Very cool,” her gaze caught Dale’s and he winked at her causing her to blush.

“Who taught you how to tie?” Dale asked as he used the knife to saw through the ropes.

“Daddy!” Ethan said proudly.

“Remind me to kick his ass,” Sarah said under her breath drawing chuckles from Dale. The sound tickled her ears sending a small shiver running through her body. His touches were like whispers against her skin as he carefully worked the knife to cut away the rope. The situation was beginning to feel like something out of a storybook. Dale riding in, coming to her rescue, much like Prince Charming had done with Sleeping Beauty and Snow White. She gave a soft laugh as her thoughts strayed thinking Dale was Prince Charming.

Dale pulled on the knife and broke through the ropes. Once that was done, the ropes fell from Sarah’s wrists breaking her free. He pulled them from around the table leg and leaned back, grinning at Sarah. “You are free M’Lady.”

“My hero,” Sarah brought her arms around to her lap, rubbing her fingers against her wrists. Her arm muscles ached from being in the same position. “Thanks.”

“Now you have to kiss!” Kennedy said looking from her uncle to Sarah.

“Wh…what?” Sarah stuttered. Her face flamed and she avoided looking at Dale.

“When the Prince saves the Princess, he always kisses her,” Kennedy said.

“I…” Sarah didn’t know what to say. The four-year-old wanted her to kiss Dale. Dale; the man that was sitting so close to her, making her senses stand on ends, whose cologne was wafting through her nose making her weak. Her brother’s best friend, Dale. The final thought caused her to shake the feelings off the best she could. “Kennedy…” she started.

“Come on Sarah!” Ethan chimed in. “You have to.”

“Yes,” Kennedy nodded stubbornly. “On the lips.”

Sarah stole a glance at Dale and saw he was grinning. She wished he would have jumped in to put a stop to their pressure but she saw that he was going to be no help. Deciding it would be easier to just do it instead of arguing with toddlers, she licked her lips and leaned over. Her lips brushed against Dale’s.

Her eyes fluttered closed at contact. The blood pumped through her veins, causing a pounding in her ears. His lips were warm and soft beneath hers. They were much softer than she would have thought from him. The coarse hair of his beard tickled her chin and sent a shiver down her spin. She pulled back quickly before she wanted more. When the contact ended, she realized the lie she told herself. She already wanted more.

It was over and done with before Dale even had a chance to respond. His lips tingled and he could still feel her lips pressed against his as if they were still there. He turned his eyes on hers, but she avoided his gaze by looking down at her lap. He found himself wanting to reach out and pull her back to him. He wanted to kiss her again. Only this time, he wouldn’t be caught off guard and without an audience of toddlers.

“Sarah?” Ethan spoke up, looking at his aunt.

“Y…yes?” Sarah coughed, clearing her throat. She looked at her nephew, purposely ignoring Dale. 

“I’m hungry. Can we eat?”

“Sure,” Sarah smiled at Ethan and followed him from the tent.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Dale sat at his desk at JR Motorsports. He was staring at his schedule on the monitor of the computer, but the words were blurred in front of him. His mind was on last night and the kiss he shared with Sarah. The kiss had been on his mind from the moment it happened. He couldn’t shake the feeling he felt when her lips touched his; of how his body reacted or how he could still feel her lips pressed against his a day later.

It didn’t help matters at all that during the night his dreams were filled with the blonde haired woman. He dreamt coming home from the shop and finding his living room covered with blanketed tents. Much like Hawk’s living room was last night. The giggles and laughter were so vivid he swore they were real. He had knelt down on the floor and crawled into the tent following the sounds to where he found Sarah tied to the coffee table, smiling back at him. Next to her sat a grinning five-year-old boy with blue eyes, auburn hair and a crooked grin.

“Daddy!”

The shrieked was still etched in his brain and the weight of the boy on his arms when he had jumped on him.

“I captured Mommy! She’s my prisoner!” The boy grinned up at Dale. He leaned in close to his father’s ear. “I’ll tell you a secret,” he whispered loudly causing Sarah to chuckle. “Only you can save her.”

He grinned remembering the excited whispers and giggles as the boy, his son, watched him untie the knot in the rope that was holding Sarah to the coffee table. He could see the smile Sarah sent him when he pulled the last of the rope away and it warmed his heart.

“My hero,” Sarah gushed.

Only in his dream, Sarah hadn’t needed the urging of toddlers to kiss him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. He had woken up then to a face full of pillow. The pillow had been launched across the room in a short burst of anger when he realized it had all be a dream. He was alone in his bed; alone in his house.

He glanced at the clock in the bottom corner of the computer monitor and sighed. He wished it was time for him to leave. He wished he was at the track right now to where he could get into race mode and push Sarah to the back of his mind. She had no reason being in his head at all. She was his best friend’s sister.

‘Whose ex-husband you beat up.’ The voice in his head reminded him.

‘Fucker deserved everything he got,’ Dale thought. He had the opportunity to teach Cory a lesson. He didn’t have time to wait around for Hawk to get to the bar. He jumped at the chance to smash his fist into the cheating bastard’s face. It had never felt so good. He did not want to sit here and think of what it meant. He didn’t want any feelings to get caught up in it. He punched Cory because he deserved it, not because he had a ‘thing’ for Sarah.

He leaned back in the chair and stared at the ceiling. No matter how much he told his mind, it would not leave the topic alone. It was like a voice inside of his head chanting, ‘Sarah, Sarah, Sarah’, and wouldn’t stop until he did something about it. But what was he supposed to do about it? There was nothing for him to do. She kissed him because it was easier than to argue with two stubborn toddlers. It meant nothing to either of them. His body had probably overreacted. It had been awhile since he graced himself with a female companion.

This time, Dale sat up and looked at the calendar. He groaned aloud when he realized just how long it had been. How long it had been since his release came from something other than his hand. He stared at the dates again. “Has to be a mistake,” he told himself. But even looking at them again, it was true. 

“God,” he groaned and rubbed his hands over his face. This had to be the reason why his brain and body was taking the impure direction of Sarah. He didn’t feel anything for her; he just needed to get laid.

“You must have hightailed it out of Hawk’s last night before he got home,” Kelley said. She stood in the doorway, leaning one shoulder against the jam, her arms crossed. She watched her brother’s hands fall from his face to look at her.

“Was no hightailing it anywhere,” he told her. “We ate the pizza. We helped Sarah and Ethan pick up the mess. When it was Ethan’s bedtime, we left.”

“So where does kissing Sarah fit into all that?” Kelley grinned triumphantly when she saw Dale freeze.

“How do you know?”

“Come on,” Kelley walked into the office and took a seat in an empty chair. “I know everything. And it helps that Kennedy was right there when it happened. And Kennedy tells me everything.”

Dale gave a groan when he realized his sister was right. Kennedy was a blabbermouth. She would talk to anyone who would listen and tell them everything she knew. He wouldn’t be surprised if everyone in his family knew what had happened last night as well as her pre-school friends and teachers.

“What were you thinking?” Kelley asked.

“It didn’t mean anything. It was a quick kiss. A peck on the lips. It was easier to do it than to argue,” Dale shrugged nonchalantly. “It meant nothing.” The words didn’t settle well with him. He brushed off the feeling. ‘Yes,’ he thought. ‘He definitely needed to get laid.’

“Whatever you say Dale,” Kelley stood with a grin on her lips. “Good thing you’re not around this weekend.”

“And why is that?” Dale questioned staring at his sister.

“Because it’s bound to get back to Hawk that you kissed his sister and it’s probably best that you not be around when he finds out.” She laughed at the look on Dale’s face. She grabbed a folder from her desk across from Dale’s and left the office.

“Fuck,” Dale said. He hadn’t thought about what Hawk would do when he found had what had happened last night. His friend hadn’t sought him out yet so he was taking that as a good thing that Hawk didn’t know yet. But he knew it was only a matter of time before Hawk found out; especially if Ethan had told his father what went on.

He knew his best friend pretty good. Being friends as long as they had, it was bound to happen. He saw how Hawk got around the boys in high school and the guys outside of school that showed interest in his sister. Most of the callers never had a repeat date because Hawk would end up scaring them away. Of course, Dale was the same way when it had come to Kelley. It didn’t matter to him that his sister was older; Dale still took on the role to look out for his sister and weed out all the losers.

But this time, he wondered just what would happen to him if Hawk found out what went on in his living room. There were codes between guys; lines that were never crossed; never go out with a friend’s ex and never date their sister. Hawk teased Kelley all the time; it had been a growing thing for him for as long as he could remember. But he never went after her. He never crossed the barrier.

“Hey man.”

Dale looked up seeing Hawk walk into his office followed by TJ Majors and Tony Jr. He quickly pushed Sarah from his mind. The one thing he couldn’t do was think about Sarah in his bed while looking at the face of her brother.

“What’s up?” Dale nodded in hello.

“Let’s go to lunch, man,” Hawk said taking a seat in the chair Kelley had sat in a few minutes ago. Dale was thankful that Hawk hadn’t walked in on their conversation. “Kill time before you leave instead of sitting in this office by yourself.”

Deciding it would help get his mind off Sarah, Dale nodded. The guys left the shop jumped into Hawk’s Tahoe and headed into town for lunch. They piled in the booth taking about the track this weekend, the cars and the shop.

“You should come with us and hang out, Hawk,” TJ said as he took a drink from his sweet tea. “Been awhile since you’ve been to the track. Tell Angie that you’re needed this weekend.”

Hawk laughed at the younger man, shaking his head. “Are you kidding me? Lie to Angie? I can’t lie to her. She knows when I lie and then I end up sleeping on the couch for a week.” He reached for his glass of soda. “And a weekend drinking beer with you guys is not worth the torture of riding the couch.”

“You wouldn’t know what that’s like, TJ,” Tony Jr. chuckled. He and Hawk were the only married guys out of the friends. “You don’t do anything to piss off the old lady.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” Hawk agreed. “So, I hear you had an interesting evening last night?”

Dale stilled with the glass on his lips as he was about to take a drink. He stared over the rim at Hawk. His mind worked overtime as he tried to come up with reasonable excuses as to why he kissed Sarah last night. ‘She kissed you.’ Blaming it on Sarah would not work. Hawk would still be mad at him. “No,” he recovered, finally taking a drink. “Nothing interesting.”

“You’re a horrible liar, Junior,” Tony Jr. laughed. “Don’t ever get married. She’ll see right through you.”

The guys laughed and Dale gave a short chuckle as he tried to brush off his cousin’s statement. But the barb stung deep. His friends didn’t know how much he wanted to settle down. How he wanted to find the right woman that wanted him for him and not for his money or the notoriety. 

“Nothing happened at my house last night?”

“Other than untying Sarah,” Dale felt TJ’s and Tony Jr.’s eyes on him. “Which reminds me that I oughta kick your ass for teaching Ethan how to tie.”

Hawk laughed as the waitress came back with their orders and sat their plates in front of each of them. When she left, he spoke up, “Oh trust me; I got an earful from Sarah this morning. She was the one who let Ethan tie her up in the first place.”

Hearing Sarah’s name put the dream front and center in Dale’s mind again. He felt the heat of her lips against his. He quickly took a drink. “She’s lucky I stopped by or else she would have been tied up until you got home.”

“I would have left her there,” Hawk grinned as he dropped a French fry in his mouth. “Maybe taken a couple pictures for blackmail. Use that she got outsmarted by a four-year-old to talk her out of having a baby.”

TJ choked on the burger he was chewing at Hawk’s words. He reached for his drink and took a long gulp. “Whoa,” he said after he cleared his throat. “What are you talking about? Sarah’s having a baby? She’s pregnant?”

Hawk shook his head and informed the other two of what was going on. He knew Sarah would be upset with him that he told TJ and Tony Jr., but the four of them were the closest. Dale was by far closer to him than the other two, but he trusted them all.

Tony Jr. whistled when Hawk was done. “Damn, she’s taking on a lot. Does she know what she’s getting in to?”

“Says she does. She’s asked every question, researched it, and talked to a lot of people.”

“Reading about it and actually raising a child is a big difference.”

“I know it.” Tony Jr. agreed, having two children himself. “And she wants to do it alone?”

“She’s crazy,” TJ said, shaking his head. He saw the look Hawk gave him. “No offense.”

“She’s not crazy,” Hawk told them firmly. “She just… I don’t know. Clock’s ticking I guess. Angie said I should hook her up with one of the guys.”

“What?” Dale and TJ stared across the booth at their friend.

“Yeah,” Hawk shook his head. “Said I could play matchmaker. Out of everyone that I know, there should be someone I’d hook up my sister with.”

“I could bite the bullet and take one for the team,” TJ grinned. “What?” He asked at the glare Hawk gave him.

“You were at the bottom of the list.” Hawk said. “None of the horn dogs I hang around with are getting anywhere near my sister.”

“I’d make a great candidate,” TJ argued. “I mean look at me. I’m smart, sexy…” he broke off at the laughter from the table. “What? I am.”

“Yeah right,” Tony Jr. shook his head as he chuckled. “Whatever you tell yourself to get out of bed in the morning.”

“Well what about this guy,” TJ clapped Dale on the shoulder. “Out of all the guys you know, he surely would be at the top.”

Hawk shook his head rapidly. “No. Hell no. Dale is the last person I’d hook my sister up with. No way.”

“Damn,” TJ said looking from Hawk to Dale. “Least I was only at the bottom of the list. There is still a chance. You are just flat out denied.”

Dale shrugged carelessly. “I wasn’t in the running anyway.” He finished off his burger. Hawk’s rejection stinging more than it should have. He was glad that Hawk put that out there. He could get the ideas and thoughts about Sarah from his mind.

“Well it would be the perfect scenario,” TJ pressed as he picked at the French fries that were left on his plate. Seeing the confused expressions on his friends’ face he explained. “Well Dale can never have a girl at his side with all the back lash and crazy psycho girls out there. And who’s to say that girl is genuine anyway? Most are after money anyway.”

“Is there a point to this, Dr. Phil?” Hawk asked.

“Well Sarah wants a baby without the relationship. Dale can provide that without having to get tangled in female drama. A no strings attached deal. And another, Mr. Legacy here can pass everything down to an heir.” He glanced at his counterparts in the booth with him. “What?”

“No.”

“Yeah right.”

“Where do you come up with this shit?”

“Just comes to me,” TJ shrugged, putting the last French fry in his mouth.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

When Dale returned back in town following the weekend’s race in Dover, TJ’s idea was still on his mind. No matter how hard he tried to shake it, it was still front and center. The idea was absurd. There was no way he could father Sarah’s baby. There was no way he would be able to stand back and not have anything to do with his child’s life.

TJ had been right though. He wanted a family. He wanted to be able to come after a bad day at the track (and there had been plenty of them recently) and have running feet meet him at the door. Nothing could cure his day faster than that of tiny arms wrapping around his neck and toothy grins from blue eyed, red-headed kids.

The kids he wanted. The greatest feat he could accomplish was raising a son or daughter. And that was the easy part. Getting there was a lot harder. He was no where near close to achieving children. There was no one in his personal life that he looked upon to mother his child. The woman that flocked around him weren’t the type that he wanted to have a child with and most of them, didn’t want to have a child.

And from the looks of things, he wasn’t close to finding that woman. It had crossed his mind to raise a child on his own, but he figured his fans wouldn’t embrace the idea very easily. NASCAR was a family oriented sport. They expected people to marry and have kids and that wasn’t in his cards.

“Damnit TJ,” he grumbled as he sat on the couch in the brand new house that had been finished over the past off season. The house was big enough for a family. He wouldn’t come right out and say that’s why it was so big, but that was a part of it. The empty bedrooms could be filled with a son. The son that he could teach racing to that his father had taught him. Another filled with a little girl. He would teach her racing as well, he decided.

The closet in the master bedroom was damn-near half empty. It was definitely built with a second occupant in mind. There was really no reason for most of the stuff in his closet to be there, but it was better than looking at the emptiness.

He pushed his lengthy frame up from the l-shaped couch and went into the kitchen and grabbed a drink from the refrigerator. With a drink in hand he turned around and stared over the spotless kitchen and dining room. There wasn’t a thing out of place which resulted not to his housekeeping but to not being home a lot. Just once he would like to walk across his living room a step on a match box car or a Barbie shoe. He wanted to see toys strewn all over the floor; drawings posted on his fridge. He wanted his house to not be so clean, but lived in.

He made his way down to his basement where his online racing computers were set up. Taking a seat in the chair he fired up the computer - ready to turn laps in the car, anything to get his mind off the thoughts in his head. But even racing couldn’t take his mind off of family and babies and Sarah.

Other than family members, Sarah was the only woman he considered a close friend. She was one of the few women close to him that he had never had a sexual relationship with. Not that he hadn’t thought about it.

Sarah had always been Hawk’s little sister; the girl they tried to dodge and get away from. But she always seemed to want to hang out with them. Hawk found it annoying but he didn’t care. Dale was used to being around his sister Kelley, that having Sarah with them never bothered him at all. He was fine with it until Sarah started changing. She traded in her tomboy clothes in favor of body forming clothes. He could barely speak to her for a week after he saw her swimming at their pond in her bathing suit. The suit showing off a figure and body he had never seen before.

Little Eyas had been the only girl for awhile where he didn’t trip over himself trying to talk to. He felt natural, at ease with her. He figured it had to do with knowing her for her entire life. The pull to have a relationship with her had never been much. He chalked that up to Hawk. He did not want to betray Hawk. He had done a lot of stupid things when he was younger, but going behind Hawk’s back was never one of them.

Dale had never forgotten the March after he graduated. Hawk had knocked on the door of the place he shared with Kelley. There he shared the news that Hawk’s mother, Deborah, had died. Hawk crashed at his house for the rest of the day; numb and in shock. The next few weeks passed the Hawkins’ children by the same way.

Dale pulled a photo album from its place on the bookshelf. He turned through the pages until the three friends were older. He found a picture of he and Sarah that had been taken around the time Sarah’s mom had been diagnosed. Staring at it now, he wondered if Mrs. Hawkins’ had known about his feelings for her daughter.

The pictures fell off and got father between the dates taken. Mrs. Hawkins’ had been the picture taker. Once she died, the pictures went with her. Near one of the last pages was a picture of he and Hawk, flanking Sarah who was dressed in her blue cap and gown on the day she graduated high school. He smiled seeing the next picture of he and Sarah standing together. She had wrapped her arms around his waist hugging him tightly. They were both grinning toward the photographer – his mother.

_*Flashback*_

_“Little Eyas has finally graduated high school,” Hawk said as he pulled on his sister’s tassel._

_“We all knew she was going to graduate,” Dale said as he smiled at Sarah. They were gathered in front of Mooresville High School. The graduation ceremony had just ended a few minutes ago and the class of 1996 had flooded out into the courtyard with their friends, family and faculty. A few years prior, it had been he and Hawk standing there in their gowns. “Miss Straight-A’s over here.”_

_“Hawk’s just jealous because he’s never seen an A before,” Kelley laughed as she joined the group._

_“I have too! I got an A on the history project we did our senior year,” Hawk defended. It was common knowledge that he wasn’t the best at school. He never failed a class, but he had never pulled an A._

_“Because I did it,” Sarah grinned proudly. She raised her eyebrow when Hawk opened his mouth to say something._

_“I knew you cheated,” Dale laughed. He looked at Kelley, “How come you never did that for me?”_

_“I guess Sarah likes her brother more than me.”_

_“Not really. He paid me a hundred bucks,” Sarah said as the rest of her family finally made their way through the throngs of people to their little circle. It didn’t take long for the cameras to be brought out and everyone had to have their picture taken with her._

_Before the group made their way to the vehicles, Hawk had been talked into having his picture taken with his sister._

_“Pretend that you like her,” Sarah’s Aunt Linda said as she aimed her camera toward the siblings. She smiled seeing Hawk move closer to his sister and wrap an arm around her. She blinked back a tear thinking how proud her sister, Deborah, would have been today. “Great,” she said snapping a couple pictures and cleared her throat, not wanting to bring anyone down._

_“Alright, Junior, your turn,” Kelley said and pushed her brother to stand next to Sarah. She grinned triumphantly seeing the slight blush creeping up her brother’s neck._

_“Pretend that you like her,” Hawk mimicked his aunt._

_“I like him better than I like you,” Sarah stuck out her tongue at Hawk. “If Kelley would allow it, I’d switch brothers with her.”_

_“I don’t think so,” Kelley laughed. “Sorry Honey, you’re stuck with Hawk. And I feel for you, I really do.”_

_“Hey,” Hawk yelled. “There is nothing wrong with me. I’m a great guy!”_

_“Yeah,” Dale rolled his eyes. “Just remember, Eyas likes me more than she likes you,” he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled Sarah close to him. He grinned at Hawk when Sarah wrapped her arms around his middle and grinned toward the camera._

_*End flashback*_

Later that night had been Sarah’s graduation party at the Hawkins’. Gathered at the house were numerous family members, his mom and step-dad, Kelley, a few of Sarah’s friends from high school, some of Hawk’s friends and him. During the course of the get-together, Sarah had disappeared. No one had noticed, lost in their own conversations. He watched her get up from the table and walk into the house. When she failed to return, he went into the house, searching.

Searching the house proved useless and he went out back staring over the backyard. His eyes had landed on the tree house and he smiled and climbed up the steps. The tree house had gotten a lot of use from he and Hawk when they were younger. As he neared the top he heard the soft cries and his heart clenched when his head shot through the opening in the tree house floor, seeing Sarah sitting in the corner with her knees drawn to her chest.

He remembered pulling himself into the tree house and sitting down next to her. She raised her head, with tear filled eyes, looking at him. ‘I miss her,’ crossed her lips and he pulled her across the short space between them and into his arms where the flood gates opened again. He had held her while she cried, rubbing her back. He listened to her sobs, the short bursts of anger. He hated the fact that even four years later, the anger and sadness was still there; that she was still grieving the loss of her mother. And he thanked God at that moment that even though he didn’t have the most normal home life; both his parents were still alive.

Twelve years later he still wasn’t quite sure how it had happened. Sarah looked up at him and he wasn’t sure if it was the look in her eyes, the tear stains down her cheeks, but he leaned down and kissed her. His lips had met hers softly and his hand cupped her face brushing away the silent tears. He cradled her against him

He remembered the way she felt, the way she tasted as if it were yesterday. The way she clung to him and wouldn’t let him move away. There had been little doubt in his mind now that if Hawk hadn’t called for her out the back door, their kissing would have led to more. But be it as it may, Hawk’s voice bounding over the backyard had ripped them apart in lightning speed. And before he could climb the steps to the tree house, Dale sent Sarah down first. He followed a few minutes later after the coast was clear.

Staring down at the picture of the three of them together he looked at his best friend. Hawk had pretty much put his foot down at lunch when TJ laid out his idea. There was no way Hawk would ever let Dale go through with it. And if he knew the thoughts that were swirling around in his head, Hawk would surely kick his ass.

He slammed the photo album shut, but Sarah’s smiling face still stared up at him. The way she looked at him the night at Hawk’s when he freed her from Ethan’s tangled mess. He couldn’t help but wonder how it would be. What it would be like if he was able to give her the baby she desired. How it would feel coming home from the track and seeing Sarah standing in his house, pregnant, carrying his child. How he would feel getting the call that she was in labor. What would go through his mind in the delivery room seeing his child being brought into the world? When he got to the image of Sarah holding his newly born son and he leaning down to kiss them both he shook his head.

Sarah didn’t want any of that. She wanted a sperm donor. Someone to give her a baby then step away. She didn’t want someone walking into her house being the father. She didn’t want someone holding her hand through the delivery. She didn’t want the family that he desired. That should have stopped his thoughts then, but they kept swirling.

He wanted a family. He wanted everything he had described and so much more – so much more. But he was already thirty-four years old, people his age already had two or three kids, some had more. They had the loving wife, someone to share their life with. Guys his age were pulling up to houses with bikes and toys littering the front lawn. They were walking through the front door of their homes to shrieking kids, cartoons on the television and the smell of supper in the air. They were bending to hug and kiss their children and then pulling a woman to them kissing her softly.

He was no where near becoming the family man he wanted to be. No woman he had met gave him the vibe or the want to. He had enough time trying to sort through the gold digging pit lizards that most of the women he went out with never got as far as a relationship type thought in his mind. The thoughts have crossed his mind that there wasn’t a woman out there for him. There wasn’t a woman who could see passed the fame, notoriety, and fortune of Dale Earnhardt Jr., race car driver. They couldn’t see the man underneath; the shy, quiet and reserve Junior, who loved his family and played on the computer for too many hours.

But just because a woman wasn’t in his cards, did not mean a child wasn’t. If Sarah didn’t want a man in her life, he didn’t have to have a woman in his. It wasn’t the same though. Sarah wanted a baby but no man. He wanted a baby. Sarah wouldn’t want him in her life.

‘Sometimes, though, you have to take what is being offered,’ he thought. Here was his chance to pass on his genes; to bring a son or daughter into this world. It wasn’t under the circumstances he had ever envisioned for himself, but he didn’t know how many more opportunities would come in his direction. He would have plenty of women offering, but no one was as good as Sarah. Sweet, innocent Sarah, who he grew up with, knew him long before he became the household name. Sarah, who was smart, beautiful and played cops and robbers and made living rooms into tents; and made silly voices when giving bedtimes stories.

He sighed as the idea rolled through his head. He didn’t like it. He didn’t like the fact of stepping back. But he knew Sarah and he knew that she would never take his child and run. She would never demand dollar after dollar from him. She would never move across the country. Her family was in Mooresville, North Carolina. She would stay in the area. He would be able to watch his child grow, even at a distance. And being loosely in the Hawkins’ family, he would be at family events and dinners when his schedule allowed.

He wondered what everyone would think. What Kelley and his mother would say when they found out. What Hawk would say and ultimately what Sarah would say. As he thought about it, he realized that no one had to know. Sarah wanted a child and was going to go to a sperm bank to do so. There was nothing saying that he couldn’t be the donor.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Sarah drove through the gates leading to Dale’s house, her mind still working as to why Dale wanted to see her. It was confusing. They weren’t friends; weren’t as close as they were in their younger years. They were more of acquaintances now. Dale and Hawk were best friends. She was now considered a friend by default. She couldn’t remember the last time Dale had called her outright.

She drove across the bridge and came to his garage on the left and the go-kart track on the right. She remembered the last time she was at Dale’s house, everyone had gathered around the track. Hawk had jumped into a go-kart and raced against a few other guys from the shop.

The house stood in the distance and was a lot bigger than she thought. When she got closer, she saw it was completely different and only then did she remember Hawk talking about the new house Dale was building. Hawk had been excited to drive the bulldozer. 

She pulled in behind the red Silverado and turned her car off. She sat there in silence, the butterflies stirring in her stomach. ‘Nervous,’ she scoffed; like she was meeting Junior was the first time. As if she was a fan rather than someone who had known him her whole life. ‘As if you never kissed him.’

She blushed, her lips burning as she remembered the kiss they shared beneath the blankets in her brother’s living room with Kennedy and Ethan looking on. Now they were going to be alone. No one to interrupt them if they started kissing again. That was a problem; she didn’t know if she wanted to stop if they kissed again.

She grabbed her keys and climbed from her Chevy Malibu, stopping her thoughts from the direction they were going. The closer she got to the door, the harder her insides twisted. The time between the ringing the doorbell and when Dale answered were the longest minutes.

“Hi,” Sarah smiled nervously when Dale answered. His feet were bare, wranglers hung low on his waist and a black t-shirt was stretched across his chest. She gulped.

“Hey,” Dale returned her smile and moved aside, allowing her to enter his house, all the while wondering if it was a good idea. Since he hung up with her, he’d been arguing with himself. He didn’t know how many times he had picked up his phone intending to call her and tell her to forget about it. That it was the moment of insanity. But he couldn’t quite go through with it. He wanted a son. He wanted a daughter. He wanted to pass a part of himself on. He wanted a family. 

“Nice place,” Sarah said as she looked around. “Hawk said it was big, I didn’t believe him. Spared no expense, huh?”

“Heh,” Dale said as he motioned her inside. “I figured this is where I’m always going to live, might as well get everything I want now.”

“You decorate?”

“Does it look like I did?”

“Nope,” Sarah laughed, as Dale led her into the living room. She took a seat on the couch and will herself to relax. A smile grew on her lips when a black boxer came up to her. “Hey you,” she rubbed the dog’s ears, causing the canine to lie down and roll on its back. She laughed softly and obliged the dog, rubbing his stomach.

“Can I get you something to drink?” Dale offered, watching as she won over his dog.

“Sure, nothing alcoholic. I have to drive back,” she leaned back on the couch, looking around the room. She smiled seeing some photographs with Hawk. Killer, unhappy at the lack of attention, jumped up on the couch next to her. He stuck his head in her lap. “Your daddy missed your name by a mile,” she said, stroking him.

Dale walked back in with a can of Pepsi for each of them. He rolled his eyes seeing his boxer, his head lying in Sarah’s lap as her hand absently stroked him. “How’s Raleigh?”

“Good, good,” Sarah took the drink, smiled when she saw it was already opened. She loved Raleigh, loved the city, but she missed Mooresville. But Mooresville now, was a lot different than when she grew up. The city had manifested; more people moved in. Driving to Dale’s she enjoyed the peaceful quietness.

“When are you moving back?”

Sarah laughed. “Is this what this is about?” She explained when she saw the look of confusion cross Dale’s features. “Hawk couldn’t get me to come back so now he’s sent you to get me here?”

Dale chuckled and shook his head. “No your brother didn’t send me.” ‘And if he knew what I was thinking and doing right now, he’d kill me.’ He finished the sentence in his head.

Sarah believed him and rolled through the options in her mind as to why Dale invited her over. ‘The kiss,’ the voice in her head whispered. She coughed as the drink got caught in her throat. ‘That can’t be the reason,’ she thought as she took another drink. It was the only reason she could think of. ‘Maybe he thought you were going to make it more than what it was. It was just a kiss…’ Her eyes met his. “Dale about that kiss….”

Dale held up his hand, stopping her. “I had hoped we could have hung out and caught up before we talked about that. Mainly because I haven’t thought out everything I wanted to say.”

Sarah pursed her lips. He sounded serious. “Dale – if you’re worried about me taking that kiss the other night in any other way than what it really was, you don’t have to worry. I’ve already pushed it from my mind.” She saw him raise his eyebrows at her and she felt a blush creep up her cheeks.

Truth was the kiss was never far from her thoughts. It had uncovered memories of their first kiss many years earlier. If she had been eighteen again, she might have read more into it. She would have wished and waited and fantasized about Dale realizing and confessing his love for her, Sarah – Hawk’s little sister. 

“It doesn’t have to do with the kiss,” Dale told her.

“Alright,” Sarah said. “Then what is this about?”

Dale took a deep breath. He felt as if Sarah held everything to his future in her hands. “Hawk told me about how you want to have a baby…” he held up his hand when she opened her mouth. “Please wait and hear me out. You don’t want a man or a relationship and you’re going to a sperm bank.”

“So he wants you to talk me out of it?” She interrupted beginning to feel angry with her brother for telling Dale personal information. She wanted to leave right now and head down the road and lay into Hawk.

“No Sarah. This has nothing to do with Hawk. We tell each other a lot of things.” He wondered briefly how she’d take to the information that he’d been the one to beat up Cory. He realized that now wasn’t the time to get into that.

“Okay, but I reserve the right to give Hawk a piece of my mind later,” Sarah said. Next time she won’t be as forthcoming with something in her life as she had been.

Dale rubbed a hand through his hair and at the back of his neck and turned around. For a shy person, this was hard for him to talk about. Sarah must have realized how important this was for him. He felt her standing behind him.

“Dale?” Sarah placed a hand on his upper arm. She felt the heat from his arm and the muscle quiver beneath her touch. She waited silently for him to work through his mind. She knew he would tell her what was going on.

“I want to father your baby,” Dale blurted when he turned to face her. He watched the emotions flickering across her face and he silently cursed himself for the tact he didn’t use in telling her.

Sarah blinked in surprised, her jaw falling open as she stood in shock. Her first reaction was to laugh, but the look on Dale’s face. He was serious. He wanted to father her baby. He wanted to have -- she gulped and felt herself blush. Her mouth to speak, but nothing came. She didn’t know what to say. “I…Dale…”

“I know it sounds crazy. I said as much when I first heard the idea, but more I…”

“What!” Sarah’s eyes widened hearing Dale’s words. “This wasn’t your idea? Whose was it? How many people did Hawk tell? Did he hold a shop meeting?” She was angry now. She felt the tears pricking her eyes. “Did you guys all sit there and come up with a decision that you thought I should do? Like any of you, Hawk included, had a God damned choice in the matter?”

“Sarah—”

“Does he do it all the time? Every time I call or pop in for a visit, does he run to the shop the next day and pass along what’s going on?” She felt betrayed; hurt that Hawk would betray her trust. “Does he walk in with a smile on his face, ‘Guess what my sister is doing this time!’ And everyone gathers around for story time?”

“No, it’s not…”

“Did this one take the cake?” Sarah questioned, she felt a tear slid down her cheek and swiped angrily at it. “You guys sat around and had a good laugh at my expense. Did you guys laugh at going to a sperm bank? Poke jokes at each other about whom would get pick the most if they donated? Did you have a dick measuring contest and ‘man up’ to which one at the shop should to the honors of offering to father my baby? Did you pull the short straw? Is that why you’re doing this? You were the odd man out or is there some unwritten best friend code that states ‘best friend will provide a baby to the sister if said sister decided to be artificially inseminated?”

‘This is getting way out of hand,’ Dale thought as he let Sarah continue. He grew a little angry himself that she could think so little of his shop; that they would sit around sharing personal stories. That Hawk would gossip about her, spilling out their private family chatter.

“Do you and Hawk trade sister stories? He tells you what’s going on in my life and you in turn talk about Kelley?” Sarah’s voice rose. Her hands shook with anger. She turned away from him and walked toward the window looking out. “It would have to be. It’s the only thing you have in common. Hawk doesn’t talk about Angie, because you don’t have a wife. You don’t talk about all the bottle-blonde-Lake-Norman-whores because Hawk’s married and doesn’t mess around. So the only thing left is me and Kelley.”

“So what story did you tell Hawk about Kelley? Did Hawk laugh and poke fun? Did it top me wanting to have a baby and going to a place where men jack off into cups all day to get one?” 

Dale’s ego took a hit and his anger stewed. How she thought so little of Hawk and him to actually sit down and trade stories. “Sarah…”

“I bet that garnered a barrel of laughs. How many laughs did you get at my expense?” Sarah whirled on him, tears streamed down her face. The hurt was gripping her heart, squeezing it tighter. “Is it funny? That women go to sperm banks to pick a donor to have a baby with? Well it’s a wonder why!”

She started stabbing him in the chest with her finger. “Because it’s men,” poke, “like,” poke, “you!” Poke. “Men like you that sleep with bleach blonde bimbos. A different one every night.” Poke. “Small IQ with a big bust in your face and Daddy’s credit card in their back pocket. They drive expensive cars and prance around in skimpy clothing only after one thing – money. Money and the notoriety of hanging on the arm of someone like you; Mr. Big Time Race Car Driver.”

It was on the tip of his tongue to let her know when the last time he had sex. To tell her the last time he thought of having sex, it had been her blonde hair had been spread out across his pillow. He opened his mouth but Sarah continued on, her finger still poking him.

“Then when someone like me comes along,” poke. “There is no second look.” Poke. “Sometimes not even a first look. Because after having Daddy’s Princess, who wants someone like me;” poke. Poke. Poke. “And why would they!” Poke. “When they can have a twenty-something with a fake laugh, that doesn’t expect anything but sex and lavish presents.” Poke. “Someone who can still stomach all the alcohol and partying.” Poke. “Someone to be at their beck and call and not have to worry about a job because wow!” Poke. “Their daddy pays all their damn bills. So what the hell do they know about real life!”

He frowned at her words as she kept going on. His chest was beginning to hurt from her finger. He reached up and wrapped his hand around her finger. His eyes held her tear filled gaze. When she blinked a couple more tears spilled over and rolled down her cheeks. He held her finger tighter and wondered how they had gotten so off track and what caused Sarah to go into a rant about pit lizards. 

A picture flashed in his mind so quick he was hardly sure it was real. At the time he never had paid attention to the woman that Cory was leading into the bathroom. He had his sights set on the man himself. The woman jumped out in his mind and he understood. “Sarah…”

“Forget it.” Sarah dropped her gaze and pulled her finger from his grasp. She had no idea what she was doing; what had caused her to keep shooting off her mouth. The blush crept up her neck again and she turned away. After a few minutes of silence, she spoke up. “I’m sorry Dale. You didn’t deserve to be yelled at. Well you do. I can’t…I can’t believe…” she broke off again when she felt a fresh wave of tears. The thought of being the topic of discussion in a shop filled of men, where they laughed at her expense was too much. The tears slid down her cheeks and she covered her face with her hands.

“Jesus,” Dale’s heart constricted at her cries and he reached out. He placed a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and fell into his arms. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her against his chest, letting her cry. He rubbed his hands up and down her back. As he whispered comforting words in her ear, he kissed the side of her head.

Her tears subsided and she felt the heat between them; the hardness of his chest and the way his arms felt on her back; the light feathery touches from his hands. His soft words tickled against her ear, his voice sending shiver through her. Her head rest comfortably against his chest, over his heart. His breath whispered over her neck and she turned her head toward it. 

He placed a kiss at the corner of her mouth. A hand ran up her back and buried itself into her blonde hair, cradling the back of her head. He brushed a whisper of a kiss across her lips. He felt the slight shift in her stance as she leaned closer. He settled his lips on hers and she settled tighter in his embrace.

Sarah sighed contently, her hands pressing into his back, holding him to her. Her mouth parted beneath his and his tongue entered the moist cavern to stroke hers. 

He placed small kisses on her lips before he drew back and stared down at her upturned face with her eyes closed and lips slightly parted. He smiled, watching Sarah’s eyes open and focus on him. He still held her wrapped in his arms and he couldn’t help but think how great it felt. How good she fit against him. How right it felt.

Sarah stared up at Dale, her breathing slightly off kilter. The blood rushing through her veins pumped wildly in her ears. This hadn’t been a simple kiss like the one in Hawk’s living room. She was wrapped in his arms, pressed tightly against him. She felt the bulge against her hip and heat flooded to her center.

‘I want to father your baby.’ The words rushed back to her and she shook her head. “No,” she whispered and stepped away. His arms fell to his sides as he let her go. “I can’t… I… No…”

“Sarah,” he said as he watched her quickly grab her things. He yelled at himself for kissing her, scaring her. But he couldn’t help it. She was in his arms, snuggled perfectly against him. He had to kiss her again; needed to kiss her again.

“I have to go,” Sarah said quickly and without looking at Dale, rushed from the house.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

A week later, Sarah sat in the chairs at her terminal gate in Raleigh-Durham airport. She held her ticket firmly in her hand. The arrival destination jumping up at her: LaGuardia Airport. New York City.

The airport was crowded at the early morning hour and if this was any other flight, she would be sitting back and watching people. Watching people was one of her favorite things to do. To sit back, relax and try to guess where people were going, to wonder how some people could leave the house in the clothes they were wearing.

Her phone vibrated and jingled in her small shoulder backpack that held her iPod, a book and wallet. Just what she would need to keep her occupied on the flight. She slid the back from her shoulders and unzipped the compartment and dug out her phone. She glanced at the lit up LCD screen. ‘Hawk’ She hit the ignore button and stared at the screen, watching as he still rang in. She figured her voicemail had kicked on by now. She was surprised that it wasn’t full already.

It had been a week since she talked to Dale. A week since she talked to Hawk. She still felt the hurt, the betrayal for her brother. She couldn’t believe he would talk about her personal life in a shop full of guys. She didn’t want to be the butt of people’s jokes, what she did in her own time was her business, not a shop full of guys who didn’t understand. Would never understand what it would feel like to want a baby, a family so bad, but no way to achieve it. 

The men that worked with her brother didn’t understand. Most of the older gentlemen were married and had kids of their own. While the other crowd didn’t want to be married. They enjoyed playing the field, passing through the pit lizards that came their way in hopes of catching the eye of the boss. The guys didn’t matter, they were all the same.

The phone jingled again signaling a voicemail. It was one of many that Hawk had left on her phone. It was one of many that she had ignored. Maybe she was being unreasonable, but she wanted her space before she confronted her brother. She wondered if their relationship would ever be the same again. If they would be as close as they used to be.

As boarding to her flight started, her phone jingled with a text message. She glanced down seeing the message window.

“Please call me.”

It was from Hawk. She tucked her phone back into her bag and slung it back on her shoulder. And reached down picking up the duffle bag she had packed for her trip. Her trip to New York City wasn’t going to be a long one. Her appointment was later in the day and she planned on staying in town for two days before heading home. It would be back to work on Monday.

She handed her ticket to the stewardess and sent her a smile before walking down the terminal toward the plane. She felt the vibrations of her cell phone against her back and tried her best to ignore it. She quickly found her seat on the plane and stuffed her duffle bag into the overhead compartment. She settled in her seat with her shoulder bag in her lap. She stared out over the tarmac watching as another plane taxied into the terminal next to her.

The plane taxied down the run way and her stomach twisted in knots. She wasn’t afraid of flying; she loved to fly. She was afraid of what was to come. This was, hopefully, to be her last morning as a single person family. When she climbed onto her return flight home in two days, she would comforted by the fact that she would be carrying her very own baby.

‘If the procedure works,’ she shook her head, refusing to go in the direction her thoughts were taking her. She was going to be pregnant. When she walked into her apartment, she would be with child and in nine months, she would be welcoming a baby girl or boy into her life. She would no longer be alone.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Hawk growled in frustration and he slammed his thumb down on the ‘end call’ key on his cell phone. It was official. Sarah was ignoring him. He called at least once a day, sometimes leaving messages, sometimes he hung up without saying anything. He sent her numerous texts that went unanswered. He understand that she was busy with her job that she couldn’t pick up the phone and return his call, but a quick, simple text would have been sufficient.

He thought over the past week and the week before to where something could have gone wrong to make his sister upset with him. There had been nothing. Sure he was caught off guard about her baby news, but she couldn’t that against him; could she? He thought he had reacted well within reason.

He was shocked at first, but he listened and understood. When it was over, supported her decision, stood behind her. There wasn’t anything Sarah could do that he wouldn’t support her in. She was his baby sister and he wanted her to be happy. She deserved to be happy. So why was she mad at him?

He still didn’t have an answer when he called an hour later. Disgusted he walked from the shop floor and made his way up the stairs to Dale’s office. He knew his friend was in there, having slipped in earlier in the morning, finishing up a few things before the weekends race. Dale had been acting strange throughout the week as well. 

He walked into the office seeing both Dale and Kelley. “Why the hell are sisters pains in the asses?” He spouted before collapsing in a chair. “When I get a hold of Sarah, she’d wished Mom would have let me go through with the ‘For Sale’ sign I made when she was born.”

“Problems?” Kelley raised an eyebrow at Hark, her lips quirked in a smile. 

“Yes Goddamnit. Women need a damn handbook.”

“Men wouldn’t read it unless it was a picture book,” Kelley deadpanned causing Dale to chuckle.

“What a book that would be…” he grinned.

Kelley rolled her eyes at her brother. “And we wouldn’t be pains in the asses if we had been dealt a little better brother material.”

“Hey!”

“Sarah is not talking to me.” Hawk sighed. It hurt. More so than it would bother anyone else. But having Sarah not talking to him, hurt. They were close. “I’ve called, I’ve text. I’ve used Angie’s phone, I’ve used the shop phone. Hell I’ve used TJ’s phone. She will not pick up. I’ve called her at work, but she refuses to take my calls. I don’t understand it. What did I do?”

Kelley whistled. “Wow Hawk. You must have done something big.”

“But what? I’ve done nothing but think over the past week of what I could have did. Hell what I didn’t do, that would have made her mad at me. Angie had to tell me a million times that I didn’t miss her birthday.”

Dale sat behind his desk watching Hawk struggle. He wanted to open his mouth and tell his best friend what was going on with Sarah, why she was so upset with him; upset with them all. But in doing that he would have to go into a whole other topic he wasn’t willing to talk about. “I’m sure she’ll come around. Eyas can’t stay mad at you forever.”

“If she doesn’t call me soon, I’m going to Raleigh and camping at her place until she tells me what the hell is going on.”

Dale watched Hawk leave, going back down to the shop. He kept his gaze away from Kelley’s pointed stare and played around on the computer, pretending to be busy. He hoped she would go away and not question him, but he knew that was wishful thinking.

“What’s going on with Sarah?”

“I don’t know,” Dale said. It was half true. He didn’t know what was going on with Sarah. She was avoiding his calls too. “Some woman thing probably.”

“We only have those ‘woman things’ because of men,” Kelley smarted. “Did you do something to her? Oh God, you didn’t sleep with her did you?”

“What?” Dale faltered, completely flustered. In his mind, he had made love to Sarah countless of times. It was pathetic. He was a grown man, pining after a girl like it was high school again. “No I didn’t sleep with her. Look, she’s ignoring my calls too.” He said in hopes to get Kelley to stop asking questions, but no such luck.

“She’s not speaking to you either?” Kelley mused. “You’re hiding something from me Dale Jr. You know I’ll find out. I always do. You can’t keep anything from me.”

And this is where he always got into trouble. He did share things with his sister, but it came from being close. They counted on each other a lot growing up. He counted on her more during those younger years. He sighed. “Fine. I didn’t sleep with her. I just let something slip to her that I shouldn’t have let slip and she jumped to the wrong conclusion and now she’s pissed at me, at Hawk, at the whole damn shop.”

“So why not tell Hawk?” Kelley questioned, eyeing her brother. She nodded slowly as it donned on her. “That wasn’t all was it? You don’t want Hawk to know something or else you’d tell him what you know.”

“Kelley…”

Kelley smiled and grabbed a folder from his desk. “Your secret is safe with me, little brother. I know you have the hots for Sarah and I won’t tell Hawk.”

As his sister sauntered from the office he realized Hawk was right. Sisters are pains in the asses.

*~*~*~*~*

Sarah clutched the duffle bag tightly in her hand. She had hoped to check into a hotel before going to the clinic, but her plane ran into a small mechanical issue in Charlotte. She had a layover in the airport completely out of the way from New York, but it was supposed to be short and she stayed on the same plane. But after spending the extra time in Charlotte, she didn’t have time once she finally arrived in New York City.

She had taken a cab into the City toward Park Avenue. Once she climbed out, she had felt so alone. She wished someone had come with her. Angie would have come if she asked. Hawk would have too. She shook her head. She didn’t need someone to hold her hand. She was thirty years old. She could walk down the sidewalk in New York City toward the clinic. She would walk through the doors with her chin up and wait to be seen. She didn’t need a man to have a baby, she sure as heck didn’t need someone standing beside her to get pregnant.

With that thought in her mind she started down the side walk. The cab driver had pointed in her the right direction. Traffic was backed up, she thought that there might have been an accident, but her driver had explained. “Common city traffic,” he had said. Sarah believed it and she couldn’t imagine living here. 

The fast pace life of a city never suited her and if she could, she’d move from Raleigh in a heartbeat. She wanted the country life. The bumper to bumper traffic of New York City scared her enough. She waited at the crosswalk for the light to turn, a small gathering of people were around her She wondered where they were headed. Some had cell phones in their hands, their fingers flying over the keys. Others were sipping coffee from Starbucks cups. ‘No,’ she thought. ‘I don’t want to live here.’

When the light turned, the group made their way across the street. Everyone walked at a much faster pace than she did and by the time she had reached the other side, the group she had been standing with, were already well down the sidewalk on the other side. Knowing the building was just ahead, Sarah didn’t rush. She didn’t see the need too. She’d be rushing soon enough; chasing a toddler over the house, corralling him or her into a room and out of things.

Lost in thought, the tug on her bag didn’t register on it was too late. Her duffle bag was ripped from her grasped. By the time she felt the tug on her shoulder bag she tried to wrench away. “Hey! Give it back!” She yelled and held tight to both straps on her shoulders. “Give me my bag!” She wrestled harder with the unknown attacker. She caught sight of the flash of metal on his hip and saw the gun. Her eyes rose toward her assailant and didn’t have time to move away from the fist that was heading toward her face.

Stars exploded behind her eyes and the force of the punch made her stumble backward. She tasted the blood in her mouth. The attacker pushed her as he wrestled the bag from her body. She reached out trying to fit him off but she was light headed and felt herself tumbling to the ground. She put her arms out to catch her fall, but the attacker wrenched her arms when he grabbed the bag. She crashed to the ground face first.

She lay their stunned as she heard the shouts and yells. The attack had last no more than a couple minutes. Feet rushed past her and she glanced up with her blurred graze and saw her bag running down the sidewalk. It turned the corner and was gone.

“Ma’am, are you okay?”

Voices stood over her now and she didn’t know what to say. Tucked in the shoulder bag had been everything: her cell phone, cash, bank debit card, drivers’ license. She was stranded in New York City with no identification and no money. She was alone.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

Kelley leafed through the payroll checks, double checking to make sure everyone was paid the right amount. Once she verified the amount, she scrawled her signature across the bottom right corner of the check. When the check was signed, she stuffed it into the envelope. She didn’t mind this process twice a month, paychecks were important to her. But it would be much simpler if they had an actual accountant in the office.

They last accountant they had moved to Georgia after her husband got a job promotion. Since then, Kelley had been filling that role. Sometimes – she hated numbers. There were a lot of things that she needed to be doing instead of stuffing envelopes. And she wondered if they got an accountant if she could slip the word into the new employee that all payroll checks had to be signed by Dale. 

Kelley grinned as she stuffed another checked into its envelope. She couldn’t definitely see that happening. Dale would be sitting here signing checks and she could be knocking out other items on her to-do list.

She frowned glancing across the office to where her brother’s desk had sat empty. There was something bugging him but he had yet to tell her what it was, which was unusual. They always had a close relationship. He always came to her when something was wrong or he needed advice. She was his sounding board. He trusted her to give him straight up answers.

But something was bothering her baby brother. There was something on his mind that kept him occupied and zoned out. She wondered if he had anything to do with Sarah and the reason that the younger woman wasn’t currently talking to him or Hawk. She tapped her fingers across her desk, pausing in her work. She knew it had to take a lot to get Sarah this angry, to keep up the silent treatment for a whole week.

Judging by Hawk’s attitude, she presumed that he hadn’t being able to reach her today. She also knew from Dale’s demeanor that he knew a lot more to the story than he was letting on. What she didn’t know was how long she was going to wait for Dale to come to her, before she went to him.

The phone on Dale’s desk shrilled in the silent office startling Kelley. She shook her head and picked up her phone and dialed into Dale’s, answering his incoming call.

“JR Motorsports, this is Kelley speaking. How may I help you?”

“Kelley?” Sarah’s voice wavered when she heard the woman’s voice over the phone. “I… I’m sorry. I th…thought I c…called Dale’s number.” She griped the receiver in her hand and looked down at her lap. She tried to block out the sounds of the New York Precinct. The phones ringing, low murmurs of conversation, loud voices carrying across the room, angry suspects in handcuffs being hauled through the office made it feel as if she had stepped onto the set of Law and Order.

“You did. I just picked up his line. Are you alright?” She listened to the background noise trying to figure out what was going on. She knew from the sounds, that Sarah wasn’t in her office.

“I…” She drew her lip between her teeth as she felt it start to quiver. She winced, feeling tenderness surrounding her lip. Her attacker had only managed to connect on one punch, which she saw the swelling and the beginnings of bruising when a female officer had taken her into the ladies room to freshen up. 

But when he pushed her to the ground and trapped her hands behind her, she was unable to break her fall. Her face collided with the cement sidewalk. Her chin and the right side of her face was scrapped up and bruised as a result from her turning her head at the last minute to avoid her face actually hitting the cement. Her head had bounced off the sidewalk giving her not only the scrapes and bruising but a nice goose egg at her temple. She stared at herself in the mirror and wanted to cry.

“Are you okay, Sarah? Do you need me to get Hawk?” Kelley was now at full alert, giving her attention to Sarah. Something was not okay and she’d be damned if she was letting her hang up without getting answers.

“No!” Sarah shouted into the phone, causing the officer who took her report to look at her. “I mean, no. I don’t need Hawk.” She didn’t know why she called Dale. The officer let her use his phone to call someone and before she knew what she was doing, she had been dialing Dale’s number. 

“Sarah, honey, I know something is going on with you, Dale and Hawk,” Kelley told her honestly. “Hawk’s on a tear and if he doesn’t hear from you very soon, he’s heading to Raleigh. He has no idea what is going on; why you won’t talk to him.”

“He deserves it,” Sarah snapped, still feeling the anger inside her.

“He might, but he also deserves to know why you’re mad at him.”

“Dale can fill him in; they seem to talk about everything else they shouldn’t.” Her head pounded with a headache. She wanted Advil and her bed. But she could get neither now. She needed help. “Is Dale there? I…I need to talk to him. I… I need his help Kelley. I don’t want to talk to Hawk, he can’t know about this. Not because I’m mad at him, but he just can’t know. Promise me you won’t tell him I called, Kelley.” Her voice cracked at the end and she felt a tear roll down her cheek.

“I promise, Sarah.” Kelley’s eyebrows furled with confusion. “Sarah,” she paused. “Are you hurt? Did something happen?” She asked slowly, her mind running with everything that could have happened to Sarah and why she didn’t want Hawk to know.

“Please let me talk to Dale.”

“I’ll go and get him. Don’t hang up,” Kelley wavered a moment before sitting the receiver down on her desk. She pushed her chair back and quickly strode from her office in search of Dale.

She found him in the conference room with the door shut, where he sat behind a table signing a pile of posters. It further added to her case that something was eating at Dale. He normally signed those sitting at his desk, where they kept each other company, but now he was holed up by himself.

“Dale?” She asked, watching him glance up. “There’s a call for you,” she glanced behind her making sure there was no one around. “It’s Sarah.”

“Sarah?” Dale questioned and stood up. He grabbed his cell phone from the table and looked at the screen for a missed call, but it was empty. She hadn’t tried his cell first. Then he wondered why she’d call the office phone and why she’d call him before calling Hawk. He was pretty certain she wished both he and Hawk in the same cage with a hungry lion.

“There’s something wrong,” Kelley told him. “It sounds like she’s crying or trying not to. She doesn’t want Hawk to know she called.”

That brought Dale to a stop in the hallway and he looked at his sister. He had wanted to talk to Kelley, but he could never get the right words formed in his head to tell her. He didn’t even get the right words to tell Sarah. He didn’t want a repeat performance with Kelley. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” she gave a small shrug of her shoulders. “But I think something happened. She pleaded with me not to mention to him that she called. I think she’s in trouble. She said she needed your help.”

Dale started moving again and quickly walked down the hallway and into his office. He sat down in Kelley’s chair and snatched up the phone. “Eyas?”

Sarah slouched with relief when she heard Dale’s voice. The voice not only brought relief but a new set of tears. She wiped them away, bringing new ones when she touched her injuries.

“Sarah, what’s wrong?” Dale sat rigid in the office chair. He listened to the sniffling over the phone, his heart aching to sooth her; to comfort her; to hold her in his arms. “Where are you? Are you hurt? Do you need help? You have to talk to me.”

Kelley waited and watched silently. Her eyes never left her brother and she saw the emotions flickering across his face as he sought to find the answers to Sarah’s call. She saw them all: worry, fear, concern, confusion. There were all on his face, entwined with the biggest one of all: love.

“I need help. I’m stranded…”

“Did your car break down? Where at? We’ll come and get you.”

“I’m…I’m in New York Dale.”

Dale stilled hearing the city. The color fled from his face. He ignored Kelley’s persisting questions of what was going on, what did she say. New York City. Sarah was in New York. He knew the only reason she would be in New York was for the sperm bank. She had made the appointment and went, giving no consideration to his question. He felt as if someone punched him in the gut.

Kelley’s heart broke as she watched hurt wash across Dale’s face. The raw emotion tugging at hers and felt herself starting to tear up. She wondered if Dale knew he loved Sarah. And she wondered how long it had been going on. If Hawk knew. It began to open up why Sarah had been giving off the cold shoulder.

“New York?” Dale breathed.

“Yes. New York City, I’m sitting at the one-seven precinct. I was mugged. He got everything. I don’t have my clothes, my money, my phone…” she scrunched her eyes shut as she remembered seeing the glint of metal off the sunshine of the gun, he had attached to his waist. He could have easily have shot her and she wouldn’t be having this conversation. 

“Are you okay?” Dale recovered from his pain immediately. He felt a fresh wave of anger wash over him thinking of the person who attacked Sarah. “Were you hurt?”

“Just bumps and bruises,” Sarah told him, trying to hold strong. The worry she heard in his voice touched her heart. Talking to him, hearing his voice, having the connection of a simple phone line held her together. But it made her realize how bad she wanted to see him. “I…my flight isn’t until Saturday. He uhm, he got my plane ticket. I don’t have any identification. I’m stuck.”

Dale glanced at the clock on the wall, mentally adding up the hours. His plane was set to fly out in a couple hours, on its way to Dover for the weekends’ race. There was nothing planned for him until Friday, so he could fly to New York and take care of Sarah. If it was just him on his plane, he could do that, but a few others were flying with him. It was too late of a notice to tell them to jump on the Hendrick plane.

If he flew commercial, which was a hassle for him, he wouldn’t be able to get a flight for Sarah. She didn’t have ID to get past security. If he was in his personal plane, she wouldn’t need anything. But how was he supposed to get his plane to New York and Dover at the same time. 

“Dale?” Sarah questioned softly. The silence on the other end of the phone unnerved her. She had a feeling that Dale was going to tell her he couldn’t help. Which she should have expected when she called him. Why would he rearrange his busy schedule to help her out? “If you can’t help, it’s okay. I’ll call one of my friends and see if they can’t drive up and get me.”

“No, no.” Dale said. “Let me make a couple phone calls and I’ll call you back. What’s the number?” He listened to the muffled conversation as Sarah talked to the police officer. When she came back on, he copied the number down. “Okay. Just….just hold on okay? I’ll call you back.”

“Okay.”

And because she sounded scared, “Sarah? I will come and get you okay? I’ll be there.” He hung up the phone, his mind working for an answer. He needed to get to New York and fast.

“What’s going on?” Kelley asked reminding him that she was still in the room.

He looked up at her and the phone conversation fell from his lips. “It’s too long of a drive to go and pick her up. She doesn’t have any money for a ticket and if I got her one, she doesn’t have any ID to board.

“Make a detour,” Kelley said after a few moments. “You’re flying to Dover, stop in New York. You can pick up Sarah and fly to Dover. And have your plane bring her back.” Her eyes fell to the envelopes still sitting on her desk and let a curse word fall from her lips. They were supposed to be handed out already. “You need to hire an accountant.” She snatched up the box the checks were laying in. “Let me know what you decide.”

He sighed and rubbed his face before grabbing his cell phone and called his pilot.

*~*~*~*~*

Sarah accepted the receiver the Detective, Mitch Freedman, handed her. Her hand gripped the black phone, pressing it against her ear. “Hello?”

“Hey.”

The sounds of the precinct faded away at that one word. The word drifted through the line and wrapped around her, encasing her in a warm cocoon. “Hey,” she whispered back. 

“Are you okay?’”

Sarah felt the unexpected rise of tears and bit her lip. “I’m okay. I’d really like to go home and crawl into bed, throw the covers over my head and forget about today.”

Dale smiled at her words. “You will. Tonight.” He went on to explain what was going to happen.

“I’m going to Dover?” Sarah repeated. “Why?”

“Because we are leaving tonight to fly to Dover; we’re gonna stop in New York and pick you up and continue to the track. We can’t get you any commercial flights since you don’t have an ID, but you can get on my plane since it’s private.”

“What am I going to do in Dover all weekend?”

“Hang out in the motor coach. Relax, watch TV, movies. After the race, you’ll fly back with me and I’ll take you home.”

“Okay.” Sarah said. She never expected to be taking a trip to the race track. She assumed Dale would take her back to Raleigh, back to her apartment where she could start figuring out what to do about her credit cards and license and everything else she lost. “Thank you Dale.”

“I’ll see you soon.” He told her and said goodbye. He held the phone in his hand and sighed. 

“I hear there is a detour?” TJ said as he climbed on board and dropped down in his usual seat; his iPod in his hand, the ear buds already in his ears. “Going to New York. What’s up with that?”

“No idea,” Mike Davis, Dale’s Public Relations Rep for his company stated as he took his seat next to Dale. He glanced at his client, his mind working. “Is there anything that I need to know about? Something going to come out in National Enquirer?”

Dale scoffed, “They run enough stuff on me as it is. There is nothing you need to know. We’re stopping in New York for a short layover.” He said and he left it at that.

“Why?” TJ asked.

“Because the gas is cheaper, dipshit.”

As the plane taxied down the run way to take off for Dover, the only sound that could be heard in the cabin was TJ playing ‘Danger Zone’.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Dale said nothing when the plane landed and he’d gotten the clear to get off the plane. He climbed down the steps and walked toward the black crown vic. His heart raced when he saw the doors open. He didn’t pay attention to the man in the driver’s side; his eyes were watched Sarah as she emerged from the passenger seat.

He walked closer toward her and when she tilted her head up to look at him he saw her injuries. He swore when he saw her face. Her eye was swollen, the skin around it a nasty mixing shades of purple and black. Her lip was cracked and puffy. Small cuts and scrapes littered her chin, check and temple. Her clothes were ruffled and dirty, speckled with blood. “Son of a bitch,” he felt his spine straighten and his hand clenched into a fist and he felt utter hatred for the person who did this to Sarah.

“I’m okay, Dale,” Sarah told him as she watched his eyes flicker across her face, taking in her injuries. She saw his eyes darken in anger and she stared, her heart racing. “Dale?”

Dale’s eyes cleared when he shook his head, bringing Sarah back into focus. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah. The hospital gave me something for the pain, but not a whole lot they can do. I just have to wait for it to heal.”

He wanted to find the person responsible and show him a thing or two. He sighed, knowing that it wasn’t possible. According to the detective he had spoken with earlier, they had no leads. He took a step forward only to be stopped by her hand on his chest. He looked at her questioningly.

“Please don’t,” Sarah said. “I…I’m barely holding on here. If you hug me, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop crying.”

“Okay,” Dale nodded. “Let’s go. It’s not a long flight from here to Dover, so we’ll be at the track in no time. I brought you a bag of clothes and what not.”

“Thank you,” Sarah glanced beyond Dale and saw movement at the door on the plane. She saw two heads hanging out the door looking in their direction. She gulped, knowing at least two passengers on the plane; knowing that word was likely to get back to Hawk about this.

Dale looked over his shoulder and saw Mike and TJ standing at the door of the plane looking out at them. He rolled his eyes and looked back at Sarah. “I know you don’t want Hawk to find out… I’ll talk to them, okay?”

“Okay,” Sarah nodded.

They said goodbye to the detective, thanking him for staying with Sarah and allowing her to stay with him until Dale had arrived. The car drove away and she took a deep breath as they walked toward the plane. The closer they got to the plane, the closer she moved closer to Dale.

Mike and TJ both carried the same surprised expression as the woman got closer.

“Sarah?” TJ asked in shock as he stared at her.

“Hi TJ,” Sarah forced a smile out. “Mike.” She nodded to the older man.

“Jesus, what happened?” Mike asked as they moved back, allowing Dale and Sarah to moved aboard the plane.

“City initiation,” Sarah said and sat down in the seat that Dale pointed to. She released a sigh and closed her eyes. She opened them feeling the stares. “Please, not right now.”

“Leave her alone,” Dale said, “Sit down so we can take off.” He walked to the front of the plane to let his pilot know they were ready. When he returned to the back, Mike had moved his belongings from the seat next to Sarah and was now seated next to TJ across the aisle. He ignored the questioning looks and sat down next to Sarah. This was going to one interesting weekend.

*~*~*~*~*

The door closed behind her as she entered Dale’s motor coach. He stood outside with Mike talking in hushed hurried tones. She knew they were talking about her, but at the moment she didn’t care. She wanted to forget the last day of her life. The swirl of emotions she felt in the span of one day made her weak and she sank down on the couch.

Sarah wrapped her arms around her stomach as the tears welled in her eyes. Today was supposed to be a new day in her life. One of the happiest days in her life. This was supposed to be the beginning of the rest of her life. The moment where she would start the process of becoming a mother. And now she was sitting in Dover, Delaware, hiding from her brother and empty handed.

The tears spilled over her eye lids and slid down her cheeks. She tightened her arms around her empty mid section and knowing there was no possibility of life growing inside of her; she sobbed harder.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“What is going on?” Mike asked as he stopped Dale from going inside. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Nothing is going on.”

“Yeah, right. And we just stopped off in New York and picked up Sarah, who looks like she got the shit beat out of her, and come here like it was an every day occurrence.” Mike growled frustrated. “You need to talk to me Dale. You need to let me know what’s going on.”

“There is nothing going on,” Dale repeated. The look Mike sent him let Dale know that his PR wasn’t buying it. He sighed and leaned back against his coach, running a hand through his hair. “Sarah called at work asking me for help. She was mugged and assaulted while walking down the sidewalk. Whoever it was got away with everything she brought with her, even her suitcase full of clothes.”

“Why did she call you?”

Last week sprang into his mind and he heard his words asking to father her baby. His lips tingled as he recalled their kiss at Hawk’s house. The dream that haunted him since that night remerged. ‘Daddy!’ He heard the little boy’s voice in his head just as sure as he was running through the motor coach lot at Dover to meet him.

“Oh God,” Mike groaned as he watched his boss’s face. It was his turn to run a hand over his face and through his hair. “Jesus. How long has it been going on?”

“How long has what been going on?”

“You sleeping with Sarah?”

“I…I’m not sleeping with Sarah,” Dale stuttered. That was the truth. He was not sleeping with her. But he definitely couldn’t say that it wasn’t on his mind. “She doesn’t want Hawk to know.”

Mike shook his head, letting Dale’s statement go. He could see the truth in Dale’s face. “Hawk was going out of his mind this week because she’s not talking to him, how is she going to hide what happened? And I thought she wasn’t talking to you?”

Dale shrugged. “She wasn’t.” He turned around and pulled open the door. “Just keep your mouth shut about Sarah being here.” He said as he climbed inside of his coach.

He heard the cries immediately. The bag dropped to the floor and he rushed toward the couch where Sarah’s shoulders rocked with hard sobs. He sat down next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his body. Her cries pierced his soul and he tried his best to comfort her. He held her tight against him, rubbing her back reassuringly. He whispered words softly in her ear.

“Shhh…”Dale whispered. “It’s okay Sarah. It’s okay.” He continued comforting her. They had been in this position an awful lot recently. He held her tight and rocked her letting her cry her tears until they became hiccupping breaths. “You’re safe Eyas. No one is going to hurt you.” ‘I won’t let them,’ he added silently.

Sarah sniffled and relaxed her hands against Dale’s chest, releasing the grip she had on his shirt. He didn’t push her away and she took the opportunity to let him continue to hold her. His heart beat loudly in her ear and a stray tear rolled down her cheek. She moved to wipe it away and Dale caught her hand. He entwined their fingers together and held her hand.

She stayed silent as he leaned back against the couch, positioning her more firmly against him with one arm wrapped around her shoulders and the other clutching her hand. Questions filled her mind. Why they’ve ended up in this position numerous times recently. Why did she dial him without thinking of anyone else? Why being in his arms felt right.

“Dale,” she began.

“Shh,” he said, similar questions rolling through his head. His head told him to let her go; to remove her from his arms. But he couldn’t let go he needed to hold her; to comfort her as well as himself. “Just relax. Later,” he whispered, because right now, he just wanted to hold her.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Dale walked swiftly up the garage stairs after talking with a reporter. He knew more wanted a word with him, but he was in no mood to speak anymore. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what to do. Mike stayed in step with him during his fast pace walk back to his motor coach and he almost felt sorry for some of the comments he had just said to Jeff Gluck knowing that Mike was ultimately the one to ward bad press away. 

But after the race today, he had had enough. There was no way he could sugarcoat his running today. Ten laps down in thirtieth place. Horrible. Down right awful. There was simply nothing he could do with the car today. It wouldn’t turn. The wheels bounced too much. He never had enough grip. He was too loose. And he normally liked a loose race car, but he was wheelin’ the car as much as he could so not to wreck. There were times he wondered if he should have just made a hard right and put it into the wall. End the miserable day and go home.

But he didn’t. He held onto the wheel and kept logging laps. He couldn’t purposely wreck the car. He couldn’t do that to himself, to his team, and to his fans most importantly. They paid the money to come and see him race. And he almost felt sorry for them. Paying all that money to see him ride around in the back, getting lapped and in the way of the leaders.

He arrived at his motor coach and slide the door open with more force than he attended. He barreled up the steps, made the slight turn into the living room. He skidded to a stop seeing Sarah standing in front of the couch, the duffle bag he had brought sitting on the floor by her feet. Her hands had clenched into nervous fists as she stared at him with her eyes wide. No doubt scared by his entrance.

He couldn’t explain the feeling that came over him, seeing Sarah standing there waiting for him, ready to go. Some of his anger and disappointment faded looking at her. He walked across the room, his eyes never leaving hers and wrapped his arms around her. He pulled her against him, squeezing her tightly. When he felt her arms encircle his waist, he released a breath and closed his eyes, blocking out everything and anything but her.

Mike watched the scene in front of him unfold. He felt the shift in his boss the minute Dale had spotted Sarah and he knew in that moment, he ceased to exist in the room. The longer they continued to hug, he realized that he was intruding on a moment that he shouldn’t be. He had no idea what was going on between them. But whatever it was, it was calming down his driver more than he could at the moment. He turned around and quietly left the motor coach, giving Dale and Sarah their privacy.

“I’m sorry, Dale,” Sarah whispered; the roles reversed. She was the one providing comfort. “You did the best you could with what you had.”

Dale sighed and dropped his arms from her. She followed suit and he missed the warmth immediately. “I’m sick of that line. ‘You did the best you could.’ I finished thirtieth, ten laps down! I wasn’t even a factor at all today; I was the car in the way.”

Sarah opened her mouth, but closed it, deciding to let him vent.

“The car was a piece of shit, but that’s what it feels like every week. I’m struggling to hang on, keep it out of the fence and on the track and hoping for a top twenty finish. If I’m lucky – a top fifteen. While my teammates are going for wins and a shoe-in to finish in the top 5/10 every week.”

“I’m sick of all the questions. ‘When are you going to win again?’ ‘What’s wrong with your team?’ Don’t you think if I knew those answers we’d be winning these races?” Dale ran his hand over his face and back through his hair in a frustrated manner. “I don’t have the God-damned answers that everyone wants. I’m doing all I can do. And it’s not good enough. Maybe it won’t ever be. Maybe this is how it’s supposed to be. Subpar performances. Mediocre career.”

“Alright,” Sarah said sharply. “I was content to sit here and let you vent and get it off your chest, but I’m not going to allow you put yourself down. You are anything but mediocre and subpar. There are racers out there that would kill for your stats. Two championships, 18 career wins. A Daytona 500 Champion. Does that sound like mediocre?”

“You’re a damn better race car driver than what happened here today. You know that. Your fans know that. I know that,” his eyes seemed to stare deep into hers, causing her thoughts to vanish. She fought to remember what she wanted to say. “You had a bad race…a bad few races,” she amended seeing him about to open his mouth. “Everyone does. You’re going through a rough patch in your career. Everyone does that too. Look at Jeff Gordon. Jeff Burton. Mark Martin. They all hit rough patches and winless streaks. And they’ve come back.”

“It sucks, I know, to see your teammates doing so much better than you. But you can’t give up. Your team will click. All the pieces are there, Dale, they just aren’t in the right positions. And when that happens, you’ll be running top 5/top 10 every week and winning. You just have to keep fighting.”

“I feel like I’m barely hanging on,” Dale said honestly. With the constant questions, articles, bad luck and bad finishes, he felt like he was drowning. He was good at not letting stuff get to him. He was able to carry everything he needed to on his shoulders, but there were days it got too heavy.

“Well you can’t let go,” Sarah said, taking a step closer to him. “You have to keep fighting and know that one day, one weekend it will turn around and the past year will be behind you. You just can’t let it get you down. It’s okay to be upset when the weekend doesn’t go your way. But don’t ever start questioning your ability to drive a race car.”

“And when that day comes and you’re being interviewed after a top five place finish or even standing in victory lane,” she smiled up at him. “Don’t forget to thank me on TV for kicking your ass out of that self pity crap.”

Dale laughed and snagged his arm around her waist, pulling her into a hug. “When did you get so smart?”

“From doing all of Hawk’s homework,” Sarah laughed as she retuned his hug. When she leaned back, she saw him staring down at her. Her face flushed hot and she tingled where his body touched hers. She opened her mouth but her words were swallowed when he kissed her. Thought left her as she sank into his arms. Her hands pressed into his back, holding him against her.

Dale pulled away slightly, watching as her eyelids fluttered open. “Am I hurting you?” He asked softly. Her face was still littered with the same nastiness from Friday, the bruises and cuts on their way to healing, but needed more time. It was going to get even uglier before it finally started looking better.

Sarah pulled her arms from around his waist and rested them on his chest. Her gaze caught and held his blue eyes. Questions still swarmed through her head about what was happening with them and she realized that she could step away from him and break the moment. But her hands traveled up his chest and locked around his neck. 

Her right hand, on its own accord, broke its grasp with her left and brushed over the back of Dale’s head. Fingers moved to the side of his head and trailed down his cheek, following his beard. Her left hand followed suit until both her hands cupped either side of his bearded face.

Dale stood still, his arms locked around Sarah, holding her close to him. He held her eyes with him, allowing her to explore his face with her fingers. Her caresses were felt deep throughout him. He had to tapper the drifting thoughts of her touching him elsewhere. He didn’t want to ruin this moment. Her thumbs brushed over his lips and he kissed them. He watched her eyes drift close and felt the pull as her hands brought his lips back to hers.

“Are you ready…” TJ called as he climbed up the stairs. His words fell off and his eyes widened when he saw the scene in front of him. ‘Oh this not good,’ he thought.

Dale felt Sarah stiffen in his arms and he saw the panic in her eyes. He reluctant let his hands fall and she stepped away from him. “I’ll be out in a minute,” he told TJ without bothering to turn around and headed into the bedroom to change out of his firesuit.

“Wow,” TJ whistled, stuffing his hands in the pocket of his jeans as he rocked on his heels.

Sarah looked at him with wide eyes. “TJ, you can’t tell Hawk. You need to keep your mouth shut. You didn’t see that. I wasn’t here this weekend.” She pleaded with him.

“What happened in New York?” TJ asked.

“I was mugged before I could check into my hotel. He took everything I had on me: my duffle bag with my clothes and such, my cell phone, wallet, keys. He punched me once and then pushed me down and took off with my things. I was stranded with no money, phone or ID.”

“Why aren’t you talking to Hawk? Is it because of,” he nodded toward her and the bedroom where Dale was currently changing.

Sarah shook her head. “No it’s not. Please TJ, just don’t tell him.” It was in the back of her mind to give TJ a good talking too about his roll in the shop gossip talk, but right now it was more important to make sure he kept his mouth shut.

“I won’t tell him,” TJ said. “None of my business. But I hope you talk to him soon.”

Dale came out of the bedroom, dressed and ready to go. His eyes met Sarah’s and he could still see the panic ridden in their depths. He narrowed his eyes at TJ, causing the younger man to bring his arms up, palms out, shaking his head. Content that TJ wouldn’t spill the beans, he reached down and grabbed the duffle bag from the floor and slung it over his shoulders. “Let’s go,” he stated, he placed his hand on the small of Sarah’s back as he herded her from the motor coach and into the awaiting vehicle.

*~*~*~*~*

Dale climbed off the plane following Sarah down the stairs. The other passengers scattered toward their vehicles not sticking around. He led her to his SUV, tossing the duffle bag into the back seat. He turned around seeing Sarah standing behind him.

“I’ll drive you back to Raleigh,” Dale offered. 

“You have to be at the shop tomorrow,” Sarah told him, remembering hearing the conversation between Mike and Dale. After the rough showing at Dover, Rick Hendrick wanted to bring all the drivers and their crew chiefs into the shop for a meeting. Monday’s were usually a driver’s day off, but Rick felt they needed to do something fast.

“Well that’s all I have tomorrow. I’ll drive you back after the meeting.”

“Okay,” Sarah said, knowing that was the only feasible plan. She wasn’t going to make Dale drive her back tonight, even if he didn’t have a meeting. After racing all day, he should come home and relax, not jump on the road and do another three hours of driving to Raleigh and another three hours on the return drive.

He unlocked the door to his house and pushed it open before stepping back, allowing Sarah to enter. When he crossed the threshold he smiled seeing her kneeling down offering her affection to Killer and Stroker. The dogs soaked up the attention, not letting her stop.

“I guess I’ve been replaced,” he said as he stepped around Sarah and his dogs. He sat the duffle bag on the floor as he reached into his pockets and pulled out his keys, wallet and cell phone, tossing the items on the counter.

“Guess they just need some female love,” Sarah smiled as she scratched Killer’s ears before Stroker nuzzled his head in the way. She laughed, “I got two hands. No need to get pushy,” she reached up and showed Stroker the same love she was giving the black boxer.

‘They aren’t the only ones,’ Dale thought. He was painfully aware of how long it had been since he had some ‘female love’. It was never far from his mind, but he couldn’t bring himself to call up any of the women for a night of sex. Every time he thought about sex, Sarah was the woman he thought about. 

“I’ll show you where you can sleep. You can hang out here tomorrow. I don’t know how long this is going to last. You can take the SUV and go to the DMV. At least get your license.”

Sarah smiled up at him in thanks. She gave both dogs a final scratch before standing up. “Thanks. Just shoot me now. I hate the DMV.”

Dale laughed in understanding. The Department of Motor Vehicles was always packed no matter what time you walked in. The simplest of visits turned into an all day event. “I don’t envy you one bit.” He leaned down and grabbed the duffle bag with her clothes. “If you want to wash these, I’ll throw them in the washer. I got something you can wear to sleep in.”

“Thanks,” she and moved forward. Once she started walking, Killer stepped in front of her, sending her off balance. She saw Dale reach out for her and she fell into his arms. “Guess he wanted more lovin’.”

The laughter died on his lips when Sarah moved against him. His arms tightened around her, holding her against his body. Dale stared down at her, watching as she raised her head, her eyes catching his. He felt her hands gripping his forearms.

“Dale,” Sarah whispered, staring into his blue eyes. Her breath hitched when he pulled her close. The feelings she felt for him hadn’t wavered after spending the weekend with him. She licked her lips and saw his eyes darken. “I…”

Dale dipped his head down, pressing his lips to her. His arms tightened and his ran his tongue along her bottom lip. Sarah’s mouth opened in a sigh and his tongue entered her cavern, stroking hers. 

Sarah relaxed into him. She wound her arms around his neck. The fingers of her right hand ran through his red hair. Her left hand fingers splayed across his shoulder blades, pushing him against her. Her tongue matched his stroke for stroke. She felt herself be moved and be pushed up against the wall.

Dale pressed against her, letting her feel his excitement. He broke the kiss and lightly kissed the side of her face down to her neck and up to her ear. He ran his hands down her sides to her hips. His fingers hooked a belt loop on either side and pulled her tighter to him. He grinned against her neck, hearing a moan escape from her lips. He moved away from her neck and stared down at her. A soft smile on his lips as he watched her eyes flutter open.

Sarah opened her eyes and stared deep into Dale’s piercing blue ones. There was no mistaking the erection pressed against her, nor was there mistaking the desire she saw in his eyes. She swallowed the lump in her throat. Her heart pounded erratically in her chest and her breath came unevenly. She couldn’t deny her own desire. “Dale…”

“It’s just you and me tonight,” he whispered. He moved a hand up to her face, were he caressed her cheek with his knuckles. “Just Dale and Sarah, nothing else.” When he moved to take her hand, she gave no qualms. He grasped her hand tightly in his and led her to his bedroom.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

Sarah rolled over, burying her face into the pillow. She turned to her back and opened her eyes, starring at the ceiling. She realized she wasn’t in her bedroom. Memories flooded her head; Dale’s kisses, his fingers moving deftly over her body, bringing her to pleasure she had never felt before. She remembered his kisses over her body, the whispers in her ear.

A smile grew on her lips as she remembered feeling loved, cherished like she was the only woman he wanted. She remembered him sliding into her, how he fit perfectly against her – like they were carved from the same stone. He brought her to an ecstasy that she had never experienced. She wanted to capture the smile he produced when she opened her eyes afterward. It was his turn to moan her name as she focused solely on him – wanting him to forget about any other woman he had been with.

He had collapsed on her, breathing heavily. She didn’t mind – welcomed his weight upon her – sought it. When he moved from her she felt the loss immediately. The idea of a man grabbing a warm wash cloth was foreign to her. She always handled the clean up while her partner was passed out in bed. She laid still, her eyes following his movements as he lovingly moved the cloth against her most intimate part. 

When he returned, he slid beneath the covers. She was pleasantly surprised when he moved beside her, drawing her in his embrace. He had held her against him, one hand stoking her hair, the other running along her arm. She moved closer to him, craving his touch, his body heat. Her head rest on his shoulder, her arm thrown across his stomach. She felt his kiss pressed into her hair and closed her eyes.

Now lying in the middle of his bed, she wondered what she had been thinking. How could she have slept with Dale – her brother’s best friend? She had no idea how she could have been so weak in front of him.

She was glad he wasn’t here. It would give her time to pull herself together. They wouldn’t have the awkward morning after. By the time he returned from his meeting she would have cleared her head of any ideas of last night meaning anymore than what it was; two people reaching out to each other for comfort. She could not read more into it.

She sat up in bed and caught sight of the note on the bedside table with her two pain pill on top of it. She had momentarily forgotten about New York City and the pain. But seeing the two white capsules brought it all back. She picked up the pills and read Dale’s note. She smiled seeing his scrawl upon the paper. It hadn’t changed since school.

‘Sarah – I left the keys to the SUV and some cash on the counter. Please use it for whatever you need. You’re welcome to anything you want in the house. I put your clothes in the washer. Don’t know when I’ll be done. I’ll call you when I know for sure. Dale’

The note was simple. There was no declaration of love, no mention of last night. She admitted she felt a little hurt but she had no reason to. Last night was a one night stand that was it. Nothing else.

“I need to get busy,” she said out loud. She pushed the covers back and stood from the bed. She spotted the duffle bag she used from the weekend and opened the zipper. It was empty without the clothes she used the past couple days. She pulled out the bathroom items and walked into the bathroom.

She showered quickly trying to stare too long at Dale’s things in the shower. Once she stared at them, she imagined him standing in the shower; the hot water running over his body. The image flooded her mind and she cranked the water off and stepped out onto the bathroom rug and grabbed the towel hanging on the towel rack.

She dried off and walked back into the bedroom where she rifled through his dresser drawers looking for something to wear. It wasn’t much of an option to what she could wear, so she settled on just a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt. She went into his closet and pulled out a hoodie. It being the middle of May didn’t bother her as she pulled the article of clothing over her head.

When she was finished in the bathroom, she made her way to the kitchen, pulling her hair back into a messy bun as she went. She smiled seeing both dogs following her. She gave them both love before eying the keys and money on the counter. She shook her head at the amount of money lying there. 

Sarah grabbed the phone from its base and took an Amp from the refrigerator. With the items in hand, she walked into his office, sitting down at behind the desk and turned on Dale’s computer. Once online, she looked up the phone number to her bank and logged onto her account online. Seeing the numbers in each account she felt herself get sick. She wanted to cry for the loss of money. She printed out all her transactions from both her checking and savings while she waited on the phone with the bank to report her stolen card.

*~*~*~*~*

Hawk slammed his truck into park as he pulled into JR Motorsports that morning. There was nothing in the world that could calm his anger. He was fuming. He had spent all weekend camped inside Sarah’s apartment. She never showed. And each passing hour without hearing from her just added fuel into the fire. He didn’t know what he would do when his sister finally contacted him.

He wanted to throttle her. How dare she run off and ignore him for a week. How dare she put this kind of worry on him? How dare she scare him like this? 

He stalked into the shop letting the door slam behind him. He saw the looks in his direction but he ignored them. The anger rolled off of him as he got to work on the race car in front of him. Questions that were asked to him were answered with a grunt or another noncommittal word.

It didn’t take long before none of the guys in the shop spoke to him or tried to engage him in anyway. They worked silently next to him if need be but for the most part stayed away. That suited Hawk just as well. He didn’t want to make nice today. He wasn’t in a joking mood. He was in a highly violate state. And he knew that one wrong thing would make him snap. God help the person that broke him and anyone else in his way.

“Shouldn’t you be with your baby momma?”

Hawk looked up and saw TJ entering the shop. TJ’s girlfriend was due any day now. 

“She kicked me out of the house for a couple hours, said I was bothering her.” TJ said as the shop laughed. “What’s up?” He asked as he stopped next to Tony Jr., slapping him on the back.

“How’s Junior?” Tony Jr. asked. “That was a rough one yesterday.” He hated not being with his cousin anymore. They were supposed to be the driver-crew chief. They were supposed to be winning races and championships together. They were more than just work team, more than cousins; they were best friends. It tore him up to taken from Dale and he knew it wasn’t easier for the other man either. But he was happy that if he couldn’t work along side of Dale on Sunday’s, that he could work along side as a part owner of JR Motorsports.

“Whew,” TJ shook his head. “Race was bad. Didn’t help that he came down pit road thinking something was broke and it wasn’t. Just added more salt to the wound.”

“They not know what’s going on over there?” Tony Jr., grumbled.

TJ shook his head, “I don’t delve into the inner workings. I’m just his spotter. Mike said he was pretty upset after the race before I got down from the roof. I read his quotes he gave Gluck this morning,” he gave a low whistle. “But Sarah was able—”

Once the name slipped through TJ’s mouth the shop grew quiet. A wench clattered to the floor, ringing through the shop. Everyone held their breath, watching as Hawk straightened. They knew something bad was about to happen, but no one could make the move to step between Hawk and his intended target.

“Hawk, I—”

“Save it,” Hawk forced. His eyes narrowed into slits as he glared at TJ. “What were you going to say?”

“Hawk,” Tony Jr. started, stepping up next to TJ.

“Stay out of it,” Hawk said through his teeth. “What were you going to say, TJ. What was Sarah able to do?”

TJ swallowed. He wished the floor would open up and swallow him whole. The angriness from Hawk was nothing he was going to get from Dale once he found out. Hawk could beat him to a pulp since he worked out with the guys in the shop work-out room. But that strength didn’t compare to Dale’s glare and the words that would come.

“You better fucking tell me right now!” Hawk reached forward, grabbing TJ’s shirt twisting it as he brought the younger man closer to him.

“Hawk…”

He ignored the voices of reason from the surrounding shop guys he ignored the crowd that gathered around them. He focused solely on the man in front of him. The man that was hiding something. The man that knew about Sarah.

“Fine,” TJ said, seeing the furious look filling Hawk’s eyes. Maybe he had been wrong to assume that Dale would be worse. Because the look that Hawk was giving him right now, was no match for Dale’s. “We picked Sarah up in New York on Thursday on the way to Dover; she stayed with Dale and flew back with us last night.”

“What!”

The word came out in a metal hiss and TJ was pretty sure that he wasn’t going to be able to see the birth of his little girl. He kept his mouth shut about any of the other details. He was not going to be the one to spill.

“Sarah spent the weekend with Dale.” He said it more to himself than for anyone else’s benefit. “That fucking bastard,” he seethed. Dale had known the whole time where Sarah was and how she was doing and he didn’t tell him. He watched as he caught angry and worked up over his sister when he had the words. “That fucking bastard.”

He pushed TJ away from him barely registering as the man stumbled and fell into the side of the car. He turned around and stalked toward the door, ignoring the calls for him to come back. Nothing was stopping him this time. He jumped into his truck and headed toward Dale’s. He was about to get a rude awakening.

He pulled into the drive and parked outside of the house in the driveway. The SUV still sat outside. He slammed his door and walked to the front door. Each step he took, his anger grew. He pounded on the door before he took his keys and shoved Dale’s house key in the door knob. He shoved the door open with such a force it slammed against the wall behind it.

“Where are you, you fucking bastard!” He yelled stepping into the house. He watched as Killer and Stroker bounded toward him but he ignored their presence. “Dale, you better show your Goddamned face!”

He heard the creaking of a chair and he waited in anger for the person to come forth. When they did he felt as if someone punched him in the gut.

“Sarah?”


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

There was nothing that Dale wanted more than to go home and crawl back into the bed. The meeting at Hendrick Motorsports was long and uneventful. He didn’t have any answers as to why the team was running like they were and he never received any. He just got promises that it would be fixed and be turned around and they’d do better in Charlotte.

Before he headed home, he wanted to stop at the shop while was out. After he was done, he was heading home to where Sarah was waiting for him. He smiled at the thought as he remembered the night prior. The way she felt, the way she tasted, where she liked to be touch. He had learned all those places, the ones that made her sigh, shudder and shiver and the ones that made her moan. He had learned so much in that one night, but he knew there was so much more to learn about her. And he wanted to find out.

When he walked into the shop, he immediately picked up on the difference. The banter, laughter was gone. Something was definitely wrong. He scanned the faces of the guys that worked for him. No one met his gaze. He sought out Tony Jr. and went to him.

“What’s up?”

Tony Jr. looked at him in surprise. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my shop,” Dale said with a smile. “What’s going on?”

“Hawk hasn’t found you?”

“No,” Dale said slowly. “Why is Hawk looking for me?”

“He knows Dale. He knows that Sarah was with you all weekend,” Tony Jr. said. “What the hell were you thinking?” He asked in a lowered voice. “Hawk is pissed. He threw TJ against the car and stormed out.”

“Fuck,” Dale groaned. “God damnit. Where did he go?”

“To find you. TJ’s okay by the way. What the hell are you doing out on a Monday anyhow? Don’t you sleep the day away?”

“Fuck,” Dale broke into a run to his vehicle, leaving the shop behind. Everyone knew that Monday’s were his ‘days-off’. Meetings filled up his Tuesdays about the prior weekend’s race. The place where Hawk would look for him was at his house not knowing that meeting day had been changed this week. And the only person at his house was Sarah. “Fuck fuck fuck!” He muttered hitting his steering wheel in frustration as he tore out of the parking lot.

*~*~*~*~*

“Hawk.” Sarah said as she stared in shock seeing her brother’s form in front of her. ‘Not good. Not good!’ Her mind screamed at her. She could practically see the anger rolling off of him. “Hi.” She said, giving him a smile hoping to defuse his anger.

“Do not ‘hi’ me,” Hawk seethed, watching as Sarah walked into the room. He took in her appearance; wearing Dale’s clothes. That did him in; seeing his sister walking barefooted around Dale’s house in his clothes. “What the hell happened to your face? Who did this to you?”

“What are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here! What are you doing here!” Hawk yelled. “Why have you been ignoring me? Is this why? Because you’ve been sleeping with Dale? That the reason you couldn’t return any of my phone calls? I can’t believe it!” He didn’t wait for his sister to answer. “I can’t fucking believe it. You were sneaking behind my back to crawl in Dale’s bed. How long has this been going on? Huh? How long have you sunken down to the pit lizard level!”

“Who I sleep with is none of your business Michael! It never has been!” Sarah yelled back. “If I want to sleep with Dale I will! I’m thirty Goddamn years old. I do not need you telling me who the fuck I can have sex with!”

“What the hell happened to your face?” Hawk looked at the discolorations lining his sister’s face, with the busted lip and swollen eye. His angered soared knowing that someone had done a number on her. “Did Dale do this to you? I’ll fucking kill him. Where is he!”

“Fucking knock it off! I can’t believe you. Busting in here, spouting off over shit that isn’t of your concern.”

“When my baby sister sleeps with my best friend, that is my business, Sarah. Where the fuck is he!”

They both turned at the sound of the front door opening. When Dale came through the door, Hawk acted.

“You sonofabitch,” Hawk launched himself toward Dale, sending a right hook flying at Dale’s jaw. He watched as Dale stumbled back against the force. Caught off guard, Hawk was able to raise his first again. “You bastard.”

“Hawk!”

Dale ducked the second time when Hawk’s fist went flying. He sent his own fist into Hawk’s jaw and that was the start of it. They both went after each other with shear determination. Fists flew, some connected, and some didn’t. Flesh broke open and a nose cracked. Blood gushed, but neither paid attention. Their anger coming to head and spilling over.

“Stop it! Stop it right now!” Sarah yelled and tried to break the two apart. “God damnit stop!” She was no match for the two men, but she kept trying to get between them. She was pissed at them both, but she didn’t want them to beat each other up. At least not in front of her.

The sound of a car door slamming moved Sarah’s concentration to the front door. She watched as Kelley ran through. “Jesus Christ,” the older woman whispered before immediately jumping into the mix. “Dale Jr., fucking stop it right now. Let him go!”

Sarah let Kelley try to handle Dale and she went for her brother. “Damnit, Hawk stop!” She yelped when Hawk pushed her away.

Dale growled and broke Kelley’s slight hold, tackling Hawk to the ground, snapping when he saw Hawk push Sarah. They rolled around on the floor, trying to catch the upper hand. His dogs ran into the room, barking at them and tried to get in on the ‘fun’.

Kelley grabbed for the person onto of the shuffle and started pulling him off. She caught an elbow to the jaw, jarring her for a moment, but she gritted her teeth and continued pulling at the man. Sarah joined in and together they were able to pull Dale away from Hawk.

“You stop this shit right now,” Kelley glared at her brother as she backed him away. “What the hell has gotten into you!”

“Ask him,” Dale threw a hand out into Hawk’s direction. He brought the hand to his lip; touching it he drew his hand back and saw the blood.

“Like you don’t fucking know!” Hawk screamed at him, brushing off Sarah’s hold on his arm. “Does fuckin’ my sister ring a bell!”

Kelley blinked her eyes in surprised and looked at the other woman in the room, finally taking in her appearance. The injuries to her face caught her first and she assumed they were result of the phone call at the shop on Thursday. She looked at Dale.

“So what the fuck if I slept with him,” Sarah snapped. “I told you it wasn’t any of your fucking business who I sleep with. And if anyone has the right to be pissed right now it’s me.”

Kelley swallowed the new information as she eyed Dale. This was the last piece that she needed; that piece that Dale had been hiding from her. She was a little hurt that Dale hadn’t brought it up to her, told her about it. But judging by Hawk’s reaction to the news, she knew why he didn’t.

“This whole time, this whole fucking time you were talking about me behind my back. Running to the shop ready to spill at what Sarah was doing next. Gathering laughs from my life, at my expense. Tell me Hawk, did you enjoy yourself? Enjoy telling all my shortcomings and ideas? Did you have a ball poking fun at my dreams? Showing your caring and concerning front to me, but the minute I leave you run to the boys for laughs?”

“Sarah, what—”

“How much did this latest get? I know you told everyone about me wanting to have a baby. Did you sit around and laugh at how it was crazy and absurd? Just another one of Sarah’s insane ideas? Did you sit there, making a list at the guys you thought should have done the honors? Then of course being a bunch of guys you’d shoot each other down, poking fun at them, but ultimately making fun of me.”

“How dare you, Hawk. How dare you think it’s your place to tell anyone what I tell you!” Sarah stared at him; the anger faded a little as she let the hurt shine through. “I trusted you! I looked up to you, chasing after your love, respect, your belief in me. Here I thought I got that all along time ago. But I was wrong I never had it at all.”

“Sarah,” Dale stepped forward, the hurt he heard in her voice tore at his heart. He touched her arm, but she tore it from his gripe.

“No. No!” Sarah said, whirling on Dale. Her anger building again as she faced a different man. “You don’t get to comfort me! You couldn’t wait could you! You couldn’t wait to get to the shop and tell everyone what happened, could you! Couldn’t wait to tell everyone that you slept with Hawk’s sister. Another notch in the ole bed post! Did they enjoy it? Did you give them the play by play? Did you bump fists, get slaps on the back? Did you have a bet on it? When you would take me to bed? What was it up to? Was the baby deal a ploy? A ploy to get me to sleep with you?”

Dale felt the stares from both Hawk and Kelley, but he ignored them. He stared into Sarah’s eyes trying to convey to her what he really felt. She had to know that what she was saying wasn’t true. Last night was not just another notch in his bedpost. It was the real thing.

Sarah faltered her eyes shining with tears as she stared at Dale. “How could you hurt me like this? How could you do this to me? I trusted you. Both of you.” She looked at Hawk. “I trusted both of you and this is how you repay me? I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust you guys again. Not after this. Not after you hurt me like this.” 

Realizing she was stuck with no vehicle, she turned toward Kelley with pleading eyes. “Please take me back home?”

Kelley nodded and watched as Sarah made a beeline for the door, not even bothering to put on her shoes. She just picked them up and walked out the door. Kelley turned back at the two men standing silently in the room. “I don’t think I have ever been disappointed this much in both of you before.” She turned around and walked out to the SUV, climbing in.

She stared at Sarah curled in the front seat, her eyes closed. A tear slipped down Sarah’s cheek onto the hoodie she wore. Kelley’s heart broke for the parties involved and wished there was something she could do. Deciding the only thing she was able to help with was taking Sarah back home, she started the SUV and pulled away from her brother’s house.

The door shut behind Kelley as she walked out after Sarah, leaving Dale and Hawk standing by alone. Sarah’s words weighing heavily on their shoulders. The silence was deafening. Dale turned to Hawk, staring at his best friend. The blood had dried on his face dripping down from his nose, soaking into the dark fabric of the JRM work shirt. The top buttons of the shirt ripped off, revealing the white undershirt. The white shirt showed the blood more drastically.

“Hawk,” Dale started.

“Save it,” Hawk clipped, erasing his gaze of any emotion other than anger. “Never thought a girl would come between us.” He walked passed Dale toward the door, his footsteps echoing across the floor.

“Hawk.”

“I quit.” Hawk said as he slammed the door behind him. He jumped into his truck and tore out of Dale’s driveway; twenty-five years of friendship gone.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

Hours later, Kelley pulled into Sarah’s apartment complex. After a quick trip to the manager she was armed with a replacement key and the promise of new locks on her door the next day. Kelley followed unsure if she was welcome, but she had questions of her own and she needed answers before she went back and faced Dale.

She watched as Sarah unlocked her door and entered the apartment. She followed suit, her eyes never leaving the younger woman. She watched Sarah walk into the living room.

Sarah stood at the entertainment center fingering the prominent frame that stood in the middle. Her and Hawk. She picked the frame up in her hands, staring down at them, smiling for the camera on Hawk’s thirtieth birthday party. Her lip quivered and she raised her hands and smashed the frame to the floor. The glass shattered against the floor.

Kelley stared in silence as Sarah broke the picture frame. She turned and went into the kitchen to find them something to drink. She grabbed her phone from her purse and sent a quick message to Mike telling him to check on Dale. She found a bottle of wine and opened it, pouring it into two glasses.

When she moved back to the living room, she found Sarah sitting on the couch. She passed her the glass of wine and took a seat next to her. She took a sip and waited for Sarah to talk.

“I was saving this wine,” Sarah said after a few minutes of silence. She stared at the wine in her glass, swirling it around. “It’s stupid really.”

“I’m sorry Sarah, I didn’t know.” Kelley immediately felt bad for opening up the bottle that was obviously meant for something.

“It’s okay,” she tried to pass off a smile but failed. “I bought this wine a few weeks ago when I decided to have a baby. When I finally became pregnant, I was going to open it up and make a toast to a new beginning. But I guess it’s partially right.” A new wave of tears welled in her eyes.

“I didn’t know you were seeing someone,” Kelley said cautiously.

“I’m not. I decided that I wanted a baby and I didn’t need a man to do it. I was going to get artificial inseminated.” If Kelley was surprised she didn’t show it. If anything a look of understanding crossed her features. “Of course you would know, everyone knows about it.”

“Sweetie, I didn’t know anything about it,” Kelley reassured Sarah. “Hawk talks about you to me, sure. But I only get how you’re doing, when you’re coming to visit and how he wishes you lived closer.”

Kelley sounded sincere and Sarah found herself believing. Just because Kelley didn’t know, didn’t mean that Hawk still didn’t talk about her in the shop. It just didn’t reach the offices. “I had enough money for the procedure. Angie and,” she swallowed hard. “Hawk they are wary at first, but came around and backed me. It was good. I needed – wanted- their support. They even blackmailed me,” she gave a small chuckle. “If I became pregnant I had to move back home so they could help out. God, how stupid was I?”

“Not stupid at all,” Kelley rubbed Sarah’s back. “You’re not stupid. You wanted to have a baby. I for one can understand that. Any mother understands another woman’s needs to have a child. I think what you decided to do is a very brave and tough thing. Being a single mother. But you’re strong.”

“I thought I was, that was before my support system fell out from under me,” Sarah took a sip of her wine.

“How did you find out that Hawk was talking about you at the shop?” Kelley treaded lightly. She needed to find out all she could. The more she knew the more she would be able to help her brother and even Sarah. She tried to think about gossip she heard in the shop, but she never recalled hearing about Sarah.

“Dale,” she cleared her throat not sure if she should be talking about him. “Dale told me.”

“And that was the reason for the silent treatment on Hawk.” Kelley stated nodding in understanding as the light bulb clicked. “What about Dale? He said you weren’t talking to him either.” She waited for Sarah to talk, but the younger woman didn’t say anything, just continued sipping her wine. “Sarah, listen to me. I’m not against you. You’re my friend. I want to help you.”

“I don’t know if Dale wants…” she sighed. She shouldn’t care about what Dale wants. She should be able to spill everything he offered, everything they talked about. He used her, broke her trust. He broke her heart.

“You don’t have to tell me everything if you don’t feel comfortable,” Kelley said watching the emotions going across Sarah’s face. Almost the same emotions that went across Dale’s face the day of the phone call. “Sarah, I want you to know this, whatever went on between you and Dale he hasn’t told me anything.”

“When he told me about Hawk talking about me,” Sarah whispered. “That’s how I found out. He brought up that he knew I wanted to have a baby. Kelley he… he… he offered to be the father.”

Kelley’s eyes widened and she coughed as the wine she had just taken a sip of went down the wrong pipe. She didn’t know what she had been expecting, but that was not on the list. Dale had offered to father Sarah’s baby. “Wow…” she breathed once she stopped coughing.

It was then it clicked into her mind that that was the piece Dale had been hiding from her. That was the piece of information he couldn’t tell Hawk about. If he had mentioned why Sarah was upset with Hawk, he would have had to explain why he was talking about babies with his sister.

“I thought it was a joke, but he was so serious. So… God. And then he said it wasn’t his idea,” the tears fell down her cheeks as she remembered his words. “I thought he was serious that he meant it. And then he said it wasn’t his idea. How could he do that to me?”

‘I’m gonna kill him,’ Kelley thought as she took Sarah into her arms, trying to comfort her. ‘I’m gonna kill him.’ She couldn’t believe her brother should be so insensitive. “I’m sorry Sarah. If he was here right now, I’d give him a piece of my mind. I can’t believe he’d do that.”

“That’s how I found out that the guys talk about me. I was so hurt. How could Hawk do that? I don’t want everyone at the shop knowing my personal business. Now they all know that I want a baby and I’m going to a sperm bank.”

“Sarah? Did you sleep with my brother?”

Sarah blushed and looked down at her hands. She nodded. “Last night,” she whispered. “We had kissed a couple times before. Once when I was babysitting Ethan and again the night he told me he wanted to father my baby. Once in Dover…You don’t look surprised.”

“Kennedy told me about the kiss,” Kelley smiled. “She can’t keep a secret. She told me how Prince Uncle Junior saved Princess Sarah. Dale told me what happened in New York.”

“It was awful,” she said and recalled the events for Kelley. “I was never so happy to see Dale get off the plane to get me. Once we arrived, I spent the rest of the night crying. I’m surprised I didn’t scare him away. Men usually run at the sign of tears or not know what to do.”

“Dale didn’t,” Kelley smiled knowingly.

“No,” Sarah allowed herself to smile, remembering. “No, he sat next to me and held me; allowing me to cry until I couldn’t cry no more. It was very comforting.”

“Is that when you kissed?” Kelley felt like she was fourteen years old again at a sleepover dishing on which boys were the cutest and who was seeing who.

“No, we kissed after the race. He was so angry so… lost when he came back in to get changed. He walked in and I don’t know we just went to each other like it was the thing to do. He hugged me so hard; he probably could have cracked a rib. He got to talking bad about himself. How he couldn’t race anymore. That he should just quit. That it was his fault they weren’t doing good. I set him straight.”

“Good,” Kelley said. “That reminds me to give him my own pep talk when I go back. I’ll kick his ass if I ever hear him talking like that.”

“I wanted to. I gave him the what for. We hugged and it was… I don’t know so romantic. I pulled him to me this time and kissed him. TJ walked in and saw us.” Sarah recounted the ride home and what happened at the house. “Now I’m embarrassed talking to you about this.”

Kelley gave her a smile, “I can guess what happened.” She took a sip of her wine, the new information swirling in her head. The whole thing sounded as if it was out of a movie. It more than confirmed her earlier thoughts about how she thought Dale was in love with Sarah.

“But it doesn’t matter,” Sarah said suddenly. “Nothing matters. It was a moment that shouldn’t have happened. It was nothing more than what it was. Two people offering comfort.”

Kelley listened to Sarah talking but she didn’t believe a word the woman was saying. It sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than anything. She didn’t bother trying to add her input and correct Sarah just let her talk. She was already thinking about what to say when she got back to Mooresville and saw her brother.

“Why were you in New York?”

Sarah looked over at Kelley. “I was visiting the clinic. I was going to have the procedure done.”

“Oh,” Kelley said as it clicked. She dropped her eyes to the glass of wine that was well into the second glass.

“I never made it that far. I was mugged before I made it to my appointment.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Sarah.”

Sarah walked Kelley to the door later. They had talked the afternoon away and Kelley needed to get back on the road and make it home. “Kelley?” She stopped the woman from leaving. When she turned around said, “Thank you.”

“Anytime, Hon,” Kelley smiled and reached out, hugging the woman. “Don’t worry. This will work out. You’ll see.”

“I doubt it,” Sarah said as they broke the hugged. “I don’t think I’ll ever get over this and forgive Hawk for what he did. And Dale…” She shook her head, stuffing her hands in the front pocket of the hoodie. She didn’t think she’d ever be able to forgive Dale for spreading their escapades throughout the shop. Her hands came into contact with something. Grabbing it, she pulled it out; eyeing the money Dale had left on the counter. “Wait,” she called, before the door shut.

“What’s up?” Kelley asked, poking her head back.

“Give this back to Dale, he left it on the counter for me to use. I forgot I put it in my pocket,” she gave her hand a shake, waving the bills in front of Kelley. “Please take it. I can’t use it.”

“No,” Kelley shook her head. “Dale gave it to you; he’s not going to take it back. Use it. If you need anything, call me.” She pulled the door shut.

“Kelley! Kelley!” Sarah sighed and lowered her hand still clutching the money. She turned around, tossing the money on the counter. She grabbed her wine glass and took it into the kitchen where she refilled it. She sank down onto her couch with her wine and closed her eyes. She wanted this day to end. Tomorrow had to be better.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

He wasn’t sure how long he had been standing in the same spot. Killer nuzzled his hand, breaking him out of his reverie. His eyes cleared and he looked down at his dog, who sat next to him. Dale gave a loud groan and ran a hand over his face, cursing at the pain. It reminded him the past ten minutes had really happened.

‘Had it only been ten minutes?’ He wondered. The clock on the wall let him know that in that span he had gotten into a fist fight with his best friend and let the woman he lo…cared about walk about the door, angry at him for something he didn’t do. If his professional life wasn’t crappy enough now his personal life had to join the fun and been turned upside down.

The one constant in his life over the years was gone. There was no mistaking what Hawk had meant when he said he quit. He quit his job; he quit his friendship with Dale. Because Dale had broken the code and slept with his best friend’s sister. He had thrown away their friendship of more than twenty years for… what did he throw it away for?

Never had he considered Sarah a quick roll in the hay person. It never crossed his mind that she was just another woman in the long list of women he had slept with. He didn’t look at her that way. He didn’t treat her that way. She meant more to him. Meant more to him than any other woman before. It was her face he saw when he closed his eyes at night. It was her name that ran through his mind all day. 

And at Dover, it had been her face that he wanted to see when he climbed from the car. He had wanted her arms around him, offering comfort. He wanted to hear her words spoken to him, kicking his behind into shape. And it was Sarah that he wanted in his bed every night, the one he wanted to hold and fall asleep with. It was her smiling face that he wanted to wake up to.

His eyes caught the orange bottle sitting on the counter. He picked it up in his hands and read the white prescription label seeing Sarah’s name. He clutched it in his hand and closed his eyes, hoping to draw from it. In a hurry to leave, she had forgotten her pain pills and he immediately felt like a heel for if not being able to stop her, to make sure at least she or Kelley had the pill bottle. When bedtime rolled around, she was going to need the white capsules.

The pills brought back the emotions he felt on Thursday when she had first called him. The way she sounded over the phone: scared, worried, afraid. He wanted to reach through the phone, draw her into his arms, and promise her that everything would be okay. Upon seeing her in New York, anger coursed through him. Her beautiful face broken and battered. And when she cried that night he wanted to cry right along with her; make it his priority to make sure she never shed another tear.

With the pill bottle still in his hand he made his way to the bedroom and into the bathroom where he caught a glimpse of his reflection. He groaned out loud seeing the black and purple bruise already prominent beneath his left eye. His bottom lip was cut and swollen. Blood was dried on his chin and above his eye from where it had split open. He could just imagine what the media would say and the rumors that would be started.

The knuckles on his left hand were an angry red and busted open. It was painful to make a fist but he was confident nothing was broken. That was the good news; perhaps the only good news from the whole day.

He stripped his clothes off and got into the shower. He turned the water on letting the coldness jolt him before turning to hot. He let the hot stream beat down on him, working at his muscles. When he opened his eyes Sarah’s shampoo stared back at him. His breath caught as he inspected his shower finding the rest of her things nestled against his on the ledges as if they belonged there. And if he had anything to say about it – they did.

When he was finished he grabbed the towel from the rack and brought it to his face. He inhaled her scent immediately. It went in through his nose and wrapped around his senses, bringing awareness to his body. He quickly dried off, trying not to notice Sarah’s toothbrush next to his or the hairbrush lying on the counter.

The memories followed him into his bedroom where they hit him full force when he stared at his bed. Images flashed in his head of him and Sarah rolling on his bed in a tangle of sheets. He pictured him kissing down her neck, her body arching into his. He saw their hands clasped above her head as he perched over her. He heard their moans and saw their bodies glistening with sweat.

He shook his head removing the images. He saw his note still on the bedside table, but the pills were gone. He had wanted to wake her up before he left, but she had looked so peaceful, so beautiful, he couldn’t. She was curled into his arms like she was meant to be there and maybe she was. He certainly wasn’t going to complain. He gave a longing sigh and got dressed. He walked to his office, Killer following aimlessly.

“You miss her, huh?” Dale asked his dog as he sat down in his chair. “Me too.” He noticed a few things out of place and his computer in sleep mode. He moved the mouse watching the screen come to life. Windows were open to the North Carolina DMV and to Sarah’s bank account which had timed out. He chuckled seeing Twitter pulled up. He thought about updating her status, but he didn’t think it would help his cause any. He clicked out of the page and her bank – giving her privacy.

Glancing down he caught sight of the printouts and a list written on a plain, white computer sheet. He picked the papers up and looked at them, seeing a print out of Sarah’s transactions. Some highlighted and circled, some with her neat, loopy handwritten notations beside them. He whistled seeing the amount of money that asshole had squandered from her account. He wanted to replenish the amount so she wouldn’t have to worry.

‘Yeah right,’ he thought. She wouldn’t accept a handout from him. ‘She took the money on the counter,’ he told himself. He hoped she used it.

He stared down at her list of things she needed to do, needed to cancel, replace and dispute until the words blurred in front of him and his mind drifted. He had plans for this day, coming home, driving Sarah to Raleigh. Helping her with whatever she needed help with. He hoped they could talk about what happened last night. He could tell her all that he was feeling, about her and fathering a baby. If anyone would understand, it would be her.

He would have explained the misunderstanding; Hawk had never talked about her – at least in the context she thought. They talked about everything – he, Hawk, TJ and Tony Jr. What was said in that group never left. There was no gossiping around the shop and poking fun – about anyone’s wife, girlfriend or sister. Sarah wanting a child was nothing to gossip and make fun of. It was personal. And maybe after he got that straightened out, they could talk about where they went from here. Last night hadn’t been the run-of-the-mill one night stand. It had meant something to him and he wanted to know if it meant something to her.

He felt something for her; Hawk be damned. He felt something that he hadn’t felt for anyone before. He was at ease when he was around her. Sliding into the more-than-friend’s role wasn’t awkward for him. It was almost natural. He knew her, she knew him – the real him. She knew him when he was just Dale Jr., where there were no expectations, no legacy to live up to. She wasn’t impressed with his name or the zeros in his bank account. Around her, he could be himself.

He had no idea what to do with Hawk. He didn’t know how he was going to repair their relationship. Hawk was his best friend; he wanted to keep it that way. But the road to get back to where they were last month, even yesterday, was unknown. No doubt it would be rough. He wanted Hawk in his life. He also wanted Sarah in his life. The Hawkins’ siblings were important to him.

*~*~*~*~*

Hawk tore from Dale’s driveway, tire squealing, the engine whining. The anger radiated through him. He slapped at the dash, silencing the radio. The quiet unnerved him, he punched his steering wheel. His knuckles reopened, glistening with blood.

It was hard to believe he had busted his skin on Dale. Thinking his name brought more anger and he wished he smoked. But he had quit in a promise to Angie when she found out she was pregnant.

“That sonofabitch,” he yelled. Dale had slept with Sarah. Dale and Sarah. He could still picture her wearing Dale’s clothes, walking barefoot through his house without a care in the world. “Goddamnit!” ‘How could they do this to me?’ How could they sleep together behind his back? How could they not care about him?

He drove on, still furious. He quit his job so he wasn’t going back to the shop. He couldn’t go home. Going home meant he had to explain to Angie what happened. He did not want to face his wife. He knew Angie would tell him he was wrong and that it wasn’t his business. But it was. Sarah was his sister. That made it his business.

There was no way Dale was the right man for Sarah. He knew about Sarah’s teenage crush on Dale – it wasn’t exactly a secret. But they were a lot different now than they were in high school. Hawk knew who Dale slept with, how many one night stands he had. He also knew how many times he used a woman. No – there was no way he’d let Dale with Sarah and let Sarah become one of those women.

If there was one person he knew in this world, it was Sarah. He knew the type of man Sarah sought; there was no way Dale Earnhardt Jr. fit that mold. The guy was his best – ex-best friend, but that didn’t mean he agreed with some of his antics concerning women. Sarah wanted the family man, a regular man that came home every night, spent every weekend home, taking family vacations. Dale was constantly busy, being pulled in every direction.

Hawk couldn’t even fathom the reaction of JR Nation – Dale’s fan base. In the midst of the loyal fans it was chalked full with the jealous types who made it their business to know everything about any woman that Dale happened to be dating or even seen with. And then they would spread harsh opinions across fan boards, hounding the latest girl. He didn’t want Sarah to be labeled as ‘Flavor of the Month’.

He didn’t want to hear the horrid gossip, calling his sister a slut, a gold digger, bitch, whore. He didn’t want to see them saying she is the reason Dale was doing badly on the track. He didn’t want them to attack her appearance. Any of it would surely kill Sarah and her self-esteem.

She didn’t need to be worrying about the countless articles that ended up in the National Enquirer or the numerous rumors of who he’s sleeping with or cheating on. She didn’t need the jealous pit lizards (that didn’t have a chance to begin with) hounding, calling her names. No – she needed a regular guy that wasn’t in the spotlight.

Hawk groaned when he saw his driveway. Lost in thought he has driven to his house. He signed and pulled into his drive. His mind screamed to turn around, but he had no where to go and it was too early to go to a bar. He looked at his reflection in the rearview mirror and groaned. He was about to enter the lion’s den.

“Hawk?” Angie’s voice drifted down the stairs as he shut the door behind him. “Is everything okay? You’re home early.” She started down the stairs and stalled mid-way when she saw his face. “What happened!” She moved as fast as she could down the rest of the stairs, following her husband into the kitchen.

“Nothing,” Hawk said. He reached into the freezer and grabbed a bag of frozen vegetables. He welcomes the pain when he placed the bag on his face.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” Angie said, crossing her arms as she took a no nonsense stance. “And remember who you are talking to.”

“Got into a fight.” Hawk said as he moved past his wife, heading into the living room where sank down onto the couch.

“No shit Hawk. With who and why?” When Hawk didn’t offer up anything, she sighed and went into the bathroom where she dampened a washcloth. Back in the living room, she removed the vegetables and started wiping the dried blood off her husband’s face. “Don’t make me drive to the shop and find out what happened. You know I will.”

Hawk sighed, knowing Angie wasn’t playing. She would do exactly what she said. He couldn’t even tell her that she wouldn’t find out anything there. But she could piece together what the guys would tell her. “Fought with Sarah…”

“Sarah did this to you?” Angie pulled the cloth away, staring at Hawk, disbelieving. “You were in Raleigh?”

“No, I went to work this morning. Sarah’s at Dale’s.” Hawk said. His fist clenched again. “I got into a yelling match with Sarah. I got into a punching match with Dale.”

“Dale?” This time the cloth stilled on Hawk’s face. “Dale hit you? What did you do?”

“Hit him first. Ouch! What the hell did you do that for?” He grimaced when Angie stroked at his cheek harder.

“Stop being a dick and trying to get out of telling me. You’d better start talking. From the beginning.”

As Angie softened her hand, Hawk began telling her the story; what happened at the shop and ultimately what happened at Dale’s. “She left with Kelley. Kelley’s taking her back to Raleigh.”

Angie pursed her lips as she removed the last of the blood from Hawk’s face. She couldn’t believe all that had transpired in half a day. Two… ‘Three,’ her mind corrected. Three relationships ruined: Dale’s and Hawk’s. Hawk’s and Sarah’s. And Sarah’s and Dale’s. She shook her head as she stared at her husband.

“Aren’t you going to say something?”

“I don’t know where to start.” Angie said honestly. It was a lot to take-in in one sitting. “You guys are worse than women I swear. What the hell were you thinking digging into Sarah like that?”

“What?” Hawk asked in shock. “What are you talking about? She’s sleeping with Dale! Behind my back!”

“You mad because he’s cheating on you? Sorry Hawk,” Angie stood up from the couch. “Dale is a big boy. Sarah’s a big girl. They can sleep with whoever they want.”

“But he’s all wrong for her!”

“He’s your best friend! He’s your best friend Hawk. That ought to mean something to you. He’s been your friend for over twenty years and you just threw it away because he slept with Sarah. Are you punishing him only because I can probably guarantee that Sarah wasn’t exactly unwilling. Did you even take the time to find out why Dale had to fly to New York to get her? Did you ask why Sarah looked like she was in a fight?”

“No,” Hawk mumbled. “Dale walked in before we could discuss the details.”

“Don’t be an ass,” Angie snapped. She tossed the washcloth down in Hawk’s lap. “Dale and Sarah do not need your permission. I think it’s about damn time. There’s been more between them than friendship for years.”

“What?” Hawk bellowed, standing up. “You’re for this!”

“Yes!” Angie yelled. “What is so wrong about those two together? Sarah will be good for Dale. God knows she is a complete one eighty from the trash he’s usually with. Sarah is the type of girl he needs in his life. And Sarah – well you’ve seen what she had the last time. Dale will treat her right.”

“Yeah, until the next blonde bimbo comes along.”

“You’re not giving Dale enough credit. Do you see what he has to work with? The trampy whores that want nothing more than his money. Once they got that, they don’t care they’ll hop into bed with another driver, crew member anyone else. If Sarah is happy with Dale and vice versa, then that’s all that matters. Think about the past week when she wasn’t talking to the two of you. You were pissed, but how was Dale? You probably didn’t even notice a change in him. And you’ll find there is a reason that Sarah called Dale in New York.”

“She’s hiding something from me. She never does that!” Hawk said. “He knows. I know he knows what it is.”

“And there probably is a reason for that.” Angie called over her shoulder as she left the room and headed back upstairs.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

*6 weeks later*

“Hey.”

Angie held the phone closer to her ear, her eyes peering out the window where her husband sat atop a John Deere riding mower. “Hello Dale.” Her eyes followed her husband as he went up and down their front yard, mowing the grass. Ethan proudly sat on Hawk’s lap, his hand tightly gripping the wheel. His mouth was moving a mile a minute.

“How’s it going?” Dale asked. He sat outside in a chair next to his pool. The water glistened in the sun. His dogs lay at his feet half covered by the shade his chair offered.

“I told you last week, you have to end this. If he doesn’t go back to work soon, I’ll kill him. He’s driving me nuts.”

Dale gave a chuckle. “His job is still here. He can come back anytime.”

“We both know he won’t do it on his own. He’s so God-damned stubborn…”

After the fight at Dale’s house, Hawk had been true to his word. He quit JR Motorsports. He hadn’t talk to anyone from the shop, including Dale and Kelley. He hadn’t talked to Sarah. He had done nothing but hang around the house – for the past six weeks. Angie was passed irritated. She loved her husband but he was constantly underfoot, constantly around. He quit his job and she ceased to have any time to herself.

After a week had gone by, Kelley called. After discussing what idiots Hawk and Dale were, she informed Angie that Hawk still had his job. He was just on paid leave until the men were able to pull their heads out of their asses. Both women thought it would only last a week, two at the most. But when week rolled into week after week with no reconciliation in sight.

They were silent for a few moments. Angie waited knowing what was coming. These weekly phone calls started immediately. She was his only link. He started off with small talk then got down to the point of why he was calling.

“How’s Sarah?” Dale finally asked. She was on his mind constantly. But since that afternoon he hadn’t talked to her or seen her face. She wouldn’t answer any of his calls, text or e-mails. The first week he sent some sort of communication every day. After receiving no reply, it went down to once a week. Once a week he’d call and talk to her voicemail.

“She’s doing okay. Says she’s been working a lot.” Angie filled him in. Sarah called once a week to talk to her and Ethan, never Hawk. Hawk never said anything about the phone calls – he knew who was on the other end. Even though he never asked, Angie told him anyway how Sarah was doing. She was married to an idiot. The longer the silence between siblings went on, she feared the harder it would be to break it.

“She mentioned going on vacation in August – a cruise – an Alaskan cruise.”

“A cruise?” Dale repeated. His mind worked to absorb the information. “But Eyas is afraid of boats. It’s always a fight to talk her out onto the lake and she’s going out in the ocean? That doesn’t make any sense.” His breath caught in his throat as a thought came to mind. “Is she…is she going alone?”

He waited for Angie’s answer. The thought of Sarah going on vacation with another man churned his stomach. He didn’t want to imagine another man moving into her life, implanting himself into his spot; the spot that should have been his anyway.

“Yes, she’s going by herself,” which Angie had questioned and questioned. She wasn’t sure it was a good idea but she couldn’t change Sarah’s mind. “If I hadn’t just given birth when the cruise is set to sail, I would take off with her. Sounds like a wonderful time. A sight to see.”

“Wasn’t she saving her vacation time and money?”

Angie sighed, having asked the same thing. “She decided not to go through with it, Dale. And when I think of how she sounded when she told me that, I get even more pissed off at you and Hawk. She was so happy and set on having a baby. I can tell she’s upset about it.”

Dale swore, his head falling into his hand. It was that statement that nearly brought him to his knees. The fact that he was part of the reason she had made this decision. For the first time, he wanted to skip the weekend’s race in Sonoma and head to Raleigh.

“She’s still hurting. But she still cares for you.” Angie waited a beat letting the news sink in. “Much like you do, after the small talk is over, she asks about you. She tries to act like she doesn’t care but she does.”

“Then why doesn’t she answer my calls?”

“She’s a stubborn idiot too. Must run in the family.” Angie said dryly. “Don’t give up Dale. She’ll come around, I know she will. You need to explain your side.”

“I have. I e-mailed her, but she never replied. I don’t even know if she read it.”

“Make her listen Dale. Find a way to make her listen.”

*~*~*~*~*

“You’re pregnant.”

Sarah stared at the smiling doctor. She felt the blood drain from her face, her jaw slackened in shock. Her lips moved, but she couldn’t force a sound out of them. Pregnant. It was the last she expected when she came into the doctor’s office.

“Sarah?’ The doctor questioned. “Are you alright? You don’t look happy? I thought you wanted a child?”

Sarah closed her mouth and blinked a couple times. “I did…I do.” She choked out. “Never expected it to happen like this.”

“The natural, usual way?” The doctor quipped with a smile. “Sarah, are you happy with this?”

Sarah stared at the doctor, her mind wandering. She glanced down at her stomach, placing a hand over it. There was a child growing inside. A smile grew on her lips. A child. Her child. She looked back at the doctor, tears filling her eyes. ‘Yes. Yes I’m happy with this. I didn’t…I never thought it would happen after New York. I never expected.”

“Judging by the date of your last period, you’re six weeks along. Your due date is February sixteenth. We’ll schedule you for an ultrasound during your tenth week. We’ll get a better estimation of how far along you are.”

“That sounds about right.” Sarah answered. “There’s only one day it could be. We didn’t…never even. God,” she sighed. “I sound like an irresponsible teenager.”

“Don’t worry about it.” The doctor chuckled. “I told you when you first started your hormone treatment for the insemination, I informed you that you were more apt to get pregnant with unprotected sex.”

Sarah nodded even as she spoke. “I know. I know. I never thought about it. Never crossed my mind. It never crossed my mind until just a few minutes ago.”

“I’ll write out a prescription for pre-natal vitamins. On your way out, make an appointment for the ultrasound in four weeks.”

Sarah sat in her car in the parking lot after leaving the doctor’s office. She was pregnant – pregnant! She wrapped her arms around her stomach and gave a little squeeze. Life was growing inside of her at this moment. In eight short months, she was going to be a mother. She would finally be what she wanted most.

“I love you my sweet angel,” she whispered, her fingers caressing the material covering her belly. “I can’t wait to meet you.” She wiped a tear from her cheek. “I never expected it to happen this way. I had it all planned out…oh this is gonna be a mess. What am I going to do?”

This was not how it was supposed to happen. She was supposed to go to New York, get pregnant by an anonymous donor. Then move to Mooresville so she could be closer to Angie and Hawk. She was going to raise her child by herself. Now she was estranged from her brother. And not only was she not pregnant by someone anonymous, she was pregnant by someone she knew really well.

Really well.

*~*~*~*~*

Dale walked around Sarah’s living room. ‘Make her listen.’ The words Angie had told him only a week before echoed through his head. After returning from New Hampshire, a bright spot on his 2010 resume – finishing eighth – he decided after the Tuesday meeting he was driving to Raleigh. It was the only way he could make her listen.

She might be able to erase his text messages and voicemails and delete his e-mails, but there was no way she could ignore him when he was standing in front of her. And with the help of Angie and a spare key, he was able to wait inside the apartment for Sarah to return after work.

It was the first time he’d been inside Sarah’s place and when he entered he set out exploring. He knew the layout from Hawk, who talking about the apartment when Sarah first moved in. It was small, enough for one person which made Dale wonder how she was going to manage having a baby in there. Experience from his nieces led him to know just how much stuff a baby needed.

He moved to a collage photo frame on one of the living room walls. There was a photo of Sarah dressed in a business suit surrounded by people dressed like her, raising their glasses. ‘Her promotion…’ He remembered the pride in Hawk’s voice as he told him about Sarah getting a promotion at work. One of the tops in her department, Hawk had said. In another photo, Sarah was wearing a bridesmaid dress, next to Angie in her bridal gown. It was a candid shot, taken from the dressing room rather than a professional one. 

He saw himself in one, taken a couple years ago in Charlotte at the track. Hawk, Angie and Sarah had been his guests for the Coke 600 and were with him on pit road. They stood next to his car, Sarah hugged against his right side, Angie on his left and Hawk on Angie’s left. There was a photo of Sarah with Ethan, Sarah with Kelley and Sarah with Angie and Kelley. 

The photo in the center caught his eye and he remembered when it was taken. Their group – Hawk, Angie, Sarah, Kelley and Dale – had gotten together after the season was over, during the holiday season and went out to dinner. Kelley brought the man she was seeing at the time and it left Dale and Sarah as the odd men out in the midst of the two couples.

When an idea came out about a group photo, it was decided to do couples only. Not wanting to be left out, Sarah and Dale posed together as a ‘couple’ for the came. Their chairs scooted close together, with his arm around her shoulders. He remembered her hand had rested on his thigh. He couldn’t believe he had never seen the photo. Remembered everything about that night, remembered the picture being taken, but never saw the turn out. They looked perfect…right. They looked right together.

When keys jingled at the door, he turned away from the picture and stood in the middle of the living room, his eyes watching, waiting for Sarah to enter.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

Sarah closed the door behind her. She clutched the small bag in her hand. After the doctor’s appointment, she feigned off work the rest of the day but instead of going home, walked around the mall for awhile.

The baby stores and sections called to her. And she looked at every tiny shoe and hat in blue and pink. She wanted desperately to load up her hands in one of everything. Even though she left most of the items on the shelf, she did walk away with a soft, brown teddy bear; a plaid ribbon tied in a bow around its neck and a journal. The journal was to record her pregnancy and the younger years of her child’s life. She wanted to change out of her work attire and into something more comfortable and sit on the couch and start writing everything down.

Glancing up her heart stopped and then beat wildly seeing the figure standing in the middle of her living room. She swallowed and gripped the handle of her shopping bag tighter. The ache in her heart was more prominent staring into Dale’s eyes. At least when he wasn’t within sights, it didn’t hurt so much.

“Sarah,” Dale said and took a step forward. He wanted to grab her and kiss her until she was plight in his arms then carry her to the bedroom he saw down the hall and make love to her the rest of the night. It was as if she knew what he was thinking as he watched her straighten up. Her eyes quickly became sheltered.

“What are you doing here? How did you get in here?” The pre-natal vitamins in her purse felt like bricks weighing her down. She thought she would have time to gather her thoughts before she had to tell Dale.

“It’s the only way I could think of to get you to talk to me. You didn’t answer my calls or reply to my messages.”

“Take a hint, Dale.” For the first couple of days, she deleted the voicemails, messages and e-mails while her anger was at a high point. The more days passed, the hurt bypassed the anger. While she still didn’t listen or read any messages, they were all still saved.

“Damnit Eyas,” Dale sighed frustrated and ran a hand through his hair. “Please listen to me. Let me explain some things. I don’t like you thinking what you’re probably thinking about me.” He waited finally taking her silence as consent.

“Hawk and I still aren’t talking, so I don’t want you to believe I’m here on his behalf when I say this. We don’t sit around talking about you, Kelley or any other woman in our lives.” At Sarah’s raised eyebrow he further explained. “Okay there have been some of the women in my past we have, but never you. Never Kelley.

“We sit around like old busybodies at the beauty salon. Hawk tells us what you’re up to. Your promotion, raises, and stories you’ve told him. We’ve never disrespected your decisions. We wouldn’t do that to you.” His mind jumped back to that day in his house, the hurt that was on her face as she yelled at Hawk. He wanted to comfort her, was going to comfort her until she turned on him.

“And I didn’t go to the shop the next morning boasting the tales from the night before. We didn’t high five, chest bump and grab our crotches in some male ritual.” He saw her lips twinge in a hint of a smile. “What happened that night,” he wanted to brush the hair back from her face and lift her chin to kiss her lips. He wanted to see her hair fanned out across his pillow again. “What happened between us was just that. Between us. It was personal and no one’s business but ours.

“I didn’t tell anyone and I sure as hell didn’t tell Hawk. I was in a meeting all morning at the shop before I went to over there. By the time I got there, TJ had already opened his mouth. I got to the house as fast as I could. The people that know for sure what happened are the only ones who were in my house. No one else knows, they may speculate but they don’t know. I should have tried to explain this before and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you. It wasn’t something I meant to do and something I don’t ever want to do.”

It was probably one of the longest speeches she had heard from Dale. The way he spoke left no doubt that he meant the words and Sarah felt some of her resistance melt. Could she have created this whole mess on herself but jumping to conclusions?

“The baby…” she whispered and glanced at Dale. “You told me you wanted to…to father my ch…child. But you said it wasn’t your idea.”

He sighed and sat down on the couch. “Please sit down.” He watched as she hesitated before finally making her way to the couch and sitting beside him. Not as close as he liked but he’d take it. “Hawk honestly didn’t mean to bring it up. He made a comment about pregnancy and TJ made the jump, so he explained. None of us had a laugh about it. Angie told Hawk…God I don’t want to get you mad at anyone else.”

“It’s okay. Just tell me.”

“Angie mentioned to Hawk that he should hook you up with someone from the shop –”

“Like I’d date anyone from there,” she rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

“Which is when the laughs came. There was laughing, but not at you, Eyas. TJ volunteered and we all shot him down. TJ said I should do it that it would be ‘perfect’, but Hawk quickly shot it down.” And that still hurt that his best friend didn’t think he was good enough for his sister.

“Why did TJ think it would be perfect?”

“Because you wanted a baby without a relationship and I can never have a relationship because fans always take her apart on the Internet.”

“So TJ, in his mind, thought it was a good idea, but you asked me. So why do you think it’s a good idea? Why do you want to be the father of my baby?”

Before he could answer the shrill of the phone rang through the apartment. He didn’t know if that was good or not. Sarah had put him on the spot and he didn’t know if he was prepared to tell her his feelings, what he felt toward her.

“Hello?” Sarah said into the phone after she picked it up. “Hawk? Hawk? Slow down.” She felt Dale behind her and she reached back to grab his hand. “Angie…but…” she squeezed his hand as she listened to her brother talk quickly. “Ethan… I’ll be there Hawk. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” She pressed the off button and lifted frightened eyes to Dale.

“What’s wrong, Eyas?” Dale removed the phone from her hand so he could hold them both.

“Angie…” Sarah whispered. “She…she went into labor. Oh God Dale,” She went willingly when Dale pulled her into his arms. “It’s too soon. It’s too soon.” She hugged him tight trying to draw strength, the thought of something happening to her niece or nephew or Angie. “You gotta get me there, Dale. I gotta be there. Hawk…”

“Calm down,” he cupped her face with his hands. “Calm down, okay? Okay?” At her nod, he continued. “Go grab your things, I’ll get you there.”


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

Sarah rushed down the hall, aware of Dale following closely behind her. Before she could stop at the nurses’ desk and ask where Angie was, she spotted Hawk in the hallway.

“Hawk!”

She made a beeline for her brother and she was swept up in his arms. She held him tightly, tears threatening to fall. The longest the two siblings when without speaking was one week. And it was only that long because Hawk had been on his honeymoon at the time. They might not see each other all the time, but that didn’t mean neither one of them called each other.

“Eyas,” Hawk breathed holding his sister close. He took a shuddering breath. 

“Oh Hawk,” her voice cracked. “I got here as fast as I could. How is she? What happened? Have you ate yet? Where’s Ethan? How is she?”

Hawk gave a small smile at his sister as he looked down at her. “Angie’s doing okay. They’ve given her something to try to stop the labor. We’re just waiting now. I don’t know what happened, we were just out for lunch and she doubled over in pain.” He couldn’t forget the dread that ran through him when Angie told him she was in labor. He had never been as scared as he was in that moment in his life. 

“I can’t think about eating. God,” he turned around running his hands over his face and through his hair. “She’s only seven months, Sarah. What happens if she gives birth and there is something wrong? What happens…” he paused for a minute closing his eyes. “What happens if we lose our baby?”

“No, no,” Sarah pulled her brother back into a hug. “Don’t talk like that, Hawk. Don’t think that. The doctors here, they’re gonna stop the labor and Angie’s gonna go home and in two months you’ll be back here welcoming little Karli into the world.”

“Aaron,” Hawk automatically corrected. “Angie is… Angie is so scared. How am I supposed to be strong for her when I’m just as scared as she is? More scared. Something could happen and I could lose them both.”

Sarah watched as Hawk turned his back on them, hiding his emotions. She saw the small quake of his shoulders. The tears trickled freely down her face at her brother’s display. She turned helpless eyes toward Dale. What could she do to help?

The past 6 weeks fell away, becoming unimportant, as Dale looked at the siblings. These were two of the most important people in his life and he felt helpless to do anything. It wasn’t a position he was in often. He hated having his hands tied.

The fight between them didn’t matter at the moment. Only two things did: Angie and the little baby. He took a step forward and hoped that Hawk would accept his help. He placed a hand on his best friend’s shoulder.

“Hey man, let’s go for a walk. We’ll get something to eat. Angie doesn’t need to see you like this.”

Sarah held her breath as she heard Dale’s words and watched the men. She wasn’t sure if Hawk would go with Dale considering all that’s happened, so she was surprised when Hawk nodded his head and both men walked down the hall together.

She released her breath and wiped her eyes before she opened the door to his sister-in-law’s room.

*~*~*~*~*

Hawk stood outside in the courtyard of the hospital. He stared out over the grounds, seeing nothing. Almost automatically he placed the cigarette to his lips. ‘Angie’s gonna kill me,’ he thought as he took a puff. 

“When Angie tears into me for smoking, I’m blaming you,” Hawk said.

“Likewise with Kelley,” Dale echoed as he too, put his cigarette to his lips. It had been awhile since he’s smoked, having given them up awhile ago. He didn’t know what made him pick up a pack when he stopped to fill up on the way from Raleigh.

“I should be up there with her.”

“Sarah’s with her. She’ll call if something happens. Take a breather,” Dale told him. “Get your head on straight.”

Hawk stared at Dale. Like his face, Dale’s bruises had faded and there was no effects from their fight left – physically at least. “I’m not even sure why you’re even here. Or with Sarah.”

Dale sighed and rubbed out the end of the cigarette, holding the butt in his hand. He had hoped they could put this, not behind them, but at least to the side while they waited for word about Angie. Apparently, Hawk had other ideas.

“I was with Sarah when you called.” He figured that wouldn’t help his case since it was the reason that Hawk was mad at him in the first place – he being with Sarah. He could see Hawk tense.

“You’ve been together all this time?’ Hawk gritted his teeth.

“No, today was the first time I’ve seen her since the morning at my house. She cut me out of her life too.”

“It’s your fault. If you hadn’t started sleeping with her, this wouldn’t be happening.”

“Contrary to whatever the hell it is you believe, I slept with Sarah once and that was before your damn temper got us into this place. Instead of storming into my house like a bat out of hell, you should have minded your own business!”

“Sarah is my business!” Hawk’s glare shot venom. “Sarah is my sister. My sister! You were supposed to be my best friend.”

“She can sleep with whoever she wants!”

“You have enough women parading through your bedroom! Why did you have to include Sarah?”

“If that what you think Sarah is?” Dale walked a few steps away and took a calming breath before he turned back on Hawk. “You think Sarah was nothing more than a bed warmer? A of the wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am? That she was going to be cast aside when something better came along?”

“This is how you’re seeing me after over twenty years of friendship? You think I’m the same person I was ten-fifteen years ago? You can not hold that against me! We’re not all as lucky as you to find the woman you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with as early as you did with Angie. Some of us have to wait and search.”

“You’re saying Sarah is that girl?” Part of the anger evaporated from Hawk as he listened to Dale speak.

“I don’t know,” Dale sighed. “But she’s different. She’s been in my life for so long and it’s like I’m just now seeing her. I don’t know what we’ve got going on,” ‘Nothing at the moment,’ the voice in his head spoke up. “But I want to see where this is going and I think Sarah does to.”

“You and Sarah,” Hawk shook his head. “You guys never once tried to tell me? You had to keep it a secret?” He grabbed his phone from his pocket when it vibrated against his leg.

“This thing between us hasn’t been going on forever, Hawk. It’s fairly new. And when it did start, she was pissed as us. Which seems to be a common occurrence recently.”

“What happened before you went to…” Hawk trailed off as he read the text message on his phone. The blood drained from his face. “Angie’s water just broke.”

Both men took off running through the courtyard, sidestepping over visitors and staff. Hawk reached the door one step ahead of Dale and he flung it open. He raced down the hall way, bypassing the elevator and took the stairs two at a time to the labor and delivery floor. Sprinting down the hall, he almost ran passed his wife’s door before he grabbed the door jam and pushed it open.

The room was filled with doctors and nurses. His is sister stood at Angie’s side, holding her hand, brushing her hair away from her face. They both turned to look at him.

“Angie,” he whispered and went to her immediately. Sarah faded to the background.

“I’m sorry Hawk,” Angie whispered, a tear rolling down her cheek. “I must have did something…”

“Shhh,” Hawk silenced her with a kiss. “You did nothing wrong. We’ll be okay. Baby Aaron will be okay.”

“Karli,” Angie managed a small smile through the anguish. She cringed as another contraction rippled through her stomach. She squeezed her husband’s hand tight. “Hawk?” She said when the contraction was over.

“Yes, Baby?”

“You and I are gonna have a talk about your smoking again.”

“It’s Dale’s fault.”


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

“It’s a girl!”

Dale and Sarah jumped from their seats in the maternity ward where they had been sitting for the past four hours, the clock hands slowly ticking away the time while every magazine in the waiting room had been read from cover to cover.

When they weren’t flipping through magazines or filling in the crossword puzzle to the best of their knowledge, they sat quietly together; each lost in thoughts, both unable to start a conversation on the things they really wanted to talk about.

“A girl!” Sarah’s grin grew big and wide as she hugged her older brother. She held him tight before releasing him. “And you were so sure it was going to be a boy!” She wiped the tears rolling down her face.

“I was so sure, I asked the doctor to double check,” Hawk chuckled as he shook Dale’s hand.

“Little Karli’s okay? Angie?” Sarah asked.

“Ten fingers, ten toes, looks just like her Momma.”

“Thank God,” Dale chuckled. He watched his friend’s expression feeling a little envious. What he wouldn’t give to have the roles reversed and he coming from the delivery room announcing the birth of his son or daughter.

‘She’s nineteen inches long and weighs six pounds ten ounces. Oh she’s so tiny! I was afraid to hold her.”

“You did hold her right?” 

“Of course I did! My little Angel,” Hawk gave a sigh of relief and leaned back against the wall. He rubbed his hands over his face, pressing his palms in his eyes. “Never have I been so scared… but it worked out. Karli’s a little small, but the doctor doesn’t believe there is anything wrong with her.”

“I knew it would be okay,” Sarah’s hand itched to cover her own belly and press against the life growing inside of her. Her arms felt empty and she longed for a baby to be placed in them. She gave a longing sigh. “How is Angie?”

“Good. Good. It was rough. It took a lot out of her. But she did great. She did great.” He gave a relieved sigh and when he looked back at Dale and Sarah the smile was back on his face. “Wanna see a picture?”

“Yes, you idiot! Why didn’t you show us first thing!”

“I forgot,” it was apparent the ‘new father’ syndrome was in full effect with Hawk. He pulled out his cell phone and quickly pulled up the pictures he had snapped.

The first picture pulled up was of Karli all cleaned off and wrapped in a standard hospital baby blanket and a pink hat. Sarah let out a girlie sigh at the beautiful baby. “I just want to snatch her from the nursery and snuggle. What?” She saw the looks both guys were giving her. “Well I do. I can’t wait to get my hands on her.”

Hawk shook his head and scrolled slowly through the photos. “There are a lot more on the camera. One of the nurses took some for me when I was with Angie. These are mostly G-rated because I was sending them out.”

“So darling,” Sarah said and snatched the phone from Hawk’s hand. “I’m sending this to me.” She quickly sent the picture off and a few seconds later felt the responding chime on her phone. “Can we see Angie yet?”

Hawk shook his head. “Not until they move her to the mother-baby ward and out of labor and delivery. I don’t know how long that takes. It was too late to get an epidural so they don’t have to wait for feeling to come back. I think they are just waiting until she can go to the bathroom okay. Once we are in the room, they’ll bring Karli to us. They are doing all that new baby stuff. The pediatrician is checking her out; they are looking her over and will bathe her.”

“I need to call Angie’s folks and tell them the news and talk to Ethan. I hope he’s excited for a sister. He was ecstatic when he thought we were giving him a little brother.”

“Do you need us to do anything? Do you need something?’ Dale asked. “Did you bring things to the hospital?”

“Yeah, while we’re waiting to see Angie and Karli, we could run to the house and get the hospital bag and anything else you need.”

“That’d be great,” Hawk said with obvious appreciation. “Angie had a hospital bag packed, but we didn’t expect it to happen this early. We don’t have anything here.”

“No problem. We’ll run and bring it back. Anything you need?”

Armed with a list of items Hawk wanted, Dale and Sarah left the hospital. While on the road, Sarah called her boss and got the next two days off, due back at work Thursday morning.

“How are you getting back to Raleigh?” Dale asked to break the silence in the vehicle after Sarah hung up from her boss. 

“I’m not sure. Maybe Hawk will run me home. Angie’s parents will still be here to help out.”

“You think you can pull Hawk away from Karli? After seeing him earlier, I don’t think he’ll want to go to the bathroom without her.”

Sarah smiled, remembering her brother. “I know. He’s so…so…”

“Happy?” Dale supplied.

“Yes, but so much more than that. I think he’s secretly happy he had a girl. Sure he may have put on that macho ‘I-want-a-boy-because-I’m-a-man’ mantra, but I think he wanted a little girl.”

“Believe so?’ He asked, even though he agreed with Sarah, especially after witnessing his friend’s elation in the hospital waiting room. 

“Oh yeah. I think deep down, every man wants to have a girl. Don’t get me wrong,” she quickly went on before Dale could say something. “I know they all want that boy, the namesake to carry on the family name. The boy they can teach ‘man’ things to. But I think they want that little girl; the daddy’s little princess, the small replica of their mother.”

Dale couldn’t dispute Sarah’s words. He did want a son, but he couldn’t help his lips curling into a small smile at the thought of a little girl wearing a dress and pigtails running toward him, laughing and giggling. His heart tightened, imaging the little girl with bright blue eyes and her mother’s blonde hair. When he pictured her laugh, it sounded like the woman’s sitting next to him.

“You’re probably right. But isn’t it the same with mothers and little boys?” Dale asked as they pulled into Hawk’s driveway and parking in front of the garage.

Sarah paused before opening the door. The little boy her mind created mirrored his father completely down to the blue eyes and crocked grin. Seeing the picture so clearly in her mind, she placed a hand over her stomach, over the little life inside. How she wished for a boy, a miniature replica of his father.

“Yes. I guess it is.” She quickly climbed from the truck. The topic of discussion was getting to close to home for her. She desperately wanted a little boy like his father with the reddish-blonde brown hair, a little girl with that same crocked grin.

“Are you okay?” Dale caught up with her at the front door as she used the spare key to unlock the door.

“Yeah,” Sarah gave him a smile that she was sure he would see as fake, but didn’t give him time to question. “Anxious to meet my new niece.”

Dale let it go, knowing there wasn’t enough time to get into the conversation they needed to have. As he helped Sarah gather what Hawk needed, he resigned that he had two days to talk to Sarah and finish what they started in Raleigh before she needed to go home. And he hoped Hawk would be busy enough not to give Sarah a ride home and he would be able to. It seemed the only way they would be able to fully talk was if they were by themselves.

And they needed to talk.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

“I could just eat her up,” Sarah cooed as she snuggled with newborn Karli. Her eyes were riveted to the tiny baby cradled in her arms, snuggled in a pink receiving blanket fast asleep.

“If you’re hungry, we can send for food,” Hawk grinned. He sat on the chair next to his wife’s bedside, holding her hand tightly in his, his thumb caressing the back on her hand.

“Ha, ha,” Sarah didn’t even warrant that remark a look. She smiled softly as Karli gave a small yawn before settling back down. “She’s just so beautiful. Are you sure she’s yours?” This time she did look up at Hawk.

“Yes, she’s mine.” Hawk smirked. “I was there you know.”

“For a minute or two,” Angie quipped causing the adults to break out into laughter.

Sarah shushed them when Karli startled at the loud noise. She whispered softly to her, rocking her gently as she settled back down. It wasn’t hard to impose herself in Angie’s position; lying in the hospital bed recovering after just giving birth. She could imagine the tiny baby she was holding was her own daughter. With her head down, she lifted her eyes to see her brother lean over and kiss Angie gently, the love evident on each other’s faces. And she felt her heart break over the fact that she would never know the feeling of having a man – her husband – look at her with such love, such adoration after bringing their son or daughter into the world.

Her eyes cut to Dale, seeing him staring at her. His gaze shuttered before she could get a good read and wondered what he was thinking. Her thoughts drifted to her own child, nestled protected in her womb. She tried to picture the same hospital scene in eight months but hers was vastly different. Sure Angie and Hawk would be there with her, cooing and cuddling over their baby niece or nephew. But they’d have to leave to get home to their family. The door would shut behind her, leaving her and her baby alone.

A tear dropping onto the baby blanket alerted Sarah that she was crying. She took a slow breath through her mouth trying to calm her emotions. But it wasn’t working. She needed to get out of the room before she really cracked. Keeping her gaze averted, she rose from the chair and placed the sleeping Karli back in her mother’s arms. When her arms were empty she strode from the room, ignoring the calls.

“I oughta kick both your asses,” Angie glared at the two men in the room as they stared at the door Sarah had all but run through. She cuddled her daughter to her breast, settling her back down from the sudden movement. “Just when I think I’m over my anger, Sarah says or does something that riles it back up again. I should have seen this coming. I can’t even go after her to see if she’s alright. So that leaves it to the two of you, and that’s not good either. You’ll say something to make matters worse. Not that you can help it, saying the wrong thing is attached to the Y chromosome.”

“Knock knock,” Kelley tapped softly on the door before sticking her head in. She smiled walked into the room, letting the door shut softly behind her. “I just saw Sarah…” she trailed off. “I was torn between chasing after her and knocking your heads together.”

“What’s up with the abuse today? I know I’m supposed to take it during labor, but that’s obviously over.” Hawk ran a finger down his daughter’s soft cheek.

“Men are such idiots,” Angie rolled her eyes at Kelley. “Will one of you go after Sarah and see if she’s okay?” She looked pointedly at Hawk.

“Not real stubble, Ang.” Hawk rose from his chair. He kissed his daughter’s forehead before walking from the room.

“It’s amazing they can get anything accomplished,” Kelley shook her head and leaned down to take Karli from her mother.

“I’m still here you know,” Dale spoke up. His leg bounced; he itched to run after Sarah. He saw her tear-filled gaze before she ran from the room. His heart twisted seeing the tears. It made it worse knowing he carried half – if not more – of the blame.

“We know,” Kelley said as she sat down in the chair Sarah had vacated. “She’s so beautiful, Angie. Absolutely gorgeous.”

“I know,” Angie beamed proudly. Her eyes flicked from her child to Dale. “How did your trip to Raleigh go?”

“It got interrupted,” Dale’s words came out short and clipped. He sighed and rubbed his face. “Sorry. It was going good… I think. She hadn’t kicked me out. She was listening.”

“Did you tell her you loved her?” Kelley asked, her eyes not leaving the precious bundle in her arms, but she smiled.

Dale stared at his sister in shock, but she wouldn’t look at him. His eyes drifted to Angie who smiled knowingly at him. He couldn’t even fathom how they knew his feelings. He shook his head. “No.”

“Pity,” Kelley said, finally meeting her brother’s gaze. “You could have saved a lot of time and trouble if you would have just told her.”

“Don’t worry about Hawk, Dale,” Angie’s tone turned serious. “He may put on a front and be a stubborn ass but he really only wants Sarah to be happy. To be loved and taken care of.”

“But not with me,” Dale said. He could still vividly remember the anger Hawk had portrayed that day at his house.

“He’s just upset he’ll lose his best friend. That you won’t be able to come over and play as much,” Angie’s lips twitched with a smile while Kelley laughed.

“Seriously, tell her.” Kelley nailed her brother with a look. “End all this…this… whatever it is.” She searched his gaze and shook her head when she saw apprehension. “God, men are so dense.” She rolled her eyes. “If she didn’t love you, she wouldn’t have been this upset with you. If she didn’t love you, it wouldn’t have mattered.”

“Kelley’s right, Dale. If Sarah didn’t love you, this wouldn’t have hurt so much. You need to tell her.”

*~*~*~*~*

Sarah sat on a bench in the courtyard, curled into herself, the tears streaming down her face. A couple people stopped to ask if she was alright, she placated them, blaming her tears on hormones and the birth of her brand new niece. She swiped at her tears with her hands, drawing her knees to her chest. She needed to get a control over her emotions. Right now there were going to be a lot of questions when she finally went back to Angie’s room.

She didn’t know how hard it would be holding Karli. She didn’t know her mind would drift. She thought she could turn her problems and be happy for Hawk and Angie. And she was. She was ecstatic for the growing family; that they add a little girl.

It made her wonder how she ever thought she was strong enough to go through with being artificially inseminated. She would have been alone in the delivery room and when visiting hours were over alone in her room with her child. She wouldn’t have an equivalent of Hawk standing next to her, seeing to her needs, making sure she was comfortable and that everything she wanted, she had.

And now life was going to get more complicated. And she wanted to curse fate and give him the finger. The relationship between her and her brother was tattered. They hadn’t spoken in weeks. She didn’t think it was irreparable. The anger and hurt she had felt so many weeks ago had faded as she listened to Dale. Embarrassment reigned. How was she supposed to get their relationship back to where it was? She didn’t think a simple, ‘I’m sorry’, worked in this situation.

Sarah startled as a body dropped down next to her. Before she could react, she was engulfed in a crushing hug. Her brother’s familiar cologne filled her nose and she allowed herself to be hugged, leaning into him.

“I wish I could rewind time until about two months ago,” Hawk murmured against the top of his sister’s head. “I could stop myself from being an ass and today would be much different.” 

“It’s okay,” Sarah mumbled.

“No it’s not,” Hawk pulled away so he could look at his sister. “I’m sorry Sarah. I truly am sorry for the way I acted. I shouldn’t have went off like that.”

Sarah shook her head, wiping the stray tears away. “I should be apologizing. I thought… I thought you guys talked about me, laughed at my expense…”

Hawk was already shaking his head before Sarah finished. “No, Sarah. I should learn to keep my mouth shut. For what it’s worth I never meant to mention the pregnancy to the guys; it just sort of slipped out. If you wanted to know, the guys thought you are a very strong and brave woman for taking something like that on. And they are right. I am proud of you for making that decision…”

“I’m not going through with it,” Sarah cut in, halting his words. She was sure he knew, Angie would have told him as soon as she hung up the phone.

“You should,” Hawk took her hands in his, squeezing them reassuringly. He felt his own eyes prick with tears. “I’m sorry Sarah that I had a part in this decision. I don’t know how you can forgive me for ruining this for you. I do love you and I have loved you since the first time Mom placed you in my arms at the hospital. If you can find it in yourself to trust me again, I’ll do a much better job this time around.”

Sarah stared at her brother, seeing a tear make its way down his cheek. She reached up and brushed it away. “I love you, Hawk,” she laid her head on his shoulder as they fell into a comfortable silence.

“Angie told me about the cruise you’re going on,” Hawk said after a moment. “I know you’re going by yourself but I’d feel better if you didn’t. Take Angie. She needs a break from me. I’ve driven her nuts.”

“I’m not going,” Sarah’s voice lowered. She didn’t know what was wrong with her, she had never been this indecisive before.

“Why not? Come on Eyas, I was hoping to surprise her with this. I was gonna babysit both kids and let her get away for a week with them and more importantly me. Don’t ruin this for me!” The last came out in a teasing whine.

Sarah giggled and lifted her head. Hawk’s earlier words came back to her and she realized telling him her news first would help them get back on track; to let him know that she did trust him. “Sorry Hawk, you’re gonna have to come up with something different to make it up to your wife.” She looked down, fiddling with her fingers.

“Oh man,” Hawk sat up straighter. “I know that look. You have something to tell me and you aren’t sure how I’ll take it. Lay it on my Eyas.”

“I’m pregnant. For real this time.”

Hawk froze at his sister’s word. He stared at her unseeing. His gaze dropped to her flat stomach and lifted his questioning eyes back to hers. “I don’t… I didn’t…”

“It came about the old fashioned way. I’ll spare you the details. I found out this morning,” her words stopped as she realized that it was just that morning she was sitting in the doctor’s office receiving the words that she was pregnant. It was just that morning she had returned home to find Dale in her apartment. “I’m six weeks along.” She said softly. Her eyes holding steady to his, watching as he did the math in his head. She watched as his eyes widen.

Hawk’s mind jumbled together. His sister was pregnant. She was pregnant. Sarah was pregnant. The word chanted in his head. But this was not by a number in a file. She was pregnant and Dale… He swallowed and tried to keep a neutral expression on his face. He found it wasn’t that hard and even felt a smile twitching at his lips. “Is this where I go and beat him up for knocking my sister up?”

Sarah giggled, shedding the tension, allowing herself to relax. “He doesn’t know. I don’t know how…”

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about,” Hawk wrapped an arm around her shoulders, holding her to his side. He grinned widely. He was going to be an uncle! “Sometimes Dale isn’t as expressionless as he thinks he is. I know he’s wanted a child for awhile now. It just…”

“Wasn’t in the cards for him.” Sarah finished all too knowingly. “Fate can be funny sometimes.”

“Yes it can.

“Think you can keep your big mouth shut until I can tell him?” Sarah asked teasingly.

“Only if you do it soon,” Hawk answered. “Like today. You know how I can’t keep something from Angie. She always knows when I’m hiding something.”

“Today?” Sarah squeaked.

“Come on Eyas. I’ve had a lot of time to think these past six weeks. Saw things I didn’t notice the first time around. I should have seen it a long time ago.” He turned to look at her. “He loves you. And if you don’t believe me, ask Angie. She fielded his weekly calls about you.”

“She fielded my calls too,” she said softly her mind mulling over Hawk’s words. Dale loved her. She looked at Hawk, the smile on her lips growing. “I love him too.”

Hawk groaned good naturally. “I’m gonna lose my best friend to a girl.” He stood up from the bench and pulled his sister up.

“I’ll let him come and play occasionally,” Sarah chuckled.

“Hey,” Hawk’s grin grew impossibly wider as they made their way back into the hospital. “You know the rules, you’re moving back home.”


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty Two

Dale pushed open the door to his house allowing Sarah to enter first. He had been surprised when she accepted his offer to go back to his place. He wanted to talk. He wanted to finish the conversation they started at her place. He wanted to know the reason why she ran from the room in tears. He wanted to know what happened between her and Hawk that had them returning to the hospital room smiling and laughing like the last six weeks hadn’t happened.

And he was jealous, if he’d admit that to himself. He watched them talk and laugh with each other; pass looks across the room like they carried a secret between the two of them. All along, leaving him somewhat on the outside looking in. Like their bond strengthened while his stayed frayed, the twines one by one breaking.

Nails clattered on the floor and Dale watched Stroker and Killer rushing toward the door. He stayed back as Sarah dropped to her knees, petting both dogs affectionately. He was hit with a sense of déjà-vu; the scene eerily family with the weekend after Dover. The night before everything imploded. 

“Hi guys,” Sarah laughed and smiled as Killer licked her face. “I guess you did miss me.” She rubbed Stroker’s side when he lay on the floor. “Have you been taking care of your Daddy? Huh?”

Dale rolled his eyes but a small smile played at his lips as he listened to Sarah talk to his dogs. “Sometimes I think you like my dogs more than you like me.”

“Well, they are better mannered sometimes.”

“Ouch.” Dale grimaced as he moved passed her, stepping over his sprawled out dogs. Maybe having her over to talk wasn’t a good thing.

Sarah stood up quickly, cursing herself. She meant it as a joke, but it obviously fell flat. She grasped his hand and turned him around to face her. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. It was supposed to be a joke. We aren’t quite back to the relationship we once had.”

Dale sighed, blowing out a breath. He tugged on her hand, pulling her forward. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her against him. He buried his face in the side of her hair. His eyes slid close when he felt her arms circle his waist and lean into him.

“I’m sorry Eyas,” he said softly. “For everything. For making you think that I would offer to father your child because someone else said it was a good idea. For making you think that I would tell people what happens between us. For making…”

Sarah raised her head and placed a finger over his lips stopping his words. “You don’t have to apologize anymore. I forgive you. I hope you can forgive me.” She saw his questioning gaze and explained. “If what happened between the three of us wasn’t a big overreaction on my part, I don’t know what is. I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did. I know Hawk and I know you. I know you guys wouldn’t do that; to me, to Angie, Kelley.”

“Does this mean you are going to start answering my calls and texts again? Returning my messages?”

Sarah smiled sadly. “I’m sorry. I should have answered you.” Her hands came to rest on his chest, his arms still wrapped around her as if he didn’t want to let her go. “I still have them. Well, the e-mails anyway. I haven’t read them.”

“Don’t. I sounded like a lovesick teenager.”

Sarah grinned. “That makes me want to read them so much more.” She laughed when Dale groaned. She wanted to blurt out that she was pregnant. It had been on the tip of her tongue the moment they were alone on the way home from the hospital. She figured announcing that in the middle of traffic wasn’t the best place for that kind of news. But now she had so many things to say. And she didn’t know how to begin.

“Why did you offer to be the father of my child?”

If Dale was surprised by the question he didn’t show it. He took her hand and led her into the living room to sit down. They sat next to each other on the couch. Her hand stayed in his; fingers tangled.

“Honestly?” Dale asked and saw Sarah nod. “I’m thirty four years old. I have this big house for just me. There’s not a thing out of place, everything is sparkling clean. I come home after the weekend away and I’m met with no one. People my age have two, three, four kids already. And there are none in sight for me. And I want kids. I want someone to leave everything to, to pass on everything I know.

“I want to come home and have running feet meet me at the door. I want to see finger prints on the glass and step on Barbie shoes and match box cars. I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

Sarah felt herself tear up at Dale’s words. She squeezed his hand as she looked at him. “But you knew I didn’t want a relationship? Why did you offer?”

“I figured I couldn’t get anything better.” Dale cringed, the words coming out all sorts of wrong. “I thought…” he broke off not knowing how to say what he was trying to say without making himself look worse in Sarah’s eyes.

“You thought if you couldn’t have the real thing, this was the next best thing?” Sarah offered.

“Yeah,” Dale sighed.

“That’s how I felt. Thirty years old and no man in my life, not even prospects. I wanted a baby. I was tired of seeing friends having kids, announcing they were pregnant. I was jealous of Angie and Hawk. I just felt alone…”

They fell into a moment of silence before Dale sat up and faced her. “That wasn’t the only reason I offered. I mean it was at the beginning, but now… You know I told Hawk that not all of us were lucky to have found their other half so early in life. That’s a lie.”

Sarah looked at him oddly, wondering where he was going with this. Her heart thumped faster as it jumped to conclusions. Her mind told her to hold off, not to let her heart get broken.

“You were there. I was just too stupid to realize it.”

Sarah’s breath caught at his words. She opened her mouth and closed it again.

“I don’t know what it was, but when Hawk told me about you wanting to have a baby, my mind would turn off. You were everywhere. I dreamed of us having kids. I guess something clicked in my brain. And maybe I always had feelings for you. But never realized it.”

“What are you trying to say Dale?” Sarah asked softly, her hopes rising.

Dale took both her hands in his and turned so he could face her. Looking into her eyes he said, “I love you Sarah.”

Nothing prepared her for the onslaught of emotions that spiraled within her at his words. Tears welled in her eyes and spilled over, rolling down her cheeks. Her lips parted, but no words came out. They couldn’t get past the lump in her throat. He loved her! Dale loved her!

“And when I think about it and see how much time we wasted, I kick myself. I should have known my feelings for you a long time ago.” Dale continued when Sarah remained silent. He grew worried when she didn’t say anything.

“Oh Dale,” she breathed out. She released his hands so she could wipe the tears from her face. “God… I… Dale…” she couldn’t stop babbling. And for this blamed her hormones. Remembering the baby she carried caused the tears to start again.

“Sarah?” Dale asked worriedly. “If you don’t feel the same way…” His own heart constricted at the thought. He didn’t want to hear her gently let him down; to tell him she didn’t love him like that.

“What?” Sarah spoke through the tears. Giving up trying to mop up her face she took his hands in hers. “Don’t feel the same… Dale, I love you too.” She gave him a watery smile.

The pressure released from his heart and he felt as if he were drifting. He soared. He pulled her to him. He captured her lips in a fierce kiss. He tasted her tears and palmed both her cheeks. “Why are you crying?”

“Oh Dale,” she rested her hands on his as they sat on her cheeks. “This morning…” her voice cracked and she took a moment to collect herself. “Oh… I haven’t had that long to actually think about it; with you being at the apartment when I got home, then Hawk’s call.”

“What’s going on?” Dale asked, confused.

“I’m pregnant.” She blurted and wished for a do over so she could break the news in a better manner.

“What?” Dale asked softly, frozen.

Sarah smiled. She removed her hands and placed them on his face so she was cradling his face. “I’m pregnant.” She whispered again, watching as his eyes watered. “We both got what we wanted and more.”

“Pregnant,” Dale breathed. “You’re going to have a baby?” His mind had turned to mush. He could barely string words together to form a coherent sentence.

“We’re going to have a baby.” Sarah corrected him. She reached for his hand and placed it over her still flat stomach where she was nurturing their child. “I’m six weeks along. You are the father Dale. I never had the procedure done in New York. This baby is yours… Ours.”

“Our baby,” Dale whispered staring at her stomach. He brought his tear-filled gaze back up to meet Sarah’s. “You’re pregnant?”

Sarah nodded, giggling. “Are you okay?”

Dale nodded numbly. “I never… wow.” He finally snapped from the trance he had been in. The fog lifted from his mind. “We’re going to have a baby,” he said more firmly and stood from the couch, pulling Sarah up with him. He took her in his arms and held her tight then spun around. He laughed out loud. “We’re having a baby.” He stopped spinning to gaze down at the woman in his arms.

“We’re having a baby,” Sarah confirmed, smiling at him. She entwined her arms around his neck, holding him close. 

“I love you,” Dale dipped his head, brushing his lips against hers once, twice before settling upon them. His lips moved with hers as he tried to portray the love he felt.

“I love you,” Sarah broke the kiss and laid her head on his chest, content to stay in his arms.

“What were the stipulations for you moving here after you became pregnant?” Dale asked, breaking the small silence that rang out as they just held each other.

“That he’d find me a job and a place to live.” Sarah’s eyes drifted close, the day catching up with her.

“You can start at the shop as soon as you get moved in here.”

His words caused Sarah to lift her head and stare at him with a raised eyebrow. He smirked at her, giving her a challenging look. She rolled her eyes and laid her head back down on his chest. She smiled, feeling him press a kiss to the top of her head. “We’ll discuss that later. Right now I’m too tired.”

“Sure,” Dale placated her, leading her through the house and up the stairs to his bedroom. “We’ll discuss it later.”

They undressed and crawled under the covers, navigating toward each other. Dale wrapped his arms around her, holding to against him as she rested her head on his chest. He felt her release a sigh and snuggle closer. He placed another kiss on the top of her head. His future was right here, in his arms. He had the woman he loved; the woman he was gonna marry (soon if he could talk her into it). And he had his first child; the first of many. As he closed his eyes, he wasn’t sure how life could get any better.


End file.
